Life is a curse for me.

What do you want? Do you want to end this mess & live happily with your husband? if so, do below. If not, then you are on your own.

There is only one solution: spill everything to your husband. Not in a 'oh, I am telling this to you for jusy FYI' hot headed egoistic manner. But in a 'want to come clean to you, tell you some mistakes I have hid from you' way and ASK him to help you & protect you. Get rid of your ego & pride (suck it up) and fall on your knees and hold his feet when you ask him (this part works wonders with men). Tell him that you are ashamed of your past, regretted & now heavily repent what you have done and want to end those mistakes by coming out clean to him and the only way you can put an end to that mistake is through his help.

 

[JUSTIFY]

Hey aditya.... this girl didn't show any sign of pride or ego. In fact in the whole post we can find only...guilt fear pain .... So saying leave all your ego and pride might not be apt . Whatever is her past...she might have done some part knowingly...some unknowingly...She is already in pain...why to hurt her more by saying these[/JUSTIFY] <input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden">

 

Wow. Just.... wow.

If I were you I would have told that cousin, "Yes I had a boyfriend but we were never intimate. It was a quick puppy love romance and is NONE of your business anyways." Then I would have gone home and told your husband the truth about your past (but not in so much detail) and told him the cousin is trying to blackmail you.

I can't believe you had sex with the cousin!! Where is your sense of right vs wrong? I understand you were in a desperate situation, but having sex with an outsider while married can only make the situation much worse!

I agree with 12adityas about confessing to your husband about the problem. This problem has reached dangerous proportions now and will keep on haunting you forever unless you come clean with your husband. There's really no telling how your husband might react. But at least you won't have this secret hanging on your head any longer.

p.s. Don't beat yourself up over the cruise ship romance. You genuinely loved that guy and he took advantage. Many of us fall in love, many of us have sex with the ones we fall in love with, but not all of us get married to that first love. I don't think you did anything wrong by being in love with the first guy. Anywhere else in the world, having past relationships like that is normal and accepted.

 

aditya she is been cheated by a man before
and now she is loyal to her husband and in trouble
i dont undertsand when you say she has to fall on legs beg plead leave ego and all

 

InPain,

How do you think your husband would react if you told him? I know at first I told you to tell him about your past and the blackmailing cousin... but do you think your dh or his parents would physically hurt you over it? I know sometimes these revelations can bring out extreme anger, and I wouldn't want to suggest something that could get you in even worse trouble. So you need to think what type of nature your husband has before you tell. But on the other hand, if you don't tell, you will always have to worry about the cousin gossiping about your past relationship, or even the forced one he had with you.

Jeez, this situation is so complex!

 

Why is this cousin so interested in your life anyways? Ugh!! Why can't people mind their own business? The cousin is like a predator. Please stay away from him at all costs. He must have a very pathetic life to have the time to go around gathering information about who moved in with who.

Anyways, I can't say any more until I know more about your husband and how he might react. Hopefully some other ladies can pull some great suggestions out of their hat. Hang in there!!!