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Relationship Hijack And Banter

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rihana, Sep 17, 2018.

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  1. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Six degrees of separation..

    Green eggs and ham????
    That other thread is making me want to watch this show just to participate in the banter, btw. Everyone who is a who’s who in IL is there. This is now making me very insecure.

    My insecurity let me to a deep and invigorating chat with another ILite today. After hanging up with her, I paused to think on Rihana’s now deleted thought process.
     
  2. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    Why did Rihana delete the post? I got there too late to read it.
     
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  3. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    I deleted post because didn't want to engage if any responses. Deleted a post after years I think, forgot to save a copy. LOL. Gist of post was:

    There is no such thing as total anonymity on the internet. We can use technology to guard privacy and cover some parts of our online footprint. But the volumes of information many of us share such as personal details (marital status, country of residence, area of work ...), opinions, feelings, past and current life events, make it not so difficult to find real identity. If a reader has the time, enthusiasm, patience and is savvy enough, he/she can find sufficient dots to connect and identify anonymous posters.

    Nothing to be alarmed about. More like something to be aware of and remind oneself now and then.
     
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  4. Amulet

    Amulet IL Hall of Fame

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    I don't want any for this. I jusht so wanted to say that to you, after you went on about "please god... don't let Amulet see this..yada.. yada..yada".
     
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  5. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    It is sad how many incompatible couples have been forced to live together because divorce is taboo.

    I know so many couples who would have been more peaceful seperately.

    Then we Indians like to talk like divorce is curse from the west.
     
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  6. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    @Rihana i tell that so many times..anon is a illusion. We have someone in the extended family who.had done a study on this as a part of his thesis. Dont mention things you won't want your family to know..
    Connecting the dots is so easy..infact have even hinted it to CE @ChennaiExpress ..
     
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  7. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    It is very true...

    More than that, it is sad to see how people are wired to accept these incompatibilities as normal in a marriage.
    As adults, we all understand it takes millions of compromises to live happily in a marriage life. The compromises could be of anything, but it is sad some women are expected to compromise their fundamental feelings (physical and emotional) in a marriage here.
    The people who stand up against in laws interferences, financial miss use, etc think issues like physical & emotional incompatibility is something not so serious.
    Sometimes I wonder whether these Lites are for real?

    What irritates me here is they way how they chose to give weightage to each and every issue here.
    When the thread was full of someone's frustration about physical and emotional incompatibility, the attention got diverted about my comment, where I mentioned something about conservative woman.

    Conservative means the aversion to change but follows the tradition no matter what. I see the OP of that thread is a conservative woman when it comes to marriage. She is not open for separation or divorce. Unlike some posters who disclose their EMA (emotional or physical) here for the fact of having zero marital bond with their spouses, Anika sounded traditional to me. Perhaps, she is modern in other aspects, like going for gym, yoga bla, bla bla... but the point here is about her marriage.
    And if you look at my response, you will understand that my point is not to challenge the modern woman, as if they wander outside for sex. If so, I would be the one to get hurt the more, as I am one modern woman.

    Just that people see what they want to see...
     
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  8. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    You are on a roll @Amulet. Are you a wolf in sheeps clothing out here to let us get our guards down?
    I’ve been here long enough to know handles. I know even people’s alter egos here. It’s such fun to watch what one persona is saying in one place and another one in another place.

    Sometimes when an old timer becomes the Phoenix, I decide to give it another try.

    I can sniff the he’s out even if they are disguised as she’s. I can’t for the life of me figure you out. Who are you?
     
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  9. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Do you feel better now? Having said jusht what you wanted to say? : ) BTW, thanks to Amica quoting your post in 'How did you come up with your name' thread, I read the thread and came to know about Amul-let, Om-let and the dash of goodness...
    Ayushmaan bhava... don't keep the butter out too long in the sun and make the ॐlet look both sides before crossing the road.
     
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  10. silentlistener

    silentlistener Silver IL'ite

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    Hi YM,
    It is another endless debate with no clear answers. I mean , having to tolerate the incompatible spouse for the lifetime , for the sake of keeping the home intact, whether it is recommended or not.

    No one can come to a consensus whether it is a melady or an asset ? Personally speaking, this principle is an asset to me ,because my father and mother have tolerated each other their entire lifetime. That is why my home was intact enabling me and my brother to grow up.

    That is also why I have an intact home even now to go and rest once in a year.

    True. Our Indian values teach something diametrically opposite to that of the West.

    Had my parents followed the principles of the West,(where it is believed that even nurturing children in a home where the parents are in disharmony is harmful), me and my brother would not have a home to grow up.

    It's a topic of another new thread. We will talk about it after sometime.
     
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