Sorry Long Post , Venting Out

enuf said already about your MIL.
The reason why you do all that to your MIL is because you are just a kind, and nice person. There is no reason why you need to be competitive with an older woman and be just like her. It is perfectly alright to be kind to someone who is allegedly unkind to us. This is called breaking the retributive cycle of being pissed off within a home.

Just go on being kind and nice.

 

Dear OP , As per your post, absolutely no problem with MIL. I dont know what more you expect apart from this.

She may be really not ready to climb . Keep the ego's/attitude aside and take your help.

As per me, you want to write /ventout some thing on MIL because she is MIL. Thats it.

 

@Ishaan10,

I know a person in your mil 's shoes. She says that she is too attached to the first grandchild and their attachment is mutual. But the ownership rights/decision making authority is with the dil and son. So, many times she feels like she is their maid. Therefore when the second grandchild was born, she didn't want to develop strong emotional attachment again. She does everything for the first grandkid due to the attachment and not ready to take on that kind of responsibility once again! Apart from this, she saw her dil's attitude over a period of time and now she wants to be detached.

In the light of the above example, even if whatever your mil does seem unfair from your and your second kid's viewpoint, it is fair from her POV.

Ultimately, life has to go on. You make some alternative arrangements to ease your life for now. Don't spoil your mind with negativity. Once your mil finds that you are positive and she is not taxed or blamed, she might soften her stand.

Take care, all the best.

 

morning was listening to radio and correlating your case .

For every solution we have , there is a problem from unsatisfied people.

 

You have to take care of your mom, dad and in-laws in their sickness . If it is a daily issue like chronic Illness , then u can hire help but otherwise we only have to do . It's our duty and humanity , we should not resent it . If you ahve not taken care of your mom in her sickness , then it is time to start doing from now .

 

Your kids are your responsibility not other people responsibilities. Women's are so independent these days. Not everyone is blessed with in-laws. Many people are raising their kids all alone.

 

If possible please get a baby carrier & they can be used till 3 yrs or so. I have seen many moms using brands like kolkol baby carrier , soulslings. Or you could get a baby swing & when you have to take bath, baby will be safe. Best Wishes.