Why such blackmail from old people ?

Hi swarna, I agree with you. This is happening even now. Educating a girl is very important. How come the girl's parents are like this? It's the duty of every parent to give good education to their girl child especially.

 

Hi, have read most of the replies, and then thought of adding my views too.
Please do not blame the grandmother. We do not know what may be some other circumstances of the girl and her family.
I do not see this as blackmail by the grandmother. Sometimes when a child is taking obviously wrong decisions or when a particular step is good for the child, it is important for an elder to intervene.
Have seen many cases where had the parents intervened or put their foot down, great mistakes in life could have been thwarted. Indulgent parents also have been known to let a child take a wrong turn which she/ he may live to regret.
I do not think we can blame the elders outright. Conditions and circumstances may be dictate some actions.

 

I still remember my sister's first proposal came when she was doing her final year in college. And she was only 19. My parents were not interested, but the boy's family and all relatives were pressurizing them. My sister simply told my father " don't blame me if after I see him I fall in love with him, then don't concentrate on my studies, and get a bad result. Because I can guarantee you that if I fall in love, I will only think of him and not my education"

This scared my parents (also made my dad and me laugh a lot) and he insisted that she not even bother to meet the guy. She fought repeatedly for many proposals (locked herself up and refused to eat until marriage talks stopped). Finally she got married to a wonderful man. Not only did my parents get a son in law, they actually got a son, and I found myself with what I always wanted....an older brother.

 

My grandmother did this to me.Because of her we had daily episode of Mahabharata at home.I went through such a turmoil.
She is no more now.Thanks god i was able to stand up to the whole episode.

 

It is emotional blackmail. That is what it is. Just imagine if the guy turns out to be bad, and the grandmother is long dead, who is to blame for this hush hush marriage

Personally I wish all the best for the girl. I hope the guy she is marrying is a nice guy.

 

thought the post is old I could not resist adding my experience .........

I know this girl (i call her didi) who got married at 18 yrs because the father was very sick & nearly on his death bed ,wanted to do Kanyadaan before dying(Kanyadaan is considered the biggest daan & gurantees Moksha).they did not check the boys background & hurriendly got her married within 10 days .......

didi was very young at that time & apple of her parents & brothers eyes...........she was mistreated at home,her hubby turned out to be drug adict......she had a baby girl & when her brother went to attend the child's 1st b'day he saw that she was not wearing any jewellary & had plaster in her hand......the brother got to know that she was beaten & her jewellary sold by the husband to buy drugs............the brother could not stand this & brought her back to her parents............
the father had made good recovery & felt very bad to have spoilt her life........

after a patch up she again went to her inlaws ,got pregnant again & then same story of abuse.........this time her parents refused to send her back & after 5-6 yrs they learnt that the husband died of drug overdose..........

now,didi & her 2 kids stay with her parents,has no source of income,no financial help from inlaws.........

this uncle(didi 's father) is very good man but his superstition spoilt his daughter's life........

 

Yor Are Right Sudha .This tradition should change.

 

terrible... i wish ..soon the good thigns should happen to you now... i done know why old people so such of expeirience of life can do such thigns...