is premarital sex right?

Then we should go back to our social system and how it was evolved.In the very initial stages human being were living like animals. Except mother no other relation was there, that too for the purpose of feeding babies only. Like animals there was free sex irrespective of any relations.

Then when civilization slowly started realtions like father, brother and sister and all came. Forbidden sex was introduced all over the world, all over the cultures.This is the basic difference between animals and human beings.

Still polyganomy etc were there even till our kings' period.Then more cultured way of one man-one woman concept (there would be some exceptions even now),sex after mariage only etc were formed in our society.

If we can break one of the above system just because only those couple will know it .They need not bother about others and as it is happening before marriage, there is no problem as long as it does not affect the present post marraige life.

By following the above policy what will happen if a male and female of close relation indulge in forbidden sex before their marriage and do not bother as it will not be known to others and they think after marriage life any way we will not do this.

 

For some ,husbands having premartial sex would be ok as it was in the past and not at present

some may even argue that husbands even after marriage when he goes out in the business tour etc, if he has any extra martial affair, it would be ok as they will not be aware of it and it does not happen with their knowledge

But what % of the husbands would be generous about their wives in similar case is a matter of debate

 

I don't think it's wrong to have premarital sex. But I think you should use lot of common sense and thought before doing it, because of the strong emotional connection it causes between you and the other person. Breaking up with the wrong person is hard, breaking up with a person you've had a physical connection with is harder.

But... love/sex happens! That is just the facts of life. I don't see any point in getting upset over things that are beyond our control and in the past. My husband was married before... so should he never married again because he had sex with his ex and no new woman would like that thought? That doesn't make sense. A man or woman's virginity shouldn't be a prison sentence that either locks us into one person for life, or bars us from finding a new person later on.

I think generally... have sex with caution, only do it with somebody if you REALLY love them, and leave the past in the past.... and it won't be a problem.

BTW: What is the 'Indian context'??? I think in terms of sex.... we ALL do it the same way, and we all feel the same way when we know a spouse has slept with other women etc. So how are Indians any more special in regards to their feelings? As if Indians have some sacred concept of marriage that the rest of the world doesn't?

This doesn't make any sense. I don't think any woman will be ok with her husband cheating WHILE he is married. Majority of time when somebody has sex with a boyfriend/girlfriend, they have not even MET their future husband/wife yet. They are not even in the picture! So there is no wrong done! But there's a big difference when you're ACTUALLY married and then decide to go out and defile your marriage!

 

1) See another thread " affair before marriage " which narrates the problems due to premartial sex

2) another problem is how sure the partners in the premartial sex acts are not prone to HIV/AIDS as some times contraceptives may not be used. So there is a chance of spreading this disease for the new bride/bridge groom for no fault of them and more pathetically to the new born babies.

3) Indian context in the sense that in Europe and US, premartial sex is a common culture these days

 

ushae I don't know where you live in india ... but premartial sex is pretty common in india too, if you don't believe me go check out the roof-tops of buildings where youngsters work .... from what I have heard they are covered in used condoms!

just that in india we are big hypocrites when it comes to sex and will not talk about the deeds done before marriage. just because people don't talk about it does not mean it does not happen.

and what about those indian families where dads are raping daughters? or those where females are sexually abused by family members and it's all hushed up for the sake of the family name? how "great" is our culture when it comes to that?

 

It does not matter where I live.

Do not think India lives only in metros and cities but also in small towns and villages where still there are values

The topic is " premartial sex is right or not?". Just becauase it is common it does not mean it is right.

Dowry system is common in India. Eve teasing is common in india. So can we say these all are right.

In how many families dads are raping daughters. If it happens in 0.01%, it does not mean it is prevelant all over india.

 

We have started to accept things, even if they are not right ethically or morally, just because they are happening in more numbers. Unless this mentality changes, one day it will be a free for all society, in all aspects of life.

 

I would go one step further and say even " POST" Marital sex with the spouse is not acceptable until the point when one is 10000000 % sure that they are not going to divorce in the future!!! Or atleast for 7 years!!....so we all remain pure and clean in heart as well as body....and die!

 

Hi,

All I want to say is " Do Not judge people according to your standards "

Some may feel pre-martial sex is not right;and condemn those who are not a virgin on marriage night whereas the others may not bat an eyelid.

Leave it to each individual.....personally please keep your bedroom talks in the bedroom itself. It does no one any good.

:my2cents Hina

 

Then this would be applicable to extra martial sex also.

For some extra martial sex is the "standard". So shall we leave it to individual?