Feeling Depressed

I faced the exact same situation. My grandma died all alone while parents were away. For quite sometime I was tormented by thoughts of how her final moments must have been . But my belief in afterlife helped me get peace after a while. Now i believe she is Ina happier place and acts like my guardian angel. Read up on near death experiences , might help. Suggest a book by Anita moorjani .

 

Same situation but I am in the USA.
Grandma passed away and could not come due to
Personal reasons and until
Now my relatives taunt me how I was selfish and not missing my grand mom who doted on me...

But my love for grandma was real unlike the other relatives

 

Don't let people dictate what you should or should not do or how you are or feel. Don't compare yourself to anyone else. Don't let your relatives lay a guilt trip on you. In India people have the wrong notion that USA means everything comes easy and plenty of money. You barely find time and expenses are also high here with taxes and all different insurances. Your grandma knows and no one else has to know.

 

I too was not available when my grandfather fell seriously sick..and before I could visit in hospital he passed away..i felt so bad..
But what to do...these days so much uncertainty we can't predict when some elderly person gets health problem and breathes their last..some maybe healthy and no medical problem..but pass away in sleep also..
In such case apart from primary care giver who is Looking after the elder, all other family members can reach only after getting the news right...
But remember one thing, even if you werent physically present during the passing away of your grand mum, you both love each other a lot and definitely she would have thought about you during her last days..,maybe even last hours of life...her blessings will always be with you and she would be watching over you from heaven..

 

The last words my grand mom spoke to me even in her unconscious state was my name...

She kept muttering my name...

 

Usually grandma's and grandpa's have a lot of affection for grandchildren. Because at that age, they are the ones who feel good when they spend time with grandchildren, and we too develop a bond with grandparents. So, this in turn is making you feel guilty, which is quite natural. If you are not aware of this fact, this could turn to depression. to feel that way.

 

Well said. One thing i usually do during my vacation in india , is that if i know that if a elder relative is approaching their last moments, during my vacation i spend some time with them whenever i am near their place.

 

Making a priority to see your elder relatives is very important, especially, if you are outside the country. For one, if they pass away, you had a chance to be with them and talk to them and your elder relative had the pleasure to be with you and enjoy your company before their passing. You and your elder relative can cherish that memory. It is very meaningful to spend time with elder relative when they are still healthy and able to enjoy your company.

 

1) Write a letter to your grandma .... and express your thoughts ...

2) Visit an old age home and just speak to the people there / gift them anything ....

It really helps ..

Try it and let me know ... if its any good.