Harmless Flirting Vs Harassment..

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by anika987, Jan 24, 2023.

  1. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    They are not your best friends, not your brothers... Their families are not your priority. They are a bunch predators trying to prey innocent & naive women like you.
    They are waiting because they know clearly that you aren't sure of what they are trying.

    Not just you, many women aren't sure of what's happening to them. Blame their insecurity, lack of exposure, family background... You name it.

    These women believe men and their words.... Be it their compliments or their sob stories..

    You are not suppose to crack light jokes with men who sexually harass you. Don't call them friends or brothers, but treat them as harassers.

    The moment women realize all these, they will get freedom from such men.
     
    nandinimithun and anika987 like this.
  2. chanchitra

    chanchitra Platinum IL'ite

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    What's the update Anika.
    Were you able to draw boundaries with the men?
     
  3. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi..

    Actually I was contemplating on quitting..
    But one day one of the guys sent me small video clipping of me in slow motion walking..didn’t know when it was taken..

    I did not respond and completely stopped talking to them..

    I go to office,do my work and come
    Back home..only talk about work..

    they stopped messaging or disturbing me and talk normally but they are still all the time talking about women and how hot they are to others..

    Only thing am Still contemplating is though they do not disturb me coz I have gone quiet..is it worth staying in a place where men openly talk about women..I don’t know if it is common


    Also am the only Indian lady in my office..
    The older American ladies have no problem joining with the conversations..

    I personally never even had guys as friends..so it’s all a bit stressful for me..


    thanks for checking on me
     
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2023
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  4. lavani

    lavani Platinum IL'ite

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    i do not understand. what does mean. did they morph you in something inappropriate like photoshop. if my assumption is right, that is a by book Sexu.al harrasment.
     
  5. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    That was a mistake typo! Thanks so much for pointing it out..

    I wanted to write small or text messages something like this..

    he sent me a 4 second video clip of me in slow motion..tats what I meant..
     
  6. lavani

    lavani Platinum IL'ite

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    lol

    what kind of bunch of morons guys you have in work place. try to keep learning. network through linked in . jump ship the moment you get the right role or position.

    this org is just no go on long term employment.

    i have a lot of male friends in work. most almost 95% do not act like this. some are jerks. most are focused well in work. yes some close ones do make very funny jokes on me. like i got veg briyani today onsite. my tamil friend was telling about KAKA Biryani (run movie)
     
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  7. curlytweethere

    curlytweethere Platinum IL'ite

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    Anika you may be confused you may think about his wife, your female colleagues may find nothing wrong, your hubby may have confused you. Let it be as is but deep down listen to your gut feeling. If it says it feels wrong then none of the above matters. Listen to your gut feeling and take the decision
     
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  8. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks dear..

    Honestly wherever I have worked..I mostly do genetic talk no personal and focus on my work and go back home..

    I think workplace is not high school and talking about women like they are hot and sexy..it’s cringe to me.

    Today everyone was talking about some
    Young 20 year old and how hot she is.. an older American lady was also commenting on how pretty she looked..

    One of the guys is showing me her pic and telling me “isn’t she hot”..

    I did not even look and laughingly said” is a the talk always about girls ,girls and girls??”..

    I hate it when a man who is older enough to be a dad of a teen ogling at a 20 year old..

    Infact I feel bad for their wives..

    I understand we all look at people and once in a while and comment on their looks between our close people or friends..but not randomly in an office place!!

    I know I will quit sooner or later but just a bit more time that’s all..
     
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