No Luck With Job Search :(

Discussion in 'Working Women' started by anika987, Oct 13, 2020.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    I updated myself with many courses, fixed my resume and started applying from last year.

    Got few interviews but many did not work.Fortunately,got one job but she wanted me to come from 9 am to 5.30 with travel distance of 40 minutes for $10 per hour.My hubby was dead against it and felt I will become even more miserable coz he is unavailable to help coz of his crazy work hours,kid will find it tough,salary too meagre and literally he feels it is a desperate move right now.He feels the kid has to atleast be in middle school for me to work again for such long timings for a start with limited salary.

    Anyways I still try.Thanks to covid,everything took a toss.Tried for remote,nothing happening.
    They want me to be in person but hubby said that in our area schools are still in hybrid mode and kid will be home most days so he wants me to try only remote.Plus he does not want me to work outside this covid time.

    Again hell broke losetodau and fight escalated.

    He bluntly asked me" who are you trying to prove by getting a job?"

    For me..I am 40 now..by middle school I will be close to 45 with a 13 year gap in my resume.Who will give me a job then?Also,to start a 9 to 5 job at that age for small salary..honestly feels demotivated but I feel like I have no choice.

    Husband gets very upset with me over this issue.

    I am so scared guys..after my kid grows up,I will be free.what will I do in life?Though am happy now and keep busy with hobbies,housework and kid..after a while what will happen?Kid will leave home when am 50.and then what??

    I really want to do something in life.I honestly am an introvert in real life and to be a blogger,something to do with lot of people it is tough.let me be honest,Cooking and babysitting zero interest. I thought I will try something in fitness but husband is not encouraging and he says he knows he too well and feels my passion for fitness is different from taking it as a profession.

    It is one of those sickening days.

    MIL today who bluntly told me "Next year,no second argument..am coming to USA.I am bored being here in India.so you guys do not plan any vacation in summer .I am planning to come there.it is a done deal".

    I got so irritated and this is one of the reason I am desperately looking for a job.

    Another thing is am tired of my co sis who has a second baby (3 years old )and she keeps pricking me everytime saying that am done with kids,all the time free and how she is suffering with a small child and working so hard.

    just want to run away from all these people and hide behind a job.some money could be motivating.

    For me some job is needed to escape from reality.am desperately applying for jobs like that itself is a 9 to 5 job,calling up staffing agencies,nothing is working.

    how to even proceed? what is the next step?
     
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  2. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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  3. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    thanks Rihana:)
     
    Last edited: Oct 13, 2020
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  4. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    sometimes feels like..

    Can I do it?

    Am I capable?

    what if I fail?

    My relatives are waiting to see me fail.They will rip me apart if I quit or get fired.

    One or two jobs, I was fired from my job coz they felt I wasn't good enough.I do not blame them.I am a very slow learner.Many a times,things are in my brain but I "blank" out.

    I don't know why..

    so scared to take a full time,small salary and atleast if I did not have a kid..atleast can relax my mind and restart to try to next day.With a kid, if my job is not working for me..how can I bring the stress home?stress is my middle name.

    I am so scared and my heart races when I try for a job.but if I do not work,I will end up lonely..am not a smart woman and that is why I am scared to work.I am a very slow learner as I said and do not know how to overcome that.
     
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  5. AppuMom

    AppuMom Gold IL'ite

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    OP ,are you searching in the right platform ? Try flexjobs.com ,test.io ,usertesting club ,Enago etc
    I dont know your location ,but recently I am seeing lots of openings in insurance industry.Look for uw assistant roles.Sal is min ,but there is potential to grow.
     
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  6. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    When you have a job, you won't have the stress of "I don't have a job" so there will be some room for bringing home the job's stress.
    Yeah.. changing this part of one's name is not as simple as "get married." Takes a lot of reflection, taming of the mind, and thickening of the skin. Selective hearing in the ear (about others' comments) also helps.
     
  7. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    That's all? :openmouth: Thanks Rihana? :neutral: No "I would be happy to do the same for you?" :pensive: You break my heart. :disappointed:

    I guess I won't bring up some ideas that came to mind about job-sharing for the said open jobs.

    Though just in case:... I prefer to have Tue/Thu off.
     
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  8. cinderella06

    cinderella06 Platinum IL'ite

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    If you want to escape from mil and search jobs after she back to India you can try volunteering like in library and search job leisurely. After volunteering library may give you a option to work there.
     
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  9. Hopikrishnan

    Hopikrishnan Platinum IL'ite

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    May I offer an opinion from the "other" side?
    I worked because I needed the money. If my parents had left me enough money, I'd have studied something useless in college, and become an eccentric.
    People need the assurance of a steady income to go on with a confident mind. Perhaps the OP can figure out how secure she feels about her life (no need to tell us on this forum) and then decide whether or not to take a low-wage job.

    I see that the OP has been training for potential jobs. My advice to people trying to get back into employment after long a break of about 20 years or so, would be to get certification in some "hands-on" job. Not a white collar job. Train to be an auto-mechanic, or a plumber. There are Vo-Tech schools you can attend part-time, and there could be job placements. For engineering graduates from India, and women (there are so many single-women customers out there!) this could be a good thing. Everyone cannot be a Tesla mechanic right away and earn high wages; but you can be on the right track.
     
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  10. Ranchu

    Ranchu Local Champion Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Anika987,

    Sorry to hear what you are going through. Indeed the job market is less at this point. Hugs to you for keeping on with your search.

    I'd say, no matter how small $10 an hour is still good, you get $80 a day . It will give you experience.
    Another option I'd say is , depending on where you live , contact local recruiters like TEkSystems they usually have some starter jobs . It will help you validate your resume and get some interviews .
    Assuming you are trying some IT jobs, Try to differentiate yourself by participating in open coding challenges through TopCoder , it will add some credibility to your resume showing that you have not been completely out of touch from work.

    Ignore your co-sis. I'm hearing this from other friends too. They have 2nd or 3rd kid and then vent out about too much work. Its their responsibility as parents, no one forced them to have a 2nd kid. After having a kid one should not vent out or regret. That's awful.
    Just politely turn your conversation or just agree with her saying yes having just 1 kid is equal to you having 2 kids. Your kids are so well behaved , mine is an active one keeping me on my toes.
    Or just politely uplift your co-sis saying I dont have patience like you, you are amazing to manage 2 kids well done !
     
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