Have you read this article about desis in NJ in the Time Magazine?

Kimaya, I lived in NJ. And if one wants to feel that one is still living in India and not United States, one should go and live in NJ. It is dirty, crowded, smelly and expensive.

And of course, you would see a lot of Indians there so would feel like India..

 

Thanks Mariam :thumbsup

 

Nope DCH. We dont have to.

Highlighted is the essense that i wanted to bring in. Differences are there. Just dont bother. One need not be a close buddy to understand a different culture or point of view, i think. Interact with everybody irrespective of race/caste/creed/color/region/language/smelly/oily with respect and move close with whomever you want to move at the end of the day that is what we want in life dont we? as a matter of fact, am the only Indian at my work and in this field in here I am form peak northern part of India and my Wife hails from heart of southern India

Live and let others live as long as their actions are not causing harm to anybody. Smelly/curry does not matter to me. But if i see something that causing harm to others i would do just like Mariam did (in her encounter with some kids throwing stones at an animal)/ if you see somebody leaving carts not in the cart stand instead in the parking sapces, that sometimes they hit the car causing not much damage but still..its not done.. such things need be objected.

 

And if you were; do they expect a full confession. Some people....

Yes; I do sometimes hear such comments. Most of it will be"you speak english so well. Did you go to college here" . Well; my english is not that great; and initially I used to replay those comments in my mind to check whether it had sarcasic undertone. Now I understand; they are plain curious. I got to understand it from a psychatirist; who diagonised me a case of "high risk post-partum depression". He was surprised that I could communicate in english ; and he was more suprised to learn that english is the first language in schools; and kids learn it from KG class. He thanked me that he was very much benifitted from our session ))

People doesn't know much about us as people; just as a race. They know that we have multiple gods; eat curry; ofcourse the "arranged marriages" and the "lovely" tan complexion. And ofcourse; we cannot expect people to know everything about "being an Indian" or other 257 countries of the world. If someone says to me they are from "Dhekelia" or "Jan Mayen"; I will be like which part of the earth is that )))

So long as the questions do not borderline to insults it is ok and I do not think there is anything wrong in answering if you have the patience and time. The comment that they thought you guys to be native Indians; just shows their lack of awareness. If you feel that the qustions on arranged marriages are irksome; you can divert the conversation to "arranged polygamous" marriages practised by mormon community in US. I bet most of them will be ashamed to continue the disccusion.
-Nitha