to all going thru or gone thru divorce

EXACTLY!

Even OPs question is this..So NB you answered her very well Man/Woman, both have to maintain finances and plan ahead for any emergencies and create some contingency funds. For information on how to go about a secure financial planning etc, there are several resources over internet that help about tracking household budget, how to save for emergencies, and how much to save, how to invest and where to invest etc.

NMTKAR

Please come to money matters if you need more help on this. Please do not look at yourself as a POOR thing. NO. think and ASK What would MEN Do in such cases? What would ANYONE do? now you are the mom and dad for your kids. So handle things on those lines. Job loss, or transfers are the same doesnt matter men/women. All that matters is what you have in hand and how to make the best out of it. So do let us know if you have any queries on handling finances i.e investments/savings etc. Please go through some of the threads by SHAISHAV. he has explained step by step financial planning for everyones queries. Lots of useful info. Worth reading

 

NB, your views are too optimistic. What if there is no HR dept and court does not care about harassment cases? What if there are no jobs and you have little savings? You are depending on some type of support from society which will not be there in the future. In that situation its best to be married and FYI there are millions in the US who lost their jobs and are out on the streets right now, so I'm not talking about the future, just the present.

 

Sweetheart! What if the world ends:biglaughcan we be that pessimistic???come on...not just single women, even single income families where men are the only breadwinners also lost their jobs, also facing racial issues, also facing physical stress and trauma,So its not about BEING SINGLE/MARRIED. its about how to handle situations at hand. Being married doesnt give someone a red carpet welcome wherever they go or being single doesnt make hte path all thorny !!! If that was the case..things would have been very very different

So as per you both wife andd husband has to work, and both of them shouldnt loose jobs, both of them shouldnt have issues at work or in marriage...doesnt it seem like too ideal???

All Humanbeings go through challenging situations..now it depends on how they handle it..instead of blaming it on the marital status,or the job situation in the world, or the stress at work or home, better standup and handle it

 

And what if get married in hopes of the spousal support and later find there is none?

And what if the person we marry for the sake of support is also thrown out of the jobs? shall we go marry someone else that has a job? and so on and so forth?

See. lots of ifss and buts. do we see these reason enough to decide on marriages?

 

Rosequeen,

Theres always 2 views to see - if the glass is half full or half empty! Yours are all valid ifs, buts, hows and whens situations....you know now I have some questions to ask you...what if you are happily or rather securely married and your hubby suddenly dies in car accident? what if he is one fine day diagnosed with some terminating illness? what if u die? what if something else happens? so would you not marry at all then? What if you step out of the house and a lightning strikes on you or him? Seems to me that, your view of marriage is more like a secure bank account!!! where in you make sure that your finances are secure by being married? is that all marriage is all about?

dear, lots of women come to this life without spouse forum after going thru a lot of emotional turmoil and they are already weak and lack confidence dealing with the men of their life. They come here to look for some guidance, support and valid views from others going thru or have gone thru similar situations. In such cases, it only makes sense for us other ppl here to give them some sane and practical advises, to support them, uplift their confidences and give them strength. Rather than pulling them down by giving all such what ifs in lifes and make them more weaker.

Regards,
NB

 

Yep thats the attitude you need at this time:cheersnothing is difficult or impossible....you can do it provided you have that positive attitude...experience is built over years...and amsure one step at a time when youknow all the planning is in your hands, you would be able to make BETTER judgements than waiting for your spouse to ACT and make some plans..waiting for someones approval is most irritating than actually taking things in your hand and making the best out of it.:thumbsup Good luck

 

New Beginning,

Very well said!. Though this post is 1 year old, I just happened to read it today and I can't hold back from appreciating you.

You hit the nail correctly.

Kudos to you.

 

I see that you are in California with a kid. , same as me.
I am planning for divorce & would like to get some information on Child custody/ moving back to India after divorce. Can you please give some info?
Thanks.