Why do Men have All the Fun ??

A very beautiful write up. I have been thinking on the same lines and wanted to open a thread sometime. But I am damn sure that I would not have brought this out so impressively like you.

And the title sums all of it very nicely. Yes we are making the man's world easy. I don't understand why women are running in proving to the world that they are Superwomen. To whom are very proving?? To husband ? To in laws?

By taking the man's burden and making him free, what favor are we doing to our interests and passions which lie hidden during the childhood due to education and in the later years due to career. Definitely not worth so much pain.

Anyway don't want to repeat your lines, I am loving your write up here. Keep rocking:cheers

 

nice thread dear.
actually i m so confused here ..there are two reasons
i myself bring women and do most of the house course apart from job. my hubby helps me but still i feel that i should do max work and give him time to rest or give light work to him. actually as iamsrihere asked even i dont have answer to that but yes i feel somewhere satisfied that i can do it.
second thing is like days are not like earlier where single earning could have given standard living. thanks to increasing cost of everything that we ladies also have to step out and give helping hand to husbands.
i also feel that it is in our blood to do house work that no one can change.
like op said even if i go out and enjoy with friends leaving children with him still my mind rotates at home wht he must be doing..n all bie1

 

ya true but i feel happy when i see happiness and smile on all their faces.
though my hubby dont say and ready to help me in all matters but when i dont allow him and do it myself that "thank you" i can c in his eyes and which gives me more energy and confidence to do more....

 

Nice write up.. I used to think very similarly sometime bac.. Then I decided to take a break from my career n I realised in my case it's more of a 'grass is greener on the other side' story.. When I was a career woman life was such a rush but as a housewife I don't really feel perfectly fit.. I don't really enjoy housework n I find it easier to just get domestic help.. So that covers most of the housework n I'm sitting at the end of the day wondering what I did the whole day.. I do take more interest in my kids and am feel absolutely stress free, but its at the expense of losing out experience n touch in my workplace.. Besides im now financially dependent on my hubby n though he doesn't mind at all I sometimes feel I'm not using my full potential and capabilities I have been given.. Besides as my kids r growing up n finding their own things to do I'm realising unless I get bac into the flow, I'll miss the bus careerwise atleast.. N in a couple of years I'll be twiddling my thumbs with nothing to do..

I'm sure some women may really enjoy managing the home, cooking, cleaning n fixing hot meals , but not everyone may feel fulfilled doing just that, not that it is in any way a joke.. We now live in a society which seems to look down on a housewife n its not very easy to retain your confidence when everyone around you seems to think ur just jobless..

Besides at the end of the day I don't see the need to compare ourselves with men.. Men are emotionally n physically much different from women n have their own stressors n difficulties.. I mean I don't really enjoy sitting around after work with a beer n chilling out with friends.. I would want to spend that time with my family.. For me that is my stress buster. I guess that's the case with most women.. Some of it is conditioned by society but I feel, by nature women are nurturers and will have the urge to be with their family.. Besides being a patriachal society, a lot of conveniences are tilted towards men.. So using comparison is just going to make us feel more resentful especially when the benefactors are in no way more efficient than us.. It just a fact of life, I guess.. Though I do believe in gender equality, I don't think some of these achievements at a workplace mean as much to women as to men.. Which is why more men reach higher places.. Not cos they are more efficient but cos they are willing to pay the price to reach higher in their careers.. I wouldn't bother taking a promotion if it involved working till ten everynight, my husband might.. Not cos I'm lesser but cos for me I want to be more involved with my children.. I guess that makes a big difference.. Not many women would want to go higher in their careers if they don't have any time with kids even if the kids are being looked after well enough..just my perspective..

All the same I think many times its women who set the bar for ourselves too high.. When I was working I always felt I'm not doing enough for my kids but now I realise I was doing most of what I'm doing now.. I was not forgiving myself for what I couldn't do n was trying to be the best at both, which is of course a tightrope walk n not worth it.. Once we accept that we can do only so much n make peace with ourselves I think we can be less harried.. I see some of my colleague who do manage really well n iv realised that have set their limits n do the best they can.. That are not the go getters at the workplace n try to get a decent amount of time with their families too.. I guess that is one way we could achieve a semblance of balance atleast.. I remember a colleague of mine saying' a working woman can never give her 100 percent at home or at the workplace but even if she manages75 percent at both places she is giving 150 percent of herself' . so we need to be kind on ourselves too

Besides I think our mother too he'd their own stressors.. I mean, for many women working is a streebuster compared to living with nagging inlaws.. Besides all the emancipation we have now gives us a choice atleast.. Not like we have to resign to our fate n live with abusive partners cos we r financially depdt.. Nor do we have to tolerate being looked down on jus cos we r simply sitting at home! Nor do we have to go hang ourselves if we r raped or get ready to be sacrificed for honor!! Now we have a CHOICE which our mothers dint have..

 

@docathome you are absolutely right. the same thinking was haunting me too some time back after my younger DD but good i dint quite my job. u know children after reaching certain age needs freinds and external circle u cannot hold them all the time. at that time we feel like what u r feeling right now.
and op mentioned that we need to go to each other places to chill but believe me non of my friends have that much time. in fact now a days no body neither freinds or relatives have time to visit and stay at each others places as all are piled up with their own routines and schedules.
i think relaxing can be anything. just play music loud and dance (ganpati style) with your children also helps a lot. i do same, but very soon m interrupted by my elder DD with mummy are you ok??:hide::rotfl

 

May be we women do all works so perfectly and professionally, which most of the men cannot do ) and that's why we take up more work at home and give less to hubby dear.

Yes I agree generally women do more work at home, but I have seen some women (without working outside) being lazy to do household work. Also women has a luxury of hiring a maid and cook to help her in household chores, but men doesn't have that luxury to hire a maid to help him in his office work. Generally if husband is working and wife is at home, then it is not fair to ask him to participate in household work unless the wife is not well or there's too much of work load, this is like sharing the responsibilities, like husband works outside and earns money for the family and wife manages the house. But there are some men who are working at office and again helping their wives at home eventhough the wife is not working. That means in these cases some men are taking more load. I think those men should start a separate thread to vent.

 

hahahhaha seriously even i have come across such ladies and i feel:spin

 

This is something I have always found myself wondering bmaquarius. Did our grandmas have it better than us? We have landed ourselves in a situation where we end up doing a lot more than women of previous generations had to contend with - with due respect, they did have loads of housework and many kids, but then that was where it ended. They did not have to contend with outside work, kids' homework, having to do the role of cabdriver for the family .....

Fine, our generation has earned the right to study, go to work, do not have to have innumerable kids ..... but has it meant that men have taken on the mantle of half the domestic work? Maybe it is still a change in progress, but till then it will continue to be a double whammy, while 'the boys have all the fun'.