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Why Are Men Such Toddlers?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rihana, Nov 21, 2020.

  1. Caughtinbetween

    Caughtinbetween Gold IL'ite

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    this reminds me that if H has to do the dishes he would promptly put used dishes in the fridge to be reused at least once more . would you believe it that he left undone dishes on the kitchen counter for 6 months till i came back from india ... for all that time he would only wash very few absolutely needed pots and left the rest as is on the counter . writing it here today seems kind of funny but i was so hurt back then and even now sometimes. this compared to when he would point to few dishes in the sink if we need to call building maintenance guys to get something fixed.
     
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  2. kaluputti

    kaluputti Platinum IL'ite

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    According to anthropologists,until approximately 12,000 years ago, all humans, male & female were equal and practiced scavenging animal remains that predators left behind and used mobility as a survival strategy. Then with the beginning of agriculture and difference in the 'natural selection' starting from food intake to 'differently abled physically, esp. for reproduction as well as due to the risks involved...females became gatherer & nurturer.

    They say that the sexual division of labor did not exist 10,000 years ago and developed relatively recently in human history, which they attribute to allowing humans to acquire food and other resources more efficiently, to preserve {happy) family culture. Then with the advent of socialism, equality, public rather than private property etc females started hunting too, sharing the responsibility. They are dynamic, evolved, in simple terms, mentally and pushing the limits physically.
    Now coming acceptance or/and doing something about it....the starting from the 20th century, modern female faces it both ways as startinganew has mentioned... moderate (accept) upload_2020-11-23_6-31-12.png and ( extremist... ) upload_2020-11-23_6-31-46.png ....!But we need to recognize the in-between upload_2020-11-23_6-36-31.png too..I mean the 'ranters' too:tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:..of course for their own reasons. providing opportunity for co-ranters...:sunglasses: like me, a great upload_2020-11-23_6-44-36.png stress buster.!
     

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  3. lavani

    lavani Platinum IL'ite

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    i guess i am lucky. my h was alone in us for almost 10 years, so he is kinda too independent does above stuff . i baby him sometimes. i noticed the kids who grew up here or stayed alone longer help in everything .
     
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  4. Metamorphic

    Metamorphic Platinum IL'ite

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    Manufacturing defect!

    No wonder, God thought "Its not good for a man to be alone" and made a woman. :rolleyes:
     
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  5. startinganew

    startinganew Gold IL'ite

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    What we need is the “art and science of running a home” - a mandatory course every year for children. Teaches children “how to adult”. The syllabus will be age appropriate and culturally-inclusive.

    Curriculum would include everything from maintaining social relationships, cooking, cleaning, maintaining clothes, parenting from nappies to clothes shopping to teaching adults kids to date responsibly, budgeting, etc. Choosing to have children will then me be a much more informed decision rather than - I am expected to do this next.

    I would have learnt so much from this^ instead of having to make all the mistakes. Yeah, society's assumption is that parents will teach you all this. They do try their best. But the expectation is not realistic. If one's parents are too busy working, are not aware themselves, and times are changing, or perhaps are rich enough to be able to delegate these life skills to others, etc. It's good to have the school curriculum include all of this.
     
  6. KashmirFlower

    KashmirFlower IL Hall of Fame

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    Our degree college had BA/BSc(Home Science). some took that subject, I didn't even had interest those days to ask what and all those subjects they read as part of it. I looked at somebody's home and the lady lately thought she can be home science lecturer in college. You are right, it should be a subject then only the work gets the value, and it is important to learn all those things by the time we start earning/make our own home.
     
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  7. startinganew

    startinganew Gold IL'ite

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    Yeah..home science is what I thought about too. And unfortunately the course had very low "social prestige". :pensive: (which shouldn't have been the case)

    exactly the *value* of this is key. it breaks my heart when a stay-at-home parent is frustrated at the lack of respect they get for what they do from even their own spouse and mostly from society. if people knew what all it includes, the respect would be earnest.
     
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  8. sanjuruby3

    sanjuruby3 Platinum IL'ite

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    My case is different. Yes I have to baby him all the time but he is not ready to accept or listen. Just like my elder toddler, he always spits 'no' or anger from his mouth when i say something. He thinks he knows everything and better than me in kitchen.
    Suddenly he got OCD about cleaning but his idea of cleaning is - do not make mess. do not use stuff. do not pee or poo. do not live in house.
    I have to leave my urgent chores to take care of cying kid o feed him . Be it once/year salon appointment or once/year doctor. I realized i ignore myself too much for kids and him but he won't.
    His urgent work is garden mowing that did not do for 2 weeks. He watch when he is in toilet, he watches when mowing, when doing dishes or eating. He also watches phone while watching TV. So he does only those chores that does not involve interaction with family.
    But then he goes to india, and sees there his own older brother always on his own tablet and kids always hiding in their own rooms with phones 27 X7 and minimal communication, he gets irritated but forgets he does same.
     
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  9. Hopikrishnan

    Hopikrishnan Platinum IL'ite

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    Aren't you are all ganging up to hang that ♿ "handicapped" sign on guys?
    Manufacturing defect -- is quite the truth. This is the reason for the shorter life-span of our species.
    And besides, in the minority of cases where the girl in his life disappears, he would surely wither, turn even more pitiable, and quit as well.
    It is a sad thing: born with defect and living handicapped. The only blessed thing that happens is the early departure of the lucky majority. :sleepy:
     
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  10. Urmila

    Urmila Silver IL'ite

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    This thread made me read more and I read about this neuroscientist review about some myths. Just shared.
     
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