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Mad(e) for each other

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by mathangikkumar, Mar 19, 2011.

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  1. mathangikkumar

    mathangikkumar Platinum IL'ite

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    Ah, what a wonderful pair!!

    This is one type of reaction when we attend a marriage reception, and it automatically comes out from our mouth.

    Some do make a really made for each other in complexion, height, build, overall personality, but some it will make you heave a sigh,’ oh God!’.

    I remember, once there was a person who had a love marriage, hosted a dinner party for his colleagues. Many at least a 10% people who attended did not take part in the dinner, just handed over the gift after a brief hello. They skipped the dinner. The reason was simple, though it was a love marriage, whoever came out said,’ Love is really blind!’

    The groom really looked like a prince charming with a beautiful height, wonderful complexion, and sharp features. Next to him was the look alike of Shiva Dhanu [those who know the suicide killer of Rajiv Gandhi] no way a match for him, she was short, dark and with the teeth seen. Many could not digest the love pair as for them they are no match in any way.

    Some later expressed their opinion that his parents did not approve of his choice, for that matter anyone who could have a common sense and sensible would have thought for a second before deciding. I am not sure till today whether he had any visitors at his home after marriage, whether they are happy even now.

    (I would like to clearly say one thing that I am totally not for any caste or colour, but when one chooses one should also see to some extent the overall
    impression he / she is going to present.)

    You can quote Amithabh- Jaya jodi, Rajnikant-Lata, for contrast, MSS –Sadasivam for proper match.

    Normally for the Amithabh type we call ‘guilly –danda’, for Rajni type-‘pachcharisi-ellu’, for MSS type ‘deiveega’ Jodi.


    Coming to the offspring, it is strange and funny to see them. They may be a combination of both or only one. Sometimes one gets the complexion but a dull face, the other may be dark but with good features. God is great; He creates with some kind of balance in them. Some resemble exactly the parents and you do not have to swear to vouch for their birth.

    As per my daughter, it is always the second child who is fairer than the first one, she had taken a survey with the family and friends circle. Her bad luck in my house it is the other way around, with my son fairer than her. One cannot call her dark but wheatish. According to her a boy does not need to be fair.

    Finally, at the end of the day it is the quality of the spouse which is going to help in the harmony of the family.
     
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  2. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    dearr mathangi,

    i was left a bit confused about your message. on one hand you say one should think a bit when choosing a spouse.

    however, in your last sentence, you negate that.

    i strongly disagree with your first statement. i really don't think it is anyone's concern how the couple looks together. why should a couple concern themselves with other people's opinion of them in the physical sense? it is entirely upto them and them alone. after all they are the ones living together. it is important that they should be compatible in the true sense of the word meaning their mutual interests, basic principles in life and love for each other. physical looks are transient. a handsome person may be rendered invalid or physically handicapped in the course of time. physical attractiveness may vanish. what should they do then? what will the same "society" who called them "made for each other" seeing them at the reception "say" about them then? and more importantly, should they leave each other just because they do not "look" good together?

    as for these people walking out of the reception after giving a gift, without participating in the dinner, well i would only say - if this is the way these so called "good looking", "made for each other" visitors behave, then it is better not to be like them, and i feel sorry for the people who wasted their time, money and effort on inviting them for the wedding. they do not deserve to be invited anywhere. before judging the looks of others, let them take a look at themselves in a mirror and judge their own behaviour. disgusting is the only word i can find to describe them.

    on the whole, i was really pained to read this post. there are many such "mismatched" couples who have lived long, happy lives with each other. there are many very good looking couples who do not last together even for a few months, leave alone years.

    isn't it high time our society changes its outlook and stopped thinking so superficially? we are a people who claim to be very spiritual and philosophical. is this what we mean by those two words?
     
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  3. kAlyaniShAnti

    kAlyaniShAnti IL Hall of Fame

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    I did not get a head or tail of the post. Is it your opinion or you are looking for other's opinion?
    Also there are contradictory statements in the post.:bonk:bonk:bonk
     
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  4. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    I would just say beauty lies in the eyes of beholder. As long as you have love for each other, That will make a successful marriage
     
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2011
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  5. Spiderman1

    Spiderman1 Gold IL'ite

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    Same here, kalyani
     
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2011
  6. kma

    kma Gold IL'ite

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    Dear,

    It is sometimes due to jealousy also that people comment nonsense. They may not have been able to digest the good luck(according to them) of the girl to get a better looking husband. Whom one marries is nobody's business but the couple's own.

    What is more important for a marriage is compatibility and understanding between the couple. Ok maybe sometimes we may feel that they could have gone for a better choice. But there ends the matter. What is this nonsense with skipping food and all? Dont the guests have any manners?
     
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  7. srajitha

    srajitha Silver IL'ite

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    I didnt like the idea of outer beauty here. So what if the groom or bride is not good looking or both of them are not good looking its no where concerned to us , Are we the people who are going to stay with them and look at them all the time ???? .All that matters is the love & understanding between them. THAT's ALL.

    I strongly believe in inner beauty , no matter how beautiful ,or ugly or OK you look your heart should be good , else its of no use...
     
    Last edited: Mar 20, 2011
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  8. justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    Mathangi ..So whats ur point?
    A pretty guy should get a pretty girl (according to ur standards ofcourse..not the couple involved) and an avg/not good looking one should get similar spouse...
    One of the most narrow minded opinionated posts I have seen to date in IL. If this is a troll please do not waste our time
     
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2011
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  9. mstrue

    mstrue New IL'ite

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    Mathangikkumar,
    With great difficulty I digested your narrow thoughts.
    Wish your daughter has the commonsense and maturity that her mother ought to have, and respects/values herself and others for what they are than how they look.
     
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  10. asuitablegirl

    asuitablegirl Gold IL'ite

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    You know, there is something called INNER beauty too, and I feel it matters a lot more than OUTTER beauty.

    Today my dh thinks I'm the most beautiful girl in the world. But what do you think I will look like 40 years from now? Maybe my skin will be dull, my hair will be gray, I have always had a few crooked teeth so maybe by that time my teeth will show too. I will probably be either too fat or too thin. It is with great sadness that I read your post, knowing that as each of us walks through life, there will be people like you critiquing appearances.

    I don't agree with you or those people's view of beauty. My dh has the roundest nose ever but I feel it is a beautiful nose and would be happy if my kids inherited that feature from him. Why? Because when you love somebody, like how that guy loved his wife, you are HAPPY to see your spouse's features in your child. It is called 'LOVE'. And can we all please move on from this 'dark' thing?? It is too ridiculous. Indians are a bunch of brown people fighting over who is more brown and less brown. HELLO wake up! We are all within a few shades of each other! To me the definition of fair means... white skin, blonde hair... does that sound like you? Because it sure doesnt sound like me. Let's just accept that as Indians, we have brown skin and black/brown hair, and move on from it. Judging another Indian for being too 'dark' is like the pot calling the kettle black.

    :bonk It's called BROWN!!!! WE ARE ALL.... BROWN! She is not 'unlucky' just because her skin color is not up to YOUR expectations!

    And just for the record, in that guy's eyes, his wife is probably one hot lookin lady! Anyone who left that party suggesting otherwise is just plain RUDE.
     
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