Two to tango....

sujathaumakanth · Aug 30, 2010

Oh Oh what have I done??? Come on, et tu, my dear queen I have given you a heavy heart as well.......jokes apart, it is indeed a topic that I felt needed more scrutiny and awareness. I always am of the opinion that before we accuse others, we need to remind ourselves if we are worthy enough to cast the first stone.....that was all the message in this post, perhaps it came out too strongly.

I am sensing all these strong emotions in the air and now I seriously have second thots.......

Cheeniya · Aug 30, 2010

Dear Suja
You have taken me back by over 50 years by mentioning Nathaniel Hawthorne and his masterpiece ‘The Scarlet Letter’. In the late ‘50s, I was a member of a literature appreciation society which was started by an eminent teacher of my college to promote not only good reading habit but a taste for classic literature as well. Since my schooling was entirely in Tamil medium, I was very eager to participate in this elite English forum and that proved to be a great boon for me. We were once given The Scarlet Letter for discussion and I still remember how agitated my classmates became after reading this novel. The discussions lasted three full days and I still remember those three days!

Your opening para on the stoning of stray dogs by the street urchins made me feel very uncomfortable. Paranoid or not, the street kids have this habit from birth. Maybe the kids consider the street dogs as their perpetual rival and keep attacking them. ‘Shoot at sight’ is the unwritten command that they all obey implicitly. The tragic part is that the dogs too know the kids’ tendency to terminate the canine population as a whole. You must see how frightened they become when they see the boys from the manner in which they tuck their tails between their hind legs. Whenever I see a well nourished dog going around in a BMW, I realize that God never differentiates between man and beast when it comes to economic inequalities.

We all know of the words of Jesus “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” to save a woman who was condemned to die by stoning on charges of adultery. Even in the days of Jesus, there was no one eligible to stone the woman after Jesus uttered these words. It is not as if that adultery and such heinous sins should go unpunished but such punishment should be fair and equitable. As you rightly point out, why such laws do not touch the male accomplice? Our puranas too are replete with such barbaric pronouncements. Did not Sage Jamadagni bid his son Parasurama to behead his mother Renuka for a perceived act of mental adultery? When Parasurama carried out this act, the much pleased father asked his son what boon he would like to have in return and he pleaded for his mother’s life and Renuka was revived.

According to me, the publication of the photographs of the women who are caught by the police in newspapers is worse than stoning to death. This is more barbaric than stoning them. We seem to derive particular pleasure in putting women to shame while shielding the male counterpart. I really do not know the logic.
Sri

ojaantrik · Aug 31, 2010

This is the first of your posts that I have read. I must say that I am deeply impressed and agree with everything you have said.

Why, I ask too, is the woman the only target? This has been happening through the centuries in almost all cultures. Or else, Hardy wouldn't have written about Tess. Recall that she was finally hanged. Nothing much happened to the person who was the root cause of the ruin that visited her.

Stoning is brutal, especially when the man goes scot free. Consider, however, what happens in large parts of North India. They don't even let the girls be born! To be born a female is a crime as it were. What sort of a civilized society is ours? As far as I am aware, Islam has nothing against the sex of the newborn. But they torture them after they are born.

You have spoken about a built in cruelty against women in the whole concept of humanity. Thoughts such as these make me shiver in pain.

oj-da

Balajee · Aug 31, 2010

Sujatha, the furore over the Iranian woman sentenced to death by stoning masks the fact that such things are rather a rule and not an exception in Muslim countries. The focus here is on Iran for the simple reason that the pro-US global media is turning the heat on Iran which happens to be anti -US Such sentences have been handed out even in Saudi Arabia and even in Pakistan by religious courts. But on them you'd find the media underplaying the incidents..If we are to condemn the sentence on the woman we have to condemn death sentence itself.regardless of the gender or nationality of the sentenced person. We should avoid the temptation to fall; into the trap of global opinion makers who want to portray the woman as a martyr of a despotic male-dominated nation. Let us not forget she has been sentenced to death for murdering her husband and death sentences for murder are in vogue in many countries including the United States.

sujathaumakanth · Aug 31, 2010

Dear Sri Uncle,

Perhaps it was because I read "Scarlet Letter" at quite an impressionable age, I still count it as one of the best classics I have ever read. Your lines about having studied in a Tamil medium school quite reminds me of my husband. He too did his entire schooling up to grade 10 in Tamil medium and then switched to English medium for his higher levels. He used to say initially it was like being caught in a maze, should I say blindfolded But later he went to UK for his Masters and produced the most wonderful assignments in English, a language that he quite struggled with initially. Infact I still turn to him asking him to review my academic papers as his command over written english is way better than mine Anyway I am digressing, but what I wanted to convey is my amazement and awe at the beauty of the language you deliver now

You are absolutely right - the publicity that media showers on such cases is a double edged sword. It brings the attention of the international community to the incident but unfortunately the lives of these women are already over. I still remember reading the words of Ashtiani something along the lines of "when my son witnessed the flogging I received, I already died.......what remains is a mere corpse". Well, hope her son is lucky enough as Parushuram in delivering his mother from her death sentence.

Kind regards,
Suja

sujathaumakanth · Aug 31, 2010

Dear OJ-da,

You do seem to have selective amnesia when it comes to me and my posts ) I remember you posting a feedback on one of my posts earlier "Children of a lesser God" and I was happy to learn that you knew and appreciated the film that I was talking about.

http://www.indusladies.com/forums/snippets-of-life-non-fiction/97842-children-of-a-lesser-god.html#post1260812

The Islamic faith always highlights the respect and regard that Prophet Mohammad had for his wives; however very few men practice this. Recently I read the works of Naguib Mahfouz ("The Cairo Trilogy") and you will be surprised to see how women were treated in Egypt early this century. Well, before we point our fingers at other cultures, I guess we are not guilt free as well. Empowerment of women is still a budding concept in our own country.

Thanks for your feedback OJ-da !!! Hoping you will remember me next time We have corresponded a few times on your website as well.

Cheers,
Sujatha

sujathaumakanth · Aug 31, 2010

Dear Balajee,

"Allegedly murdering" seems more fitting under these circumstances as we do not know what is the exact story - some reports, even Al Jazeera - the unbiased voice of the Arab world is not entirely sure of what is true and admit that she could have been coerced into that admission. Anyway if I remember correctly, the stoning is not for the murder but for the adultery. I am definitely not portraying Ashtiani as an innocent party - let us not forget the flogging she received already for her affairs, but again in my opinion, women are indeed "victims" of "a despotic male-dominated nation" if I may borrow your words ( as I quite like this phrase

When I initially published this post on my blog, a friend of mine reported that around the same time this furore was taking place, a man and woman were stoned to death in Afghanistan. My reply to his comment:

"I dont know what to say......should I feel vindicated that the man was punished too or should I grieve for lives that were taken because morality ranks higher than humanity. I feel sad Buda. We used to have bizarre customs as well in the past - burning widows for example. I am not able to find solace in religions that does not give respect to a human life".

I am not entirely sure of what is my stand against death sentence. Should we "turn the other cheek" or go "eye for an eye"......the grounding philosophies of some of the major religions in question However there are occasions when I am unable to control the rage that occurs when I see innocent lives taken by the whim of an insane and unrepentant mind - under such occasions I do feel perhaps the death sentence is justified. Again who are we to play God, but atleast we can act humane under such circumstances.

Well, I can go on and on about these topics, but again there is no right or wrong answer for such cases - we are merely airing out our views and our perspectives which may or may not achieve anything in the end.

Regards,
Sujatha

suria · Aug 31, 2010

dear sujatha,

you have again writtten a post which people overlook this message and look forward in case of men and brood , exxagerate in case of women..!!!

thanks for bringing it front..a very well written post..:thumbsup

ojaantrik · Aug 31, 2010

Of course I corresponded several times on the web. I do remember that Sujatha and I don't even confuse her with Sujata alias Kamla.

I guess my periodic disappearances from IL can explain why I keep losing track of people. It's a lame excuse though.

Incidentally, I remembered that Tess had after all killed the rascal. But society thought that was a crime!

There is something terribly wrong in all this. Britain gave voting rights to women only around the nineteen thirties. I forget the exact date.

oj-da

iswaryadevi · Aug 31, 2010

My heart is so heavy after reading your post...I do not have words to express my feelings now...My heart bleeds for the women. But is it enough? NO. Feeling very guilty...
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