Why the call centre guys r paid so much for just being on the phone???? Take a look

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by VIJAYALAKSHMI06, Jul 12, 2013.

  1. VIJAYALAKSHMI06

    VIJAYALAKSHMI06 Platinum IL'ite

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    1 )Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
    Customer : "Ok."
    Tech Support :"Did you get a pop-up menu?"
    Customer : "No."
    Tech Support :"Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
    Customer : "No."
    Tech Support :"Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
    Customer : "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."

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    2) Customer : "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
    Tech Support :"Did you install the update?"
    Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"

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    3)Customer : "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
    Tech Support :"Tell me what you've done."
    Customer : "I typed 'A: SETUP'."
    Tech Support :"Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
    Customer : "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'."
    Tech Support :"Insert the MS Word setup disk."
    Customer : "What?"
    Tech Support:"Did you buy MS word?"
    Customer: "No..."

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    4).Customer : "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
    Tech Support :?!%#$ (welll pretend to smile)

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    5).Tech Support :"Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
    Customer : "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
    Tech support :##### ***

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    6)Tech Support :"What type of computer do you have?"
    Customer : "A white one."
    Tech support :******_____####

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    7).Tech Support :"What operating system are you running?"
    Customer : "Pentium."
    Tech support :////-----+++

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    8). Customer : "My computer's telling me I performed an illegal abortion."
    Tech support :??????

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    9).Cus tomer : "I have Microsoft Exploder."
    Tech Support :?!%#$

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    10).Customer :"How do I print my voicemail?"
    Tech support :??????

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    11). Customer : "You've got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print document, but the computer won't boot properly."
    Tech Support :"What does it say?"
    Customer : "Something about an error and non-system disk."
    Tech Support :"Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"
    Customer : "No, but there's a sticker saying there's an Intel inside."
    Tech support :@@@@@

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    12).Tech Support:"Just call us back if there's a problem. We're open 24 hours."
    Customer:"Is that Eastern time?"

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    13).Tech Support :"What does the screen say now?"
    Customer : "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
    Tech Support :"Well?"
    Customer : "How do I know when it's ready?"
    Tech support :*** ---- ++++

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    The best of the lot
    14). A plain computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.
    Tech:What's the problem?
    User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
    Tech:(keep quite)
    Tech:You'll need a new power supply.
    User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.
    Tech:Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.
    User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup and it will fix theproblem! All I need is for you to tell me the command.
    Tech support::

    10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.
    Tech support::(hush hush)
    Tech:Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our customers this, but there is an undocumented DOScommand that will fix the problem.
    User: I knew it!
    Tech :Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM <http://nosmoke.com/> at the end of the CONFIG.SYS. Let me know how it goes.
    10 minutes later.
    User : It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.
    Tech :Well, what version of DOS are you using?
    User : MS-DOS 6.22.
    Tech :That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't come with NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you the file. Let me know how it goes.
    1 hour later.
    User : I need a new power supply.
    Tech support :How did you come to that conclusion?
    Tech support :(hush hush)
    User : Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what you said, and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.
    Tech:Then what did he say?
    User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE.

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    Height Of all (Too Good)
    15)customer care officer:I need a product identification number right now and may I help u in
    finding it out?
    Cust: sure
    CCO:could u left click on start and do u find 'My Computer'?
    Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your computer?
     
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  2. siababa

    siababa New IL'ite

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    Re: Why the call centre guys r paid so much for just being on the phone???? Take a lo

    OMG TOOOOOOO good..... ROFL.... just can't control my laughter....
     
  3. ASHWINRAJ

    ASHWINRAJ Gold IL'ite

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    Re: Why the call centre guys r paid so much for just being on the phone???? Take a lo

    LOL!!
    He he he. . .
    Hilarious!!
     
  4. VIJAYALAKSHMI06

    VIJAYALAKSHMI06 Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: Why the call centre guys r paid so much for just being on the phone???? Take a lo

    He he he he
    Thanks Siababa!!
     
  5. VIJAYALAKSHMI06

    VIJAYALAKSHMI06 Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: Why the call centre guys r paid so much for just being on the phone???? Take a lo

    Thanks Ashwin
     

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