Will I be able to hold a baby in my arms?

Apoorva

Sorry for your loss.I have no words to convince you because i have gone through .may the lord give you all the strength and courage .Im sure you will hold a heathy baby very soon , but pls take very good care of your health and approach a doctor to first find the reason (in many cases it could be a very small issue that could be easily fixed).Eat well and regain your health.

 

Dear Aproorva,
Read your earlier thread and now its clear that you need a well-deserved rest at your parents place. You wrote that you lost your baby due to high BP and your H and MIL's actions can give high BP to anyone!
When the doc had told you to avoid pregnancy then why was H so eager for a baby?
You need total rest to recover from the two miscarriages. You have high BP so you need a lot of care and diet retriction , no stress in everyday life .
Please do consider my suggestion , you owe it to your body , dont over do it.Never let anyone mess up yourself, your health .
If they dont care about you ,your health , you have to do take care of yourself.

 

Hi Apoorva,
It is very sad but at this very time instead of stressing your self mentally you should try to be strong.Being a women,i can understand how painful it will be for you.just take care of your health,physically and mentally.i believe in destiny.so it was bound to happen,there is no point of blaming your self.God knows the best what is good for us and when.so have faith.
wish you a quick recovery...!

 

Hugs to you dear ... whatever happen just forget and carry on focusing on healthy baby .daily get up in the morning and open your hand and see a baby face who is healthy and happy this energy will bring more happiness and lead to good pregnancy . You will definetly hold a baby in your arm for sure good luck with that ... God will never punish his children he is just testing and doing good deeds for you ... just be patience and follow the energy therapy daily for 30 days and drink milk+ghee (both u and husband ) at night for 30 days except periods days ... pray god ... ur prayers will be answered soon dear ..

 

How can one drink milk+ghee? Can you explain pls? What therapy is this?

And why do avoid period days? Is this therapy related to intercourse?

 

Dear Apoorva,

I am so sorry to hear that. That must have been a terrible experience for you.
Take good rest now and why don't you go for counselling and ask your husband to go with you? I am sure there must be a facility to help you cope with your loss. You could talk to the doctor yourself and explain the situation. Most doctors in India do understand such situations and do know and would teach you too how to handle the family.

I had a whole different opinion about your post, but I agree with Azalea. I too had a miscarriage some time back and my husband just seemed so detached and that hurt me a lot. It was our first positive after 6 years of marriage and it meant nothing to him. But I had to pick myself up and try again. I guess that would be best for you to forget the past and move on.

I hope things get better for you soon. Its important that you remain calm and gain your physical strength back.

 

Hi!Apoorva

My condolences to you. Keep your hopes high. I know a couple who had 3 miscarriages and now she is in her 15th or 16th week of pregnancy.

Pre-eclampsia is sometimes hard to predict, and am glad you are out of it, it would have been harmful for both you and baby if it had progressed to the next stage of Eclampsia. the second pregnancy I think from what you mention must have been an ectopic pregnancy. My cousin sister had one ectopic pregnancy( in fallopian tube and it ruptured) later they had the first one which IVF and second a natural pregnancy. So keep your hopes high and your health has a priority for you to have a baby in the future.

take care and May God bless you

Bhagawathy

 

Apoorva,

I hope you have read my post to your other post posted on Jan 24, 2012. I will reiterate that no woman, unless she is heavily drunk or drugged out, can kill her baby. I assure you that it was not your fault in either case. In your second case, it may have been ectopic pregnancy. It is just as well that you miscarried. Mother Nature follows the 'survival of the fittest' rule even in creation. When she knows that a certain pregnancy is not viable, she just gives it up. I have had two consecutive miscarriages too. I get the loss. I did not know the reason and I am not looking for one. I had asked my doctor if something was wrong with me, to which he replied, 'Just trust Nature'. I believe him. So I ask you to let go of the past. Don't dwell on it. Even if your husband does not allow you to go to your parents' home now, try to find something that will make you happy. Heal yourself - not just your body but your mind, too. Remember that every problem has a solution. We just need to believe that there is one.

Don't expect support from your husband. Men grieve it differently but certain men, especially Indian men, don't get it. So you are pretty much on your own. And when your husband starts to blame you or argue with you, train yourself to switch off. Picturise yourself holding a very beautiful baby and you are blissfully happy. Don't listen to him and stress yourself. If it gets bad, tell him that if he wants a baby, he should just shut up and not create tension in your life.

 

Most of DHs are totally detached from a wife's pregnancy problems and pains.
Its no joke to carry a baby for nine months, lose ones figure, have hundreds of problems but most husbands are programmed to be immune to this. For them its a wifes duty to give birth to healthy babies , since they are feeding and lodging her.
Its the mindset, generally men belonging to very feudal setup have this notion. They dont care for the wifes health or wellbeing .
Please go to your parents , let DH rave and rant. You have to recover your health before you concieve again .High BP is has to be kept under control.
The doctor cannot do much if the family does not take care of the mom -to-be.