How To Deal With Relatives Who Come After $$$ After Parents Death

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by SuiDhaaga, Mar 19, 2023.

  1. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga IL Hall of Fame

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    My Dad has heart operation on Wed, he thinks he won’t make it

    I make lot of mistakes (struggle with autism) and even relatives said to my Dad why is he taking so much care of me (birth mother. Is a nasty piece of work, typical Punjabi woman)

    I learned that without a Father in life, child is more likely to get sexually abused, killed etc

    now the irony is all these relatives who told my Dad not to take care of me and have his own life will now hound me like shameless wh0r3s for any $$$ once he is gone

    1. how do I block people from calling. Do I call the phone company and file complaint. Do I file restraining order
    2. How to handle these p1mps and baby killers calling from India


    People give me guidance so I can start researching


    I understand that 90% of worries never come true, they just take a far worse , ie unexpected form


    Years ago I had spat with American coworker (he was upset at me because I was bending over backward for my Dad).

    Then this coworker screamed at another co-worker “they (meaning, Indians, Arabs, etc) hate their own women”

    at first I thought this co-worker was full of s4it but as time goes by and I get all sort of of nasty experiences with fraud abusive marriage, greedy relatives, etc, I realize this person was right.

    that’s we we have indusladies.com, not indusgents.com
     
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2023
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  2. chanchitra

    chanchitra Platinum IL'ite

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    Block their phone numbers.
    Just concentrate on taking care of your dad
     
    Thyagarajan likes this.
  3. AppuMom

    AppuMom Gold IL'ite

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    Change your phone number and do not share with people who trouble you.
     
    Thyagarajan likes this.
  4. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga IL Hall of Fame

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    I do not shrea at all

    The problem is other toxic relatives will share our landline with others

    If someone calls I will just block -- will not give them time to hear their BS

    I am so stressed about the pre-admission blood test tomorrow. Just trying to get my ducks in a row because i dropped the ball somewhere.
     
  5. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga IL Hall of Fame

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    God no! I don't share. Other people share. Will have to get phone number changed somehow. Will see the process at work (because my job needs it on file) and other important places.
     
    Thyagarajan likes this.
  6. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    Don’t mix your personal life with work and don’t get into fights with your colleagues.
     
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  7. Swetha52003

    Swetha52003 Gold IL'ite

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    Sui, you don’t have to change the phone number for some nasty relatives. If they are in your phone contact list, delete their numbers and just block. If they are following in any other social media , delete those too! And delete them from your mind too :) If there is no form of contact, they cannot hurt you!

    They are people who don’t matter to you, whatever they say don’t hold any value! They are nothing !What matters is your dad took care of you and now you are taking care of him. May both of you be blessed with good health, lots of happiness and unending blessings !
     
  8. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga IL Hall of Fame

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    Goodness no. I meant if I need to change home number, then places like work, the utility companies, etc would need the updated number on file

    And last thing I want is fight with colleagues. Goodness no.

    This spat was with a colleague (20 years older, former military who traveled and likely seen the worst of other cultures) at a previous job more than 10 years ago. We were determining how to drive to a meeting. At the time I was poor at driving so my Dad wanted to take me.

    The co-worker said we should all go together. When I said my Dad will drive me the whole way he got upset at me and then told another colleague that "they all hate their women". in other words, he thought i was being harmed at home.
     
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2023
  9. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga IL Hall of Fame

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    Yeah, that's why I dont have social media (well I use FB to follow Dolly Jain and send messages to customer service for companies i purchase from)



    Even one of my aunts keep wanting to speak to my Dad. I say he is busy he is busy.. Eventually she stopped (knock on wood)


    I try to delete these people from my mind. My Dad got upset I dropped the ball and got worried all over again, wondering how I will survive without him.

    Thank you for your kind words and well wishes. My Dad seemed to calm down but I'm still reeling....


    When I asked my Dad about changing the phone number he said we have caller ID and voicemail, just don't pick up the phone.
     
  10. chanchitra

    chanchitra Platinum IL'ite

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    Don't stress too much. They will take good care here.
    Apart from the insurance stuff, the quality of medical care is really good in USA.
    If I may ask, what's the surgery that dad is going to have?
     

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