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Relationship Turned Worst

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Independentgal, Nov 21, 2019.

  1. Independentgal

    Independentgal Senior IL'ite

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    Relation with husband have turned worst from last august.
    Argument between me and my husband turned worst in presence of in laws and hit me.
    I couldnt control my self anymore due to humiliation and I have complained to cops that day.
    Cops came and spoke with both of us and left.
    But husband have cut off communication completely with me but no fights since then.
    I am totally lost on how to deal with this situation.
    I had a second child in 2018.
     
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  2. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    Do both of you live in the same house.??
    You calling the cops was not wrong. Don't worry
     
  3. mangaii

    mangaii Finest Post Winner

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    I’m sorry you are going through this . Are you working ? How do you want to take this relationship forward ?
     
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  4. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    Which country? What did the cops say ?
    No communication since Aug 2018 ? or 2019?
    During the silent no communication period who is doing what within the household: expenses, chores, banking, child-care, and so on ? If the non-comm husband isn't present in your home, can you manage all of those on your own ?

    Give more details so that "how to deal with this situation" can become clearer.
     
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  5. KayKuyil

    KayKuyil Silver IL'ite

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    So sorry OP! Please share your info on the questions pp has asked.

    don’t feel guilty about calling cops. When a spouse can hit in front of other people, then there is no safe-zone in the relationship anymore. Are you financially independent? Does your family know? If yes, what are they saying? How is he with the kids? What about ILs? Do they ignore you as well?
     
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  6. Independentgal

    Independentgal Senior IL'ite

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    Yes I am working.I do want to continue my relationship because I dont want my kids to suffer because of decisions that I make. He uses me for money and doesnt give respect to me.
    Few months after our marriage in 2005 ,He stopped communicating with my parents and sister. That always bothered me a lot.
    So until sep 2019 I contributed to lot of expenses at home.But seeing his behaviour in the last few months after complaining to cops,I have decided to stop giving him money.My mom is here to take care of baby,this was scheduled before hitting episode in august. He closed the bank account that we jointly putting money to.
    All groceries,kids expenses ,my car bills,some bills which where depended on joint account are being paid by me.
    I guess he is paying mortgage ,utilities and his cars.
     
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  7. Independentgal

    Independentgal Senior IL'ite

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    In laws and my husbands extreme egoistic nature is ruining our relationship
     
  8. Independentgal

    Independentgal Senior IL'ite

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    He is taking care of Mortgage and few utilities .I take care of the rest.
    He was always in this travelling job so I was never counted him for chores.
    In general also he is not much of a helping person.He shows off outside helping people outside but does nothing at home.
     
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  9. Independentgal

    Independentgal Senior IL'ite

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    Since august 2019
     
  10. priyakannan

    priyakannan Senior IL'ite

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    Good thing is you are financially not depend on him which will make your life bit peaceful. When it comes to relationship try to make him understand kids shouldn't suffer, he also should understand it. At same time try to get some balance because your life also involved in it. I don't justify what he did is right but at same time give a decent try before taking a final decision because you should not regret in future.
     
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