Help me resolve the problem with my husband..

Your husband is too stubborn! You must first find out which is this alternate place of stay where he goes for almost a week, by whatever means, so that you can decide your next steps. Also, do not call him up. Ignore him. Let him wonder what happened, why you aren't calling him up, etc etc. Even when he returns, mind your own business (i.e. you and your kids) rather than showing your love or care for him (in case you do).

I hope things get resolved at the earliest.

 

Dear,
One cannot walk out and in to the marriage at their own will.
Ask him to grow up and behave like an adult. When there is an issue it must be sorted out through communication.

Usha, wife and husband (both) must be depend on each other and must be approachable to each other. It does not work only if one person does this and other person gets a free ride. You need to stop calling him whenever he leaves. As long as you keep calling him, he keeps leaving and taking you for granted. Just stop calling him even now.

I also think you should communicate about this behavior to your parents/siblings. Just talk to your family if possible and see if they can put some sense into his head.

 

Sorry to say this dear, but something seems fishy:

You have already told us that you do not know where he goes when he is out of the house for days at a time, very sad and strange!

can you answer these questions for us:
1) Do you have access to any credit card statements etc to see if he is staying at a hotel?
2) who are his close friends who would let him stay in thier house while he is fighting with his wife? Wouldn't they encourage to patch things up

and last question (really think about this one)

Do you think he is looking for any excuse to get mad at you and then leave the house for a few days?? I know you said it's generally during disagreement, but do you think a lot of disagreements are arising lately?

Has he always been like this in your marriage or is this a new pattern? Something more recent over tha past year or so that has been getting worse?

I am so sorry dear, this must be ver difficult and distressing for you not knowing where he is, not knowing where you marriage is going, and taking care of the kids. It's unfair you are in this position! Think about the questions above and let us know. we will try our best to help you.

 

Nidhi...u hit the nail on the head!

Dear OP...ur husband is either behaving like a kid...and therefore should be treated like a kid..

Or he is not on the right path...and that my dear will require you to be assertive and set things right... you owe this to yourself and to your children

 

is he a human? Emotional blackmail is the worst...

I guess you need to stop begging him 100-200 times when he is gone and ignore that he existed, like he is ignoring you during the separation. I think u falling at his feet each time only will make matters worse if you cannot handle to be a slave always.

Next time he leaves or plans to leave, just tell him, he will *NOT* be able to come back here again this time as this is not a motel and you are a callgirl. If he respects you as his wife, then he better put the effort to sort out the differences than running away.

Secondly, is he truthful.. A guy walking away for weeks regularly is fishy... check it out !!

 

First get toughen up and be ready to face any consequence. It is not wise to trust this man who leaves his wife and two small kids for days and disappears. Try getting family help etc and get a job. Meanwhile if he does this agin, call police and give a missing persons report..

I don't think he would do this next time onceyou call police. Well...you may have to face drastic consequences, but better make your point clear and try correcting him then keeping mum, suffering silently for ever. This is making or breaking..so do it carefully but confidently.

Good Luck

 

hi usha,

like others said stop calling him.
will he answer if you call from a different number?

like venonimiss suggested i too agree that you should make a police report that your husband is missing. that serves him rite!!

 

If he packed his bags and went out in anger, then he is "not" missing. That would be a false report, and pls. dont advice wasting police time with false reports.