Why divorce rate is increasing in India day by day?

Times change, people change - BUT only some people change. Earlier women were not educated or if they were, they were often not completely financially independent. Even if they worked, their salary was seen only as a supplement to the family kitty. Obviously, it was not possible for them to stand on their own and to support themselves and kids on their incomes alone. So they had little options other than to stay on in a marriage, however unhappy.

Today realities have changed. Many women are in high power jobs, earning well, sometimes even more than their men. Under these circumstances if men (who naturally like to hold onto the past as it suited their convenience perfectly well) continue to hold antiquated expectations of the women and refuse to change, is it surprising if the women say "enough is enough"?

That is not to say that all divorces take place only because the woman is ill-treated. EMAs and an overwhelming self-centredness which is creeping up in the psyche of people also contributes to divorces (sometimes on the flimsiest grounds as well).

 

Because people want to LIVE and not just EXIST anymore.

 

All the points mentioned above almost say it all. They are so true..

Woman gaining power has been looked at with so much hostility...Its so bad that a woman becomes a woman's enemy when it comes to the battle of power. There are many cases, as already mentioned, where MIL doesn't make it easy for the DIL to live her life in peace and its a fact that it happens the other way round too.

It seems to happen anywhere, its not just India. Why else would they make a movie in Hollywood named "Monster-in-law" or a sitcom such as "Everybody loves Raymond" where they display the western approach to MIL vs DIL!!

But these are things that can be overcome, in most cases that is, with a little more tolerance and determination to keep the marriage going no matter what. The easy way out of a problem might work for most but not all of it.

Marriage never is "happily ever after" and like in movies its never "the end" (although men might feel so..lol).
Its always THE BEGINNING. There's so much to come with it - good and bad. And to deal with it you need to put yourself into it like you might for your day-job - man or woman - working or not.

There is always a point where it goes way out of proportions that you HAVE to split. As long as that reason is logical, necessary to let the concerned people continue living life peacefully, there's no harm done. Who would like to be the perfect wife or a husband when the other isn't committed enough or sincere enough or even willing enough to be in it?

Like I read in another post earlier - It takes 2 to tango..makes sense!!

 

In my view whatever other ladies has expressed their opinion it is true to certain extent.

Some of the picks ;
-> Nowdays girls are able to think ; it was not the case of earlier.
-> Independent and knows how to lead their life ; extreme they are okay with being Single, Single Mom
-> Not much compromise like earlier generation
-> Last but not least "A Change"

 

Lol..I just thought about one more thing..
This came up while I was discussing the topic with friends. Splitting up happens in all kinds of marriages. Arranged and Love.

In either case, couples should learn to cope with each other on their own and unless there is no other go, should not let outer influences to affect them. Status, earnings, peer pressure, customs, modern life challenges and most importantly your own people - they are all important, but not more important than the two that are involved.

Sharing always helps a problem but its not so healthy when you let another person's "opinion" be yours. Two people always have different perspectives and when you are involved, only you know the real picture.

 

Many are expressing views only on women. I have question for you ladies
"Are the wives are the main reason for divorce?" - Child thread of this one. So please we will discuss in terms of this thread importance.

 

The divorce rate in India is increased because of the living conditions and lack of moral values. In olden days they used to live along with the elders, brothers, sisters and other family members. There they have the chance of sharing the problems and happy moments also. Then there will not be any stress to the persons. Now there are no big families and both male and female are well educated and both are working. Here women are getting equality as a fundamental right and it is giving the confidence to feel freedom in all aspects. But in some areas it is going to be misused and giving adverse effects also. Now the women are feeling that they are independent and no need to depend on husband or in-laws. It is making them irresponsible to the needs of the other family members. Now every one is giving importance to earn more and trying to increase the financial status in the society. For that the working conditions making them very stressful and leading mechanical life. No grand parents to look after the children. Joining parents in old age homes and sending children to day care centers. When elders are not there to share the feelings we can not get suggestions or solutions to the problems. Because of the stress in the work they start blaming each other for every thing. Automatically the arguments lead to divorce.

 

What I mentioned earlier applies to any person in a marriage. I guess most people have done so.
An abusive/impotent/sadist partner - man or woman - is an obvious choice for a divorce. And men are not the only abusive kind..woman can be as bad too and I know that for a fact. I know I nag my husband incessantly day and night but he does not seem to mind it. I could be an obvious threat to run from..lol But he just tolerates me better than I do him. But if the marriage fails, my own impatience and insecurities could be the reason. Or his negligence and ignorance to issues that needed me to nag could be.

So you can't really pin it down to a man or a woman. Every point applies to both.

PS: I agree with the point by Ali. Living as nuclear families has a lot to do with things. Somehow in my own opinion, my living apart from my big families - with loads of people around, all different - good, difficult and impossible to get along with - has deprived me from gaining the ability to fit into what ever situation is posed to us. We tailor make our days and our lives to just ourselves and what we think is needed, we end up ignoring the rest while it plays a lot more important role in keeping us from driving the spouse away.

Its not like we are living abroad trying to avoid our family out there. Work situations and other practical reasons have to be considered. But living away sure has made a huge difference. Having someone right next to you can be stressful if it gets way out of hand with the advice and constant comments, but it does help a greater good at times.

 

Its lack of mutual-interdependence with growing affluence. Today, both men and women know they can live and survive independently, then why take unreasonable crap from spouse.

 

Super like. Wife who TL, PM in big MNCs shd be listening to craps,cheap things, bullism of himself, his mom and sis like an uneducated idiot.