Husband doesn't talk much - suggestions?

Hi,

Welcome to indusladies.
after reading your post i remind my days.iguess you are newly married?
in my initial days my hubby is also the same.
really i was vexed up.u can also
but take a good time and please discuss with him in nice voice.just say him please try to understand you problem .
mean while make good friends in your apt.
i know staying at home really so frustrate us. in austin search for people to pass your time until he comes.so that u feel bit better.
but take good time and express him your feeling and way you wnat to live.

 

Have you told your h how you feel. Not in anger but calmly in good mood. When you express your feelings don't point fingers at his other actions with his sis and parents. Just say how is actions towards you makes you feel. All you are asking is communication / conversation with you.

 

hi..What I can suggest is why dont you initiate conversation with him without waiting for him to do it.What I mean is not asking him questions which he just replies with a yes or no,instead just talk about your day etc...general conversations.Maybe if you do it everyday,he might also open up and just start discussing more things with you.

But I do sympathise with you when you say that he doesnt even smile at you when he comes back from office....I mean ,how much effort can that take!

 

Hey Lady,

Welcome - this is a great place for advice

I get it.. everything you say. My DH is .was.. maybe still is? like your's. On top of that, we had a love marriage, isn't that nuts? Before marriage he talked a lot. After marriage.. 2 mos were great.. then it was funny.. ok horrible until right around our 1 year.

The first 2 years are the best times to sort things out. Make rules for each other is you must - like no TV during dinner; cook together; date nights; play games - yes even video games with your DH (men like that sort of stuff); do romantic things to sway him from technology and boredom (massages, sweet talk, have surprises).

Don't get upset b/c this is all normal. Us women and men are different. If your SIL doesn't answer your phone.. stop calling them. Focus on yourself - exercise, take fun classes (sewing, art, craft), decorate the house, do kitchen experiments.

I had a VERY hard time with this situation.. and sometimes still do. But now I can just tell DH - get off the phone.. stop watching TV.. stop texting.. "you're boring me".. lol

 

Why did your SIL have to come and stay with you when you were newly married?:spin

I second what a PP said about engaging yourself in some activities that interest you. That will give you less time to brood about this at home. You can also try and ask DH to take you out some evenings-dinner, a walk or a drive etc. Even if he does not talk much, it will at least be you-and-DH quality time. If he is tired after work, ask him to take you out at least one or two days in a week after work.

Ignore your SIL. Believe me, the more you try to keep in touch without her being interested about it, the more resentment you will build up later. Call her only on special occasions. If she does not call back, just send an email or ignore her. But be friendly and cordial when you meet her in person. Do not have expectations from her.

My DH too talks a lot less compared to me, but after my discussing with him about it n times, he has started to talk a wee bit more. I realized that that's his personality and now try not to nag him too much.

 

Some men are just not good with small talk and take a lot of time to talk unless there is a need. With your IL's he has lived more than 20 yrs of his life and so there is no efffrt required to talk to them. Like we can talk to our relatives.friends for hours but with a new person it takes time. As newly weds, you will have to create good memories about which you can be happy & talk later on in life..Go out often, have dinners outside(or even make romantic dinners at home), movies, travel, something which will excite both of u.

 

I will say get busy...very very very busy in your life...
I bet he will start missing your attention..!!
He needs your attention much more than you think.....just make yourself a bit "unavailable" to him...
why dont you get busy with your phonecalls ...parents..friends...novels...hobbies...work....and start enjoying whatever means you have to enjoy. Trust me...he will start wanting you more and more....
Also dress up attractively.....not for him, but for yourself..