Workplace Gossip After Separation

Recently divorced from a sexless marriage as well . I am working in this company for the last few years. I am very close to some of my colleagues and they knew everything . Rest of my team, I informed them ( dint go into details of course) . They were nothing but supportive, everyone was understanding and wished a better future for me. Honesty is the best way forward , you have nothing to be ashamed of. divorce is not that uncommon these days and honestly what can they gossip about you when they have no details. About being judged, if someone is judging you for your broken marriage ,they probably have nothing better to do. Don't pretend to be married, its like living a lie.

 

You have made a great mistake. I am not referring about your marriage, but thinking like career is not part of your personal life was a great mistake.

Now that, you are making another mistake. A grave one this time.
What's wrong to be truthful and honest in life?
Why lie? and what will you get by a lie?

One of my colleague cum best friend was a divorcee when I met her for the first time at work. Upon joining, she told everyone (of course who ever asked) about her marital status.
The team was a mixture of balanced / matured and immature people. So, the matured ones (not referring the age here) accepted her for who she is, befriended with her, and helped her knowing she was new that city and would need a helping hand to while settling down with a young kid.
The immature colleagues started talking behind her back, gossiped about her, and even went on to make stories when young men genuinely talked to her or helped her.
Such folks will change their topic when a new colleague or new problem emerge in the office. After that, there were absolutely no one to talk or even listen to the same old gossip about this divorced one.
Eventually, the office life stabilizes and everything falls in the right place.

My colleague found her soul mate in that office within 2 years. He was a colleague too.
However, she took almost 7 years to decide before agreeing for the second marriage with the blessings of both families. That guy was never married, and the whole office whole heartedly wished that couple, and more importantly helped around their wedding.

Now that, in a span of 10 years, she is happily married, with one more kid to make their life beautiful. A good career, and a supportive husband with a balanced family.

 

Sorry dear u had to go through that..
It’s ok what u have told n done is done..
U r strong to come out from that marriage this small issue at office u can handle.. just tell in brief n leave it.
Focus on your career .

 

Sorry you had to go through that sham of a marriage. Glad you made the right decision to separate (based on what you said hopefully it is the first step to a divorce and start a new future for you) and go back to India and start a career. That was a good decision. Many flounder around unable to take those steps!! I believe that there is nothing shameful about a divorce. Do not elaborate or offer explanation. Just be brief and if some folks want details just say that it did not work out. Like someone said, you lived in a sham of a marriage, step out of its shadow and accept your real life to open doors.

 

It’s ok to feel that but not all will gossip just tell in brief ..
u will know whom to trust or just do not tell all the detail to someone n then regret . If u have money to spent so to therapist n talk that is best.

 

This is not something you can hide for long...if you tell the truth that you are separated, or just say you are single...no one will ask you anything, anymore. Period. If you hide the fact, you have to keep answering...lies over lies.