God Forbid

God Forbid​

Marriages are made in Heaven but prenup agreements are made on earth with the help of lawyers. They convince the couple, God forbid, What if the marriage does not run, then what ?
So a pre nup agreement is made, which decides how the marriage will run, who will contribute what for the household expense, and in case of divorce, who gets what. So if one partner is rich, if a prenup is not made beforehand, then half of the estate of the rich partner goes to the other one.

So without a prenup effectively it means, as u say at the marriage time “ I Do”, it means u do agree that from that date onwards, u are worth half of yr amount, plus u have to give a monthly maintenance towards the future kids and the ex spouse, who is yr current wife now.

Since yesterday there were no papers, I was bored so went to the internet, and was browsing around , when I came across this interesting subject, and it set me thinking really about what is life, and marriage. That how expensive it is to marry really at times, for these rich people. I will give u a few examples , to show u how it goes abroad and how it can soon be a reality here.

Some of the most bizarre prenup agreements , u can read here as follows

Ten Craziest Prenuptial Agreements | Wedding Planning, Advice & Etiquette
The Hollywood Actor Micheal Douglas had some strange clauses in his prenup.
6. Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas
Next in the “making marriage pay” category is Catherine Zeta-Jones. Her prenup with “Wall Street” star Michael Douglas entitles her to $2.8 million per each year the marriage remains in effect. When Zeta-Jones was asked about the agreement she had the following to say:
“I think prenups are brilliant,” Zeta-Jones chirps in the January issue of Vanity Fair, admitting that under her prenup with Douglas, “I get taken care of very well.”
And it also says that for each time MD is caught cheating, he will be fined 5 million dollors, rather than a divorce, for staying married is lucrative eh !
On one hand women want to be equal to men, and on the other hand, they want a hefty compensation in case of a divorce ? As it is , they take away half of the man;s wealth as soon as they marry, and then monthly alimonies start too. I would say pretty expensive to get married abroad.

So in these prenup agreements, u limit ur losses to what the lady agrees to sign before she marries u, and u need a smart lawyer both sides to get yr good pound of flesh !!!!!

In india the haggling does happen at the time of divorce, but since we have a lot of black money here, it is very difficult to prove what is the actual worth of the man. And when the son stands to inherit property from his parents, it is not his still, what can the lady ask for from his future inheritance, which he will surely inherit, but only when the oldies die.

And there was this lovely case recently on which I had blogged on, of a lady she took Rs. 1/- as alimony, so that it is on record of the courts that she got her alimony from her husband, and she did not want anything more as she said she was earning good enough.

When I got married , we were both broke, Dad helped us make this house, and he gave us capital to start our exports. When the good times came, Harsha was the proprieter of the export firm, and so today most of the money is in her name. So god Forbid, it anything happens, she will have to pay me alimony, so that I can drink beer and eat fish whole day eh ! Law is law, the poorer of the spouse gets the alimony eh ! HAHA

That is why I am careful not to annoy her, for she has the upper hand, and then again I think at this age and the way I look, which babe will take a second hand me eh ! So with those thoughts in mind, I behave myself !!!!

Not a bad business to be in , hobnobbing with the rich and the famous, and getting good fees, maybe I take this hobby as a profession, and become a percentage lawyer, taking a percentage of what I help recover for the poor supposedly rich divorcees , what say !!!!!!!
And if the judge asks for the reason why my ;lady client wants divorce, Mother in law is the best excuse, but if she is dead, even then kamalji can come up with an ingenious one, that her ghost comes to haunt the poor DIL, and hence she wants a divorce !!!!! After all, my percentage too is at stake eh ! Ah so much money to make, and so few years , let me get cracking.!!!!!



KAMAL MAHTANI

I have made a few mistakes in my life, thank God none of them call me DAD !!!!!



HINDI SONGS AND THEIR MEDICAL INTERPRETIONS

Fever – Jiya jale Jaan jale ,Raat bhar Dhuan Jale
Constipation – Suhani Raat Dhal Chuki, Na Jane tum kab aogi !
Cataract- Tujhe mein Rab dikhta hai, yaran main kya karoon !
Alzameirs - Tujhe yaad na meri aye, kissi se ab kya kehna !
Vertigo – Tan Dole mera Man Dole !
Urinary infection – Tip Tip Barsa Paani, paani ne aag lagayi !
Piles – Batana bhi nahin ata, chupana bhi nahin ata !

Ipossible Wish

I want to see Manmohan Singh speaking to the wife of Salman Khan, on Sachin Tendulkar’s retirement party !!!



Nurse – Sir, your wife’s phone.
Doctor – What is it.
Nurse – She wants to kiss you
Doctor – im busy, cant u see, u take it and give it to me later !!!!!!

A person who believes in working, will always have a job.
But a person who thinks “kaun kare” (who will do this ), will always be a boss !!!

 

Dea rAruna,

Today with both working, why should alimoney be given to the wife ? laws favour u women, as it is, one word from u and the men are behin d bars.HAHA

The problem is the hubby shpould have the money to give his wife eh ! Does this mean hubby buys the wife, if he gives her a amount before the marriage ? HAHA

Regards

kamal