How To Manage Expenses When Family Visits You?

Discussion in 'Travel' started by anivijay, Apr 2, 2019.

  1. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Have they booked tickets already? If not, can you call sis and ask her to split the trip and come later with her family? You can tell her that the amazing stuff you want to do with her won’t be possible with mom around. Mom’s trip is probably to stroll buckinham, go to the national gallery etc which her baby won’t let her enjoy anyway and she might have to stay home with him. It’s best she comes later and you guys can go together to a ton of places with a lot of walking around and seeing things that mom won’t be interested in. Come up with a list of things mom won’t want to do that you can do with her and won’t be able to if she comes along with mom.
     
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  2. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    I can understand your situation. You need not feel guilty. You can tell your sis to come after few months so that you can bond well with her
     
  3. anivijay

    anivijay Gold IL'ite

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    Thanks for all your replies. I am ready to discuss this with sister. But, my mom is not letting me discuss this, saying it would create misunderstanding. Another thing is , She is a school teacher and this is her summer holidays and she already got NOC from the office. If she postpones, she has to get another NOC with all difficulties again.

    My mom is taking care of her son. If I invite my sister now, she would come happily and go, but she won't let my mom come later, saying who would take care of my son.. But I really want to give my mom some rest.

    My mom and youngest sister already got visa. This sister's family is going to apply for visa this week. But she is not letting my mom to book the tickets. Mom is also not taking decisions firmly.

    What I can do now is, thinking how could I reduce the expenses now. Like taking packed lunches instead of eating outside, reducing no of trips , going by bus to London instead of train/ car like that. I told them clearly that they can not visit so many places. I'll try to give them a pleasant holiday as much I could..

    I am asking my mom to stay with me one more month so, I may have some time with her. But again, this sister has to agree.. :( . And she is known for her self centric decisions :(
     
  4. Afresh

    Afresh Gold IL'ite

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    Hey OP,
    The way i see it, your mom has to sort this out with your sister, when she wants to visit and whether she likes to have everyone around the same time that she's visiting.

    The only solution, could be that your mom can let your sister know that a trip with everyone to your place ,will put a financial burden on you and so it might be better for her(mom) to go first.
    Also, since sister has vacations then, if she wants to take a vacation necessarily that time, she may take a trip with minimum overlap time at your place and , she could go to some visit some nearby places with her family (husband and child) on her finances, so that there is minimum burden on you and your finances.
    That catch here is that mom should be conveying all this, keeping the best interest of both her daughters in perspective.
     
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  5. shravs3

    shravs3 IL Hall of Fame

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    Yes this is the best way. You can also directly tell sister that you are on tight budget so ask her to spend on trips as you can afford for all at once.
    Looks like your mom is being taken care by tat sister so she is unable to speak anything against her.
     
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  6. senorita2019

    senorita2019 Gold IL'ite

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    I have constant visitors to USA and with my hectic job, I politely tell I can take them to X, Y, Z places in weekends. Weekdays they can book a package tour online and go themselves. I give them the website, brochure etc. I also tell them to get enough currency and Visa credit card before coming.

    Since you are home, you can say something like - I can take everyone to X, Y, Z but other places pls feel free to arrange package tours in this website etc etc.

    You dont have to drain your money just because people invite themselves and disrupt your plan.
     
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  7. anivijay

    anivijay Gold IL'ite

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    I don't know, whether my mom understand the situation. I invited my mom , and I feel like I should not let her spend for sight seeings/ other stuff. But for this sister's family I don't know how to tell them. She was talking about exchanging money to buy stuff, I told her to check with travel agent and convert rupees to Pound. So that she can buy what ever she wants. So, kind of conveyed, that she has to pay for her shopping. For sight seeings , I guess she would think I would pay. don't know how to tell..
     
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  8. anivijay

    anivijay Gold IL'ite

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    My sister's family is staying at my mom's house and everything taken care by mom. Mom actually babysit her son. But somehow, my mom doesn't talk against her. because she would be the one to take to hospital if mom becomes ill. So, Sister and BIL dominates mom..
     
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  9. anivijay

    anivijay Gold IL'ite

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    This is what I need to do. Tell my sister to get enough currency. So, she can go on package tours with her husband. I already gave her hints like, if she gets a European visa, she can go on package tour with her husband while we can take care of the baby.. not sure, she takes the hint.
     
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  10. senorita2019

    senorita2019 Gold IL'ite

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    If she doesnt take the hint, she can sit at home and watch TV and you can cook yummy dishes. Dont stress out. People want a break from their homes sometimes. If traveling they should know what they want to do in vacation. Plan trips thats ok for you. Let her plan rest of it herself.
     
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