Quick Question About Success And Revenge

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by Rihana, Oct 3, 2020.

  1. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    There's a famous saying: Success is the best form of revenge.
    Or Frank Sinatra's version: The best revenge is massive success.

    I get the gist: Better to focus on your work, life and achieve something instead of plotting dark revenge strategies to get even with the offender or to teach him/her a lesson.

    The Quick Question:
    Does the saying prescribe that the success should be presented or conveyed to the offender? Or, is the success primarily for the offended party's personal satisfaction?
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    Last edited: Oct 3, 2020
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  2. Hopikrishnan

    Hopikrishnan Platinum IL'ite

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    The situation happens only when immediate payback isn't possible.

    The amount of time (blunts the sharpness of the need for revenge) and effort (offers lots of other useful lessons, and enemies on the way) involved in getting to that massive (is this to adjust for inflation?) success ends up making the revenge quite meaningless. Especially when the offender couldn't recall the details of the offense. Satisfaction from a life well lived should offer sufficient solace.

    Om Shanti Om.
     
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  3. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    That's true and sage advice. But the question is about what that popular saying means. Or what do people think it means.

    Providing some context so it doesn't seem like I am researching it due to personal interest... : ) My friend's child (high school senior) has got what she calls "mean, nasty, awful" teachers in 12th grade, and they are refusing to write letters of recommendation, and being strict about grades while not the greatest at teaching through Zoom. We told her, 'you have a good high school profile, with or without the letters and all that you will get accepted by good colleges. Getting there without the teacher's help will be revenge in itself.' The young lady asked us, 'what if the teacher doesn't get to know where all I get accepted." ; )
     
  4. geeta79

    geeta79 Bronze IL'ite

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    This is exactly in context with what Hopikrishnan has rightly said that showing off success to the offender when he has forgotten about the offense itself is meaningless. The young lady here can definitely somehow convey her sucess to her teachers, not to offend them(because after all we indians do consider our teachers as guru) but instead to make them feel proud about the suceess of their student.
     
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  5. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello:
    :hello: The answer lies with death of Great tall young Bollywood actor

    Sushant Singh Rajput was an Indian actor who is best known for his work in Hindi cinema. Rajput started his career with television serials. His debut show was Star Plus's romantic drama Kis Desh Mein Hai Meraa Dil, followed by a starring role in Zee TV's soap opera Pavitra Rishta


    Born: 21 January 1986, Purnia
    Died: 14 June 2020, Bandra West, Mumbai
    Height: 1.78 m
    TV shows: Pavitra Rishta, Kis Desh Mein Hai Meraa Dil, Zara Nachke Dikha, CID, Zee Cine Awards 2016
    Education: St. Karen's High School, Kulachi Hansraj Model School [Primary Wing], Delhi Technological University
     
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  6. gorgeous23

    gorgeous23 Silver IL'ite

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    Great question, in fact i myself have been thinking about this for some time due to some or the other reason.
    "The Quick Question:
    Does the saying prescribe that the success should be presented or conveyed to the offender? Or, is the success primarily for the offended party's personal satisfaction?"

    in my personal experience, telling the offender you have succeeded despite them may give some temporary ego boost, but beyond that it doesnt matter. if the other person was really that concerned with your success or failure, this question wouldnt arise. i mean we tend to think of ourselves as very important beings, as if the world really cares about our success or failures, it sort of gives us an air of importance, it inflates our ego. try telling the offenders u have succeeded, and they will shrug it off.

    success is more for my personal satisfaction, it has long term effects, the confidence that yes we can handle such non-cooperating people in our lives and still succeed.
    though of course this gyaan is looking at the incidents after they have happened, i mean hindsight gyaan. at that moment it hurts a lot.
     
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  7. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    :hello: It is always easier to become wise after the event.
    One executes work under tremendous pressure pulls and pushes much against negatives and enemies but auditors at their leisure point out easily deviation from rules or acts belated etc. enemies even work against success of others irrespective of the other proclaims success or not. It even provokes the enemies.
     
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  8. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Nice to read the opinions and they make sense too.

    But the question is about the famous sayings quoted in the first post. Do those prescribe that success should be conveyed to the offender or do they advice the offended to just focus on personal success. Dashed inconsiderate of whoever came up with those saying to not provide clarity about the course of action the offended should adopt.
     
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  9. Afresh

    Afresh Gold IL'ite

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    Well i think the answer's hidden in this one.
    But to be fair to the Offended party, it does sometime push you for your own good and makes the 'offended ' party realise their potential ( experience ;) )
    Honestly, that is when immersed in their own race to potential, when the 'offended' party has forgotten their purpose of embarking on that road to success and now completely unmindful/oblivious of the 'offenders' comments/life/negative feelings ( as they don't matter) can actually get the 'offended ' party at times to take notice of the new'offended' you :)

    I don't think i made complete sense there ... but hopefully the drift gets through
    As for articulation, I understand there is huge room for improvement.
     
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  10. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    You got me thinking... Now I think the answer is "it depends." Best explained via examples:

    In this case the success should definitely be flaunted -- If the offending party is an ex who left the marriage as some particular quality was (allegedly) missing in the offended party, then the offending party would do well to achieve some personal success related to that quality and flaunt it to the offender. : ) Say, a man leaves a woman as she is not good looking any more, or not intellectually his equal ... She mopes for a while, then, puts on her big girl shoes and goes about improving her overall self and that darned quality. Two or three years later they bump into each other at a dandia event where he can't believe the svelte belle dancing away in a low-rise lehenga is the one he so eagerly forsook. (Forsook is a word!!). He jumps adroitly from his revolving circle of dancers to the one she is dancing in. She turns with a raised dandia stick in her left hand, intending to meet the one in his right hand... then really looks at who is next to her.. the music seems to stop, Phalguni Pathak muted. Their neighbors bump into them, so they start to move again, silent yet the eyes asking and answering so many when/how/you! unsaid questions.

    Then, the DJ/compere calls out a pause in the proceedings.. just then svelte belle's love interest comes by with the masala chai and samosa that they proceed to have from one bowl and one cup.

    Dang.. story will have to wait. Gotta go. Just receive a late night work email.
    :lol:
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2020
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