Are there more stupid versions of MAMA'S boy than this?

If this is annoying you, why don't you ask him next time, "Can't you make any decision by yourself??" It'd be interesting to hear his answer.

 

Yes, This must be very irritating.Tolerating and ignoring these things can be to some extent but not throught your life or atleast up to your MIL's life time. What about intimacy he wants permission for that too?
Sorry can't stop asking that.

 

Everytime he says something like this don't you put an incredulous (unbelievable) look/face? To most people that should act as deterrent enough. The third or fourth time they should hesitate to say that.

May be you follow through and not show anything in your face. But it's so hard to do that!

 

I think you should start doing as he asks you to do like if he tells you to ask his mom about each and every small detail, go ahead and ask her literally each and everything for e.g "Mom should I massage my baby from top to bottom or bottom to top, Mom should I put 1/2 tsp. of salt or 3/4 tsp. specially when she is in middle of something like taking a bath or in the toilet, If he wants to wear some shirt ask him did you ask Mom before wearing it. When he shave ask him did you ask mom that this particular blade/cream will suit you or not". I am telling you when you nag your husband and your MIL like this either your MIL will get irritated and will tell you to take most of the decisions yourself or your husband will learn the lesson that he and you are not kids anymore but are grown up married adults and are capable of taking wise decisions yourself. I hope you are getting my point.

Take care
V n baby

 

I might sound outrageously annoying....but how about really checking and calling your MIL 100 times in a day...yes for every darn thing...call her up or talk to her and ask her genuinely what should be done. If you say I dont want to call or I wont call her, thats when all the fights and you can also see how your husband trusts his mom, more than you, so what does that show?? he is not on your side...isnt it??

So call your MIL as soon as you get up and ask her every damn thing...right from I am planning to make this breakfast, shall I? if she says yes, how to make it? what to put in it? shall i put this? will it taste better?or what ddoes your son like? which method he likes when you make it? I am planning to bathe the kid? which way should I do it? what to use hot or warm water? should I massage him? from head to toe? or toe to head? should I put water first or use soap first...

Be totally dumb for sometime. Dont try to use your brain. Just for coupleof days act dumb and ask her every possible thing...am sure she is going to get way too annoyed, she will also complain to her son saying your wife doesnt know anything she keeps calling for everything and asks me, and she would go on and on talking about what all you spoke to her or asked her!! from this

your husband would either understand that you genuinely consult his mom for everything....or he would ask his mom why is she getting so angry as thats what she wanted i.e her DIL consulting her for everything...Let both the mom and son decide what they want to...

If you go against them to handle such things...you would be the single woman army against both of them....rather join the gang and give them their own medicine...am sure your MIL would tell your husband TO STOP CALLING.

Try this and let me know how it works. You need to be really genuine and patient. and ensure you are calling her every 5 mins. YES literally every 5 mins. That way she shouldnt be able to do any of her work...

If she is staying with you guys, then make sure that she is behind you all the time..YES without her dont cook or do anything just sit idle...if asked say, I wanted your mom to show me what to do....Use tact rather than words...dont get one on one with your husband and fight/argue/nag him about he being a mommas boy..he wont see anything wrong in all this...so follow him and show him how odd it is....

 

Hi 1droplove,

I liked SriVidya75's solution , Just irritate them to level that thet cant even sleep... ;-)

after they get irritated and ask just say I am being more obeidient that you always expect and i cannot change anymore.

OR

Also just ask your husband , has he left his brains in his Mama's womb. That he has to consult her always.Tell him straight that you have your own brain and not dependent on MIL and tell that you are more knowlegeable in modern times and as per new requirements of child rearing and modern social marriage norms.

Actually my DH did that for sometime like ask MIL always and when I went to pediatrician and he simply said you are taking excellent care of your child and mother's instinct for a "child (mind it not adult like DH")" always works well specially if you are educated.

I also spoke in person to the pediatrician to handle my DH , as they believe in lots of crap that is harmful for upbringing of a child. So I see that he always handles my DH very nicely and sarcastically...
I love to see that..I actually discussed this with gyn also when I was going thru pregnancy , she also dealt with my husband and IL stupid suggestions properly.

--------reborn-------

-Yours INCARNATION- -- The only constant thing on this earth is change.

 

Sri's suggestion is excellent as always :thumbsup

Yes, if you can't beat them, join them. Just try what she suggested from word to word and it might work.

Good luck.:thumbsup

 

i myself posted a problem here. i wanted to add one thing. i did not agree with members who say call them repeatedly to irritate them. this will really irritate them and they take it a you are mocking them. this will be adding trouble to her already xisting problems. please do not think of taking revenge. its better you do as you want but do not think that they will see sense when you irritate them. When they are calm they were not able to see sense then how can they see sense when irritated they will trouble you more. like iamsudha suggestion might be good. asuitablegirl question is also valid but you can ask in different words.

Call her talk to her may once in 2 or 3 days. talk to her about the baby , her developments, things about her son, you. this is enough and i think they wanted this. if you follow this for a while they will not irritate you with requests i think.