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Need Some Advice

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Sofiaj, Jul 4, 2017.

  1. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    I thought it is routine procedure for deed to have the names of both husband and wife.

    You've been married only 1.5 yrs. Not enough time for you or your husband to learn how to tell what and how much to whom. Next time, you know not to give direct answers to pointed questions. Say something like "will do whatever is best for tax purposes." And, you'll also learn to DIY when it comes to prayers.

    You mentioned TTC.. that is an even more Q&A prone process than buying a house. Suggestions, questions, and much more will pour in right from TTC to conception to pregnancy to delivery to first birthday. Learn how to deflect unwanted questions and comments. The best way is to deal with it right when the comment/question is delivered. Have a few ready responses: "But why?" "Why do you say that?" "Oh really?" "Nice to know" "That is a good point".
     
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  2. Sofiaj

    Sofiaj Senior IL'ite

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    Thank you so much:) Yes that's the best takeaway from that incident for us. Should filter the information which is getting passed on to them.
     
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  3. Sofiaj

    Sofiaj Senior IL'ite

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    I can feel your pain. I don't understand why parents have to ask such questions that would cause problems between their son and DIL on such joyous occasions. Your DH is understanding you now and that's awesome. It would be a great relief to have DH to understand our emotions.

    Thanks for sharing your views with me :)
     
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  4. Sofiaj

    Sofiaj Senior IL'ite

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    Yes, You're right. We can't learn much about how to handle the new relationships within this period of time. We actually informed my parents about the house first and they were so happy and enquired everything about the house to my DH and he was feeling very excited and I was so stupid to think that I would get something like that from my in laws as well if we inform them right away. To my surprise they didn't talk to me at all. Lesson learned in a hard way.

    I think the questions you said would come in handy for me on right situations in future. I'm so stressed about TTC process as well and that's causing so many problems with me physically, best thing for me to do let everything go and relax and enjoy the present.

    Thank you so much for your advice:) Really helpful
     
  5. Vedhavalli

    Vedhavalli Platinum IL'ite

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    They want to cause problems! So their son would always mom's boy
     
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