When Do You Want To Retire..

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by sumalynux, Mar 12, 2017.

  1. DDream

    DDream Finest Post Winner

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    :grinning: Thanks OP. Makes some sense.
    If one settle in USA, it is tough to do all these things, that easy, even if we go for a simple life style and have inherited property in India (not talking about billioners here, ordinary people). Have a great time
     
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  2. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    @sumalynux - Thanks for the tag! I've been a SAHM ever since I had my second child. I've decided to not go back to my old job unless there are pressing financial needs that outweigh my need to be a SAHM. Am I retired? Gosh no. This job is worse than the 14hrs days.
    I do enjoy all the perks of not working though. If we can pull on like this, then I will not regret not having a job. I'm hoping to get freed up a little if my son ever improves and requires me less. If that happens, I plan to work with special needs individuals like my son to improve their QOL. I want to go back to India to do this with a friend who has already moved back.

    I've learned to never make solid plans o to never say never. With my son, I have learned to go with the flow. I had plans of finally not working and "enjoying" my time with the kids. There are days I want to run away from all of the enjoyment though!

    From experience, I'd like to tell everyone working or not, parent or not, to enjoy your today. Don't put off enjoying until the money is made and kids are settled and parents are taken care of etc. That to do list is never ending. Keep working on it but live every day like it's a fun and stress free day.
     
  3. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    I have never had a serious career outside of home.
    Taking care of home and family has been my career.
    When my husband finally retires from a job ...i will will retire from mine.Wewill employ people to cook and clean and we will both indulge in hobbies full time if health permits.
    Husband will get a decent pension .We have ?a small financial retirement plan other than that.We also plan to simplify our lives and find happiness in simpler things .:)
     
  4. nuss

    nuss Platinum IL'ite

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    Glad to see so many like minded people. I have been working (not counting PhD) for a decade. I have a full time job on weekdays and full time parenting in weekends (2 kids under 5). I love my both roles. I took a break for 8 months after my daughter was born (I had signed the contract with my new university already so I knew I was going to work). No plans for retirement. If I wish I can retire whenever I want. DH's salary will be enough for us. In addition, I own a flat in India, have good retirement savings etc. but thought of retiring from the work that keeps me sane never crossed my mind.
    My father went to law school after retirement from his government job as a principal and practicing law now (he is 75 and well respected in his new profession). I love traveling and would love to make time to travel often and explore new places. So maybe at some point in life I will start using the summer break exclusively for travels.
     
  5. MNR

    MNR Gold IL'ite

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    More than a money, and being financially independent, its about going out and meeting people.

    It gives motivation and energy, will get to know many things. It may not be desk job, even pursuing hobby also , I want to be out of home for some time.
    Even though I have work from home option, I like to come to office , meet people.

    Dear OP, because your kid is toddler, he needs your 100% time you have this feeling. It may change in course of time.
    In my opinion, we would not able to retire from social life , that will lead to depression.
     
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  6. Lavanya30

    Lavanya30 Silver IL'ite

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    Hi Op,

    Nice thread, I am in the same boat, I worked for almost 14 years before having my son. Both of us decided (husband and me) that I call it a quit, the moment I conceived as it happened to us after a long wait, it's been 5 years now and my son is 4. People do ask me about getting back to work, but I just ignore that topic saying may be sometime later :) :). I do feel like Laks at times, I feel I am even deprived of the weekend breaks, but I am enjoying my time with my son and being home maker as of now :) :)

    I donot know if I can call it a break, but I have no plans to get back to my career as of now.
     
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  7. sumalynux

    sumalynux IL Hall of Fame

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    Same with me. I had my son after 6yrs of marriage with treatments... If I was in India may be I would have got back to job. But after coming usa , staying at home taking care of my son, dh I feel this life is not bad as I used to think..

    Now I feel scared to even think of getting back to job. I can't take that morning stress, arguments because of that, irritation and disappoinments of not getting help from dh, physical exertion end of day, no time to attend any functions. No time to take care of myself.

    When my mom used to say when there is no financial need why are you exerting yourself I used to say I can't just sit at home all day.. But after arrival of kid I am so busy even being home... Once he gets to school I am planning to workout, continue writing blog and stories.. clearly have no plans to pursue career atleast definitely not full time..
     
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  8. BeingSoulful

    BeingSoulful Silver IL'ite

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    Nice thread OP,

    My work & profession gives a sense of worth, sense of responsibility, keeps me on my toes, brings motivation & energy, makes me a better person in terms of confidence, learning & financial independence. And I love what I do. I don't have kids yet so its hard to relate to your feeling but i am sure its a wonderful feeling.

    I agree with @KashmirFlower , taking a break due to family is different and retirement is different.

    I always look forward for something to keep me going. For me retirement would be working for better and not for money or a career, I have great love for training, after I have kids who need my time to take care & nurture them I surely want to invest my time in more meaningful work that can bring peace within.

    Money surely plays a big role but its never enough. So, its completely on what you want from yourself & life.

    And of course I want to set the an example for my kids, to be more passionate about anything they do, to follow their heart & not let the responsibilities of a role take away their essence. After all its one "life"

    As long as you are contend in yourself with what you do, their is no age for retirement.
     
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  9. sumalynux

    sumalynux IL Hall of Fame

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    Mnr I never said about retirement from social life but from career and professional jobs...

    And this is my experience all my school college friends got limited to Facebook and watsup group.. And colleague most of them I maintained professional relationship, Never got too friendly enough to meet out shopping lunch out of office hrs.

    Where as my sil Sahm has tons of friends.. I Have seen her go shopping with her neighbor and celebrate festival and share food and stuff. And all her kids friends mommies are friends with her, they daily meet while picking kids from school, meet to celebrate kids birthdays taking them parks and stuff..

    So being social depends on person and doesn't come with going to work or being at home..

    Trust me if you had asked me same question I would have given bigger list of pros about going to job, but now priorities have changed that's all.. May be once kid is old enough to take care of himself I would do something part-time but definitely NO to going back to professional software engineer role which sucks 13-14hrs of days n sometimes weekend and regularly updating technical stuff, competition, politics in office...
     
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2017
  10. happygolucky22

    happygolucky22 Silver IL'ite

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    Very nice thread. I am not sure why few posters were mean and in debate mode to put you down for no reason.

    I agree working full time keeps me motivated energetic organized and I generally feel good about myself as compared to when I am at home, even working from home somehow dampens my spirits.

    Having said that, since now I have a toddler I would love to stay at home taking good care of him, actually being present in the moment with him and with my hubby and also cooking healthy delicious food, going on vacations. I am planning to take a much needed break from work for 1-2 years in next few months cause working full time for both us just feels like a rat race. Everyone is running to no end. My personal mental and physical health is also much better when I am at home as mind is relaxed comparatively to when I am working with zillion things to think and plan at all times. I think you have made a great choice of staying him with the kiddo to make some good memories and give him personal time and efforts. I still think of my maternity break whenever I close my eyes as they were the most precious moment I spent with my little one and have more memories from that time than the months that just flew by since I resumed working. wish you good luck and ignore the meanies on this thread lol :)
     
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