Dear I-lites, With no offence to anybody I have taken up the cause of children who spend most of their days in Child care centres with joint families having become non-existent and women becoming career-oriented! Ofcourse, I wouldn't like to put all the blame on women alone since with growing number of women taking up jobs, the government and the private companies should chalk out ways for women to work from homes, what with most of the jobs being done through computers, at least for young mothers. If nothing is done immediately, the generation next will be a disgruntled lot! I welcome I-lites for their opinions on this problem in society. Women of Today! Women of today are a lot more free! Lots of time to spare- with machines for all and sundry! Grinders do the grinding, dishwashers take on utensils, washing machines wash the clothes And microwaves make cooking a trifling! Work at home getting easier, Women are opting for a career. At last women are finding their freedom! A freedom lost down the ages! If money in the hands does free them Then three cheers to womens' freedom! We have avenged the misdeeds of the past! We can no more be just door mats! The taste of success seems so sweet! Like a hungry beggar's who's served a treat! But Alas relishing our success- Have we hardened our hearts? Alas, There are yet no machines to replace the love of a mother! Six months to six years Or even more older thriving on borrowed love In the day care centres and creche! Let's remember dear women- As adults, we have a choice. But the tender little sprouts, They have no choice till they bloom! And if this trend to continue, Let there be no regrets! For- As we sow, so shall we reap!
hi malathi This one is coming just from your heart to mine..a cause so dear to my heart...this was one of the reasons, I opted not to go for a job and even during pressing times have never regreted it.... I think we cannot ask this generation questions about leaving parents in old age homes if they were left in creches and baby cares right..... We are surrounded so much by machines, are we also becoming one ...losing all humanity...not only in the case of children... this particular issue leads to problems in discipline, studies and lot of other things... how i wish for the old joint families..so that a child can be a child...enjoy life as a child... again this is my personal opinion.....
Dear Shanthi, Thank you for the first response. This thing has been pricking me right from the days of my childhood. My mother had taken up a job when I was in my 6th or 7th class and my youngest brother was ,may be in the 1st or 2nd.That decision of my mother may have been to make two ends meet.May be that is the reason why today I am having a wonderful life and my brothers are well settled too.But deep in our sub-conscious minds,there has a been a nagging feeling that our children should not go through this.As I have written in my poem in the last few lines, as parents we always have a choice but the children are dependent on us till they are able to manage themselves. And how do they manage themselves? Is it inborn quality? Certainly not! Even we see the father and mother birds teaching their young ones to fly.Till then they make a lot of sacrifices. We have to learn a lot from nature. Even detachment, we have to learn from them. Once the young ones are able to manage on their own, then the protection is withdrawn and the parent birds go on with their next venture of building a new nest!When creatures with 5 senses can sacrifice so much, why not we, who are born for the purpose of spreading Love? I am not against women who take up jobs for making ends meet. But I feel even they can, to some extent plan to take a break when they plan to bring in a kid into this world-for THEIR SOLE Pleasure. The child had no role in it at all. So why should it suffer?
very true malathi, your article is something that nagged me too for a very long time your line We have to learn a lot from nature. Even detachment, is very true, but i had been a homemaker but earining with many things like sewing knitting painting, selling products, silk sarees, thanks to my hearing impaired loss but was always available not only to my children but also to my sis children who came to my mom for day care..and this is what i wanted sathya to pen in her poem, instead of athai adichalo....i wanted her tostart with yaradichi nee azharaey kanney nee kannurangu, velaikku sella venum adai nee arivayo...but in english as many dont follow tamil or hindi here..very nice write up..sunkan
Hello Sungan, I hope you read my poem too, not only the reply to Shanthi's Fb. As you know,the Trust in which I am an office bearer, is running a Creche.Due to meetings and other work, the mothers are somtimes held up till late hours and our creche closes at 7.15 sharp but the staff there is forced to stay back for the sake of the child whose mother is late. The excuses they give us inspired me to write this poem. My heart cries for those innocent children having to go through all this for no fault of theirs. How are preparations for your daughter's marriage going on?
first nichyathartham, after the diwali, but my to be son in law seems very shy to talk, but i know once giri comes all will run fast...a man who can gift a cell for birthday even before he sees her just made a judgement with the photograph should have something up his sleeve...i will update as it progresses...while on ur poem it is very heartening and i know what u have written, feel it too..sunkan
Hi malathi, I agree with you. I would only request you to say child as her/him..or let us say his in the common way..not it...(i can't think of a beautiful human as a it..) hope you agree with me...sorry if i you feel i am crossing the limit....
Hello Malathi This is so true and so beautiful. Let us not regret. That was the reason I never took up job and loved to be a housewife. Today I am proud that I am a housewife. As I have all the time in the world for my family. yeh did somework from home might have not earned much but still it is ok. As money is not everything in the world. Do you know there are some house wife's who leave they kids in the child care just because they want sometime for themself, I get very angry with such ladies. keeping kids in the Creche is a fashionable, prestigeous. I feel sorry for such kids. Your poem is marvellous thanks u so much. Love is not for sale nor anyone can borrow. Yes we are paid tomorrow with what we do today. yeh pyar tu lajawab hai tujasay kohi nahi takkar laga sakatha hai
Mom, All those feelings which I have mentioned were that of my childhood days.A child does not understand the difficulties of running a home. He/she (I do not want to offend Shanthi by referring the child as 'it'! But a child being a neuter gender, I used the pronoun 'it' more for the sake of grammar than any other reason.) does not know about parental problems of running a home on a shoe-string budget. The child expects only one thing, the mother to be available at his/her beck and call. This poem is meant for those mothers who have taken up a career not due to money constraints but because of their ambitions such that they are not able to take any thing that comes in the way of their goals, what even if it is their own child. Mothers who take up a job to make ends meet are full of guilt and shower their love on their children whenever they are available to them. I know of mothers who, even when at home chase away their kids to neighbours houses to catch up with the sleep that they have missed due to work-load at office. Such mothers show their affection with material things whereas the young child seeks only her love. Slowly, the child gets used to the materialistic pleasures and grows up without knowing mother's real love.And such kids are a threat to society since they easily fall prey to bad habits and wrong ways. We have all realised your sacrifice and my poem that I had dedicated to you on your 70th Birthday would reveal my heart to you. I would like to reiterate again and again that whatever we are today is because of your sacrifices and nothing else. Love, Malathi