Ms.Understood

Being misunderstood is not an art. It is not a skill that develops over time with the inability of people to express themselves clearly. It is an inherent gift of God that only a select few in this world have an opportunity to receive. To be such special child of the lord almighty, one has to burden the responsibility for the entirety of their lives; a life spent in trying to redeem oneself.

It doesn't matter if your heart is in the right place or you thought that you were being extra cautious while handling the fragile emotions of those closest to you. When the time comes, the shock and hurt of being wrongly accused of doing something that you never even imagined in your darkest dreams, comes crashing down on you like a giant wave of numbness.

It makes me wonder - how can two people have such a different perspective of the same situation. I read once in a novel by a famous Czechoslovakian author, about how two people who went through an experience together in the past, have such varied recollections of the same. That is how our memory works -Two people cannot recall something in exactly the same way. There are bound to be differences. By the same stretch, I believe that the reason people recall things differently is because they feel differently at the very time that they are experiencing the event. It is this difference which manifests itself in the form of misunderstanding; of one party accusing the other of betraying them by not feeling the same feelings as themselves. The accused, left defending a lost battle. A battle that he thought he had fought in all earnestness.

Being misunderstood frequently also has a tremendous tendency to lead people to questions themselves. It makes one wonder if it is even worth trying to do a good deed or the right thing?Does it even mater which fork in the road you take? For each bend in the road will only bury you deeper in the murk of explanations that you would have to give to justify your path.

So what can one do? As someone who has spent a lifetime being misjudged by other people in every sphere of their life - family, friends, work - the answer is not as concise as I would have liked it to be. The answer is also not a simple solution outside of you that you can grab and hold onto and close your eyes wishing that all will be well hereon. Au contraire, the solution lies within.
Think of a situation where despite your best efforts, you are made out to be the villain and the saboteur. A scenario where despite your heartfelt pleas and vehement explanations, your supposedly positive actions are labeled vile and damaging. What do yo do then? How do you feel?

You know in your heart that what you did was for the good and if you wish to remain true to yourself, you would do the same thing again and and again... because your heart was pure.

It is into this very heart that you need to look in again to draw strength. The strength to pick your self up, dust off the hurt and shame and to try again. To be able to let out what is in your heart and to make the others see the truth in your actions and words. To be bolder and clearer to the world - both, in speech and actions. To not be thrown back once again in the shadows, covered by the misjudging gaze of the others.

For I believe that the good and the kind lord who burdens us with this mountain of misunderstandings to carry through life, also gives our shoulders the strength and our heart the courage to carry on. And hopefully one day, after a lifetime of learnings - of falling and picking oneself up - be able to lay down the mountain, stand up straight and walk on ahead with a light heart.

 

Thanks a lot Ladies. I really appreciate your taking the time out and reading my views. But more than that I am happy to have received 2 new approaches to handling things.. Thanks again!