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Who should Bare the Delivery Expenses?

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by arch1984, Sep 3, 2015.

  1. Ragini25

    Ragini25 Platinum IL'ite

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    Interesting thought as I read, Some of the pronouncements can be made for those of us who have been fortunate to have been exposed or ingrained to more progressive parents, families, friends, societies. So one person's 2015 may be another's 1990 and another's 2040. IL just like real world is a mix.
     
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  2. arch1984

    arch1984 Senior IL'ite

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    Hi girls

    Yes ragini...well said...many are lucky to have parents and pil's of 2015 thoughts...may be i am unfortunate to hav parents of 2015 and pil's of 1990's..

    Now wen coming to stand up...i dint que my dad wen he brought me the alliance of my now dh...i juz said whether i liked it or not...and then when both the families sat together to discuss how the marriage should be done...and who should take d costs (obviously my father mostly )...i dint que...when i was asked to touch the feet of my husband in the name of custom..i dint que...only after my marriage i started questioning..and had very huge fights...i cant ask my in-laws not to interfere in OUR issues...never...i cant change someone who are still living in 1990's in the name of custom..but lives in 2015 in terms of all the amenities....if parents live in 1990's how will d son grow up to 2015...he ll be hanging up somewhere in the middle...now said and done.....i feel very bad too...for asking my dad to go to my PIL's...nly for this i cant abandon my in-laws...as they are my husband's parents afterall...if i wud hav fought i shud hav left my husband by now...BDW i stopped working once i got conceived.......
     
  3. arch1984

    arch1984 Senior IL'ite

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    "I am quite shocked that you want advice in this regard. "
    I dint ask for advice..i juz wanted to know the scenario with all others...who had this custom..and how dey faced

    "You are living in USA, a working women, Why can't you speak for yourself. Even you were not working, your parents are not supposed to pay anything. Just give a blast to your husband and in laws."

    Yes i too had the same opinion of parents not paying for my child....giving blast will not do me any good..it is not easy as it jus looks

    How silly is this to make your father go to your in laws house for giving money? I think you made your father feel very sad. A baby is a gift from god. You should be happily spending money. After all they are your parents. They sacrificed everything for you and in turn you can't even speak up for them. Yes very bad me....felt very bad whenever i think about dis..

    First of all you should not have let your father give money to your husband. I think you better open up and speak to your in laws and ask them not to interfere in your life anymore. If they still continue with these stupid demands, you better start saving up your own money and not spend even a single penny for your in laws and even for your husband. Your husband should be bold enough to face his parents. Even if I live in India, I will not let my parents pay for my delivery expenses.

    For gods sake, don't feel weak and pathetic for being born as a women and you better feel confident and set a good example for future generations. U really are a very good example...thanks for dat
     
  4. armummy

    armummy Platinum IL'ite

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    If you cannot oppose your pILs then the smart thing to do is bear the expenses yourself and inform everyone that parents did it . You just need to make sure you do not burden your parents .
     
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  5. arch1984

    arch1984 Senior IL'ite

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    thats what i did finally...i returned the amount which my dad gave
     

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