TTC progress and two weeks wait...

Discussion in 'Fertility & Trying to Conceive' started by seeba27, Sep 8, 2008.

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  1. Bambli

    Bambli Gold IL'ite

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    hi gals

    i want to get some opinion and advice from u gals...

    i have notice my in-laws being different now ever since they know i'm pregnant. I told them about this news when i was 6 weeks... they didnt bother to call me or visit me after that. They came to see me last week, that also after my hubby request them to come. I see a lot of difference in their talking and behaviour....

    My sil is married for 4 years and she got no kids... so i was telling my in-laws to advice her to do shasti pooja and take medication, but they didnt bother. And suddenly MIL said that my sil have no time to do pooja since she is working... only people have no work will do this craps"

    then my hubby was asking me to drink milk, and suddenly my mil said
    "those days we dont bother about eating healthy foods n still we give birth to healthy babies but now a days people are eating this and that as though no one in the world hv conceive before" Her words really hurts me a lot...
    why suddenly she have say this ???
    My hubby also was very angry and shouted back to his mother.

    Then my fil was telling my hubby that once our baby is born, we should give the baby to them. They will take care and raise my baby..

    What is this ??? We have struggle for this baby for 7 years and they want to take away my baby from me ??? I feel so sad ! and cried !

    Then next day before they go back, my hubby was joking with his mother..telling her that she have to come here on August so she can take care my baby n me. u know what my MIl said..
    " Why should i come ???"
    so my hubby asked her "so u will go and take care ur DD ??"
    she said "yes, it my duty to taking my DD if she delivery a baby"
    My hubby answered her back " i know u will say this and i already decided take a maid to take care my baby n my wife long time ago... dont worry, i will never ask any help from u.."

    come on gals... then whom am I ???
    i'm just a third person is it ???
    What makes them to change like this ?? they suppose to be happy, am i rite ?? Aren't they happy that i'm going to give them first grand child ??

    when i asked my hubby why they are doing this to me, my hubby said maybe they r not happy that i got conceived before his sister... i cant accept his answer.

    so i told everything to my mom. she gave same answer.
    she say maybe my in-laws are little upset that their DD have not conceive yet..
    and showing their anger to me..

    pls tell me gals... why they changed now ???
    PLS HELP !!!
     
    Last edited: Jan 26, 2011
  2. kinjal

    kinjal Bronze IL'ite

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    looks like your mom and husband is right.
    Dont bother about inlaws right now....concentrate on your and your baby's health.....that's most important right now..
    have happy and healthy pregnancy.


     
  3. Mallie

    Mallie Senior IL'ite

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    Hai Bambli dear

    Was really happy to know about ur pregnancy. You have really achieved after all those hardships you facedDear do take care of ur self. Why bother about anybody else when u have such a caring husband. Just forget their tantrums and u concentrate on ur health and ur baby.
     
  4. ashakarthik

    ashakarthik Silver IL'ite

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    dear bambli...mil will be mil..probably there will be a few exceptions..she cannot become ur mother right..and yes after reading ur post i feel they are upset..nor for that u are pregnant..just that their own dd dint conceive.and imagine it is soo natural right..
    i know what u think..if she thinks u as her own dd then she sd be happy for u.but she is so frustrated and not accepting anything.
    better stop worrying about her.You have got two most affectionate and supportive pple around u.who else ur own mom and dh.whom else u want.now third person ur lo is also gonna join..why worrying abt others ???

    bambli its time to party and stop worrying...especially crying.tell them to go to their place asap.and be happy.they will also be happy once they see ur lo.and who will not love the lady who has given a cute baby for them????

    enjoy!!!!!!

    ps:now i wanna tell u something..i have planned to do fasting on sashti days after reading ur thread.marked those days also from one post.went to swami malai also.So let anyone call anything as crap.we have our own believes and that is only gonna help us!!!!!

    all the best and take care

    asha
     
  5. ashakarthik

    ashakarthik Silver IL'ite

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    sad sad sad...i got my af today..that too after thirty thirty three days...lots of hope shattered...
    hmmm will try this month....

    baby dusts for all of you!!!

    [​IMG]
     
  6. hemadurga

    hemadurga Bronze IL'ite

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    hey bambli,
    its really nice that u have become pregnant after 7 yrs and also doing sasti poojai continuosly... so we commend u on this achievement,

    so i think for some time jsut forget what ur inlaws are saying and just your work and sasti poojai and be at peace...

    dont trouble ur mind on this unnecessary thing, now that you are supposed to be happy....

    so just leave for time to heal relations.... and take care of yourself and your baby first !!
     
  7. Vasumathy

    Vasumathy Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi SM,
    Sorry about your periods! Relax dear. Don't expect much. Expectations increases stress & could delay periods! When i was done with my first IVF my sil got pregnant, When my periods had a worst delay, my sis got pregnant. My DH says someone in great need gets the blessings! Better wait for our turn!
    Start the new cycle with positive attitude. Take care.

    Asha,
    Sorry about your periods dear. Don' feel bad! Start the new cycle with positive frame of mind!

    Mallie,
    Good to see you back. How are you doing?

    Baby dust to all TTC ladies...
     
  8. Vasumathy

    Vasumathy Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Bambli,
    I am not going to say something different from what your DH & mom told.
    This is my analysis(Not hurt or harm anyone!): most mothers prefers to take care of their daughters, their delivery & kids. I don't say they won't look after son's wife but priority changes.... First preference given to their DD! Most girls prefers being with their mother than MIL since they feel closeness with mother more! Mom has seen her baby from the childhood & mil seen her only after marriage! Whatever the cases mil can't be a girls mom, there are few exception always.
    My mom seen my struggle towards TTC, she took care of sil when she was pregnant to her goodness. When i gone to my mom's place for IVF 2WW, my mom gave priority to me than my sil who was pregnant already. I know my mom showed some difference, SIL doesn't bother as she too wanted to see the growth in me!
    Don't worry about your mil or consider her words & treatment. She must have occupied with other thoughts. Leave her with her worries. This is not a right time for you to do the analysis & solve the trouble. Leave it to your DH & GOD! Let her come out of all these by herself. If she is not willing to touch her first grand child, leave her with her own works.
    My colleague told, her MIL came to see the baby after the delivery & never returned baby till now(its more than one month now!), she was busy with other works at home. There are some people like this. Don't expect anything from anyone! Expectations in any form, in any one kills us!
    Don't allow your pregnancy hormone to boil with these thoughts. Leave it, carry out your works & enjoy your day; forget the troubles. Your DH is by your side, he is the great support till your delivery or till the last day in this earth. Stick to him! Move on with your life!
    Stop worrying/crying. Just be happy. Enjoy your days. Don't allow another chance to get hurt through those elders! Move on with your life & pregnancy! Take care!
     
  9. Mallie

    Mallie Senior IL'ite

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    Thanks Vasumathy for addressing me. Iam fine but still stuck with this TTC thing. Feel sad sometimes....emotional......angry.....withdrawn sometime. But no matter what have to undergo this. Sometimes I feel there is no one in the world for me....sometimes feel ok. Well don't know how long have to undergo this wait.

    Though I visit this forum once in a while but feel nothing to write coz no updates. Anyway today i felt I will write something......
     
  10. jayshreereddy

    jayshreereddy New IL'ite

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    Hai All TTc women
    today i have been to the Doddamallur navneetha krishna temple and have lighted a deepam for all the TTC and already would be moms .
    So all the best all of u
     
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