1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

Forced to pierce the nose!!!Anybody else???

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by shakambari, Sep 5, 2009.

  1. chaand

    chaand New IL'ite

    Messages:
    11
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Female
    I don't have nose pierced but my FIL wanted me to do that...but I didn't get it done. After my parriage my MIL said why don't u have ur nose pierced..I straight away said I don't like it and my DH was staring at my face as to why u replied back my mom..as he is a mama's boy...and I gave him a don't care look. Sometimes u shud just stand up for urself otherwise people just walk all over u.
     
    3 people like this.
  2. kainaath

    kainaath Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    250
    Likes Received:
    7
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    52
    hi Shakambari,
    i recently got engaged and its one of the customs in my side of the family to get the nose pierced....its so called the signs of being married just like wearing a mangal sutra.
    when i was asked by the elders women in my family as to why havent i done it yet....i put my foot down saying it is not written in any HOLY BOOK.
    i personally think its about time to change these traditional customs which have been there for over the years.
    Thankfully my Dh tobe understands these things and doesnt force me to do any outwardly things.....
     
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2010
    1 person likes this.
  3. parvathi1980

    parvathi1980 Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,137
    Likes Received:
    1,307
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    hi, actually in my community it is not compulsory to get one's nose pierced. But my MIL wanted me to wear lots of bangles. i refused and she is angry with me for that till 2day...she herself wears atleast 9 bangles in each hand and thinks she is extremely fashionable:rotfl
     
  4. sowmyar

    sowmyar New IL'ite

    Messages:
    67
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    8
    Gender:
    Female
    Oh well, the miseries of piercing your nose. I will admit I too faced this, but unlike in-laws in this case it was husband who wanted me to. I was pretty clear from the start that a nose pierce was out of question since I know it will never suit me. But obviously this did not deter hubby one bit, he would suggest I try one of those stick on thingies and send him photos so HE could judge whether it looked good or not (as though that was the only thing that mattered) - he would emotionally try to move me, can't you do this simple thing for me, marriage is understanding each other's needs and desires etc. I usually laughed away such senti talks and finally guess he got the message. Funnily though he NEVER wanted me to pierce my ear, a second time, I mean to wear a second smaller earring. I always wanted to but never felt I could bear the pain, and he was adamant I don't do it. After 3yrs of marriage I worked up the guts and had it done hoping he will like my new look, but he now is not too happy about it. Oh well, anyways I did that because it pleases me, no regrets there!


    Oh, wearing bangles is considered NOT fashionable??! I think it really depends on your overall attire. To me bangles can make a look traditional or fashionable depending on what you team them up with - chunky ones for traditional wear, and slender, bracelets, and colourful or square ones for western wear. JMO
     
    1 person likes this.
  5. parvathi1980

    parvathi1980 Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,137
    Likes Received:
    1,307
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    JMO __________________

    Yeah u r rite...Actually to be honest i hate this display "i m married nd see i am wearing red bangles or maang mein sindoor or mangalsutra" on a daily basis...personally i find these customs irritating...don't mind on occasions! No such rules for men though...no sindoor or nose ring or anything to flaunt the fact that they r married!
     
    1 person likes this.
  6. Msoma86

    Msoma86 Junior IL'ite

    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    10
    Gender:
    Female
    Yes
    i somewhat agree with you. But it has merged into our culture just because most of us even today like to feel insecured. The moment one gets married she tries to claim security.

    Yes these are old thoughts which ultimately boiled down to rituals / cultures / customs / etc etc .

    But what do you say when unmarried girls follows these ? Is then only culture / etc etc , I dont think so , its somewhere related to fashion / trend / etc

    Sorry for the GYAN

    Bye
    Soma
     
  7. Ushie

    Ushie Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    176
    Likes Received:
    6
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi,
    Is there any custom to pierce groom?. I knew in coimbatore sides, they will put metti on groom's toes on marriage day:)
     
  8. Msoma86

    Msoma86 Junior IL'ite

    Messages:
    84
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    10
    Gender:
    Female
    No I have not heard of this
    Its always women who passes through these rituals I believe
     
  9. rms1

    rms1 New IL'ite

    Messages:
    67
    Likes Received:
    4
    Trophy Points:
    8
    Gender:
    Female
    She did want to have it dine on the first place-

    She felt it is being imposed on her without her consent

    and the boy did not react to her protests at all...

    [/QUOTE]

    Same thing happened with me too. Forced to pierce and no reaction by ex and top of tht my own mother said you hv to listen to them as all married girls has to wear nosering. I too didn't wanted to get my nose pierced. But after my engage ex-MIL told mom tht she has to get it pierced as it is suhag ki nisani and if she dont do it ppl will talk and badmouth behind back blah blah blah. Though she was the biggest liar in this matter she wasn't completely wrong. In our caste some older ladies are really nosey and they do badmouth abt someone even for such silly matter. The place whr (ex) inlaws were staying, in the same area so many ppl of our caste were also staying, even you just go down to market just to buy vegetables you will surely meet few ppl on road. so she was worried. I just dont understand why such loser ladies, society neighbours or relatives has to worry if I wear or don't wear nosering or whtever I wear. Why do such ppl hv to poke thr noses in other lives whether wht they do and wht they wear and wht not.

    My nose skin was too thick I tried to get it pierced but it was paining so much. I thought if I will pierce now and if septic will happen it will look too bad during marriage so I decided to pierce after marriage. Ex MIL made it a big issue and abused me for this silly matter.
     
  10. emma83

    emma83 New IL'ite

    Messages:
    26
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    8
    Gender:
    Female
    Even before our engagement, my to be MIL forced me to pierce my nose and she heard a straightforward NO from me. Of course she put up a long face for months and was not talking to me at all. But who cares?!
     

Share This Page