Whether INLAWS bad?

This entry is to know "whether INLAWS are bad ?"

I think this is a very biggest doubt of mine;
let me tell u a small story that, y I’m doubting like tis,

While i was doing my post graduation i got engaged with my DH & get married after the completion of my degree ,( ie) two years gap inbetween

that are wonder days for me; not bcoz tat i was chatting with my wouldbe tru fone, but coz of my MIL,FIL & SIL (4 years younger to me)
who were very very loving to me, keep on praising me for whatever I do, they showered their love for me like anything; i felt so happy & even my parents. I believed that my married life is just gona be so happy coz of my ILs, i believed them like anything , but sometimes i realized tat they are not respecting my parents which was hurting, but again wat i felt is my happy life will automatically make my parents feel good

But wat happened is...................
I got married, the very first day itself they started mistaking me, theycount each & every words of mine wrong, i basically very talkative , I used to speak with them as im with my parents, but now I’m keeping quiet ; it really hurts me a lot, im always willing to be good with them, I need their relationship, I truly love them, my brother in law (yielder brother of my DH , he is in USA) was good to me always, he used to advice me not to worry; be cool & keep being patient; but he is also not so friendly now a day’s…………….which really made me to worry a lot

I do so many self analysis to find whether I’m doing anything wrong; so that I can correct myself & try to be good with them but they simply say tat I’m acting as sweet & good make my DH believe me good.
I cried a lot with worry they says tat I’m creating dramas to keep my DH my side
I spoke with my In-laws to fix the issue, they says that im speaking good but nothing in action;( I never quarreled even they have not scolded me much but my FIL used to write letters abusing me)
I thought if once they got a grandchild thru me; they will be good to me, but thing still things are worse
I totally fed up of all these, now I decided not to worry about this much

But still I have some questions:
1.Why they showed love to me before my marriage? & why not now?
2.If they found me wrong somewhere why can’t they scold me to correct me, instead of hurting me by hating me?
3.I believe that my In-laws are not bad, but y all these problems?
4.I’m ready to forget everything to keep good bond with them (no expectation at all (i.e.) no Financial/Physical Dependency) why don’t they?
5.After all I’m in my twenties where they are in their Sixties can't they forgive me, even if I’m wrong?

I asked all these questions to my In-laws itself, even no improvement; I strongly believe that even they can’t be happy by hurting me like this, they want to have a good DIL for them that’s y they selected me & try to be sweet with me; but what is the issue now?

(I have not explained any of the issue I faced with them, that’s a different story)

How can I make them realize that how sweet I am?.how much I love them, how much I respect them, how much their son worrying abt tis issue ( even though he is tackling it well), how much it hurts my parents & my little sister ;whoever cares for me; I really really want to be sweet to them, I’m not acting & love them really coz they only happily arranged this marriage, they only gave my Loving DH for me ………..what else I can say ,

WHO CAN EXPLAIN MY INLAWS THAT I TRULY LOVE THEM AS MY PARENTS AND ALWAYS NEED THEM TO BE HAPPY, I NEED THEIR BLESSINGS ALWAYS

I ALWAYS BELIEVED THAT I CAN BE A SWEET DIL; AND I WILL BE APPRECIATTED FOR BEING THIS MUCH SWEET, BUT NOTHING WORKED OUT, i never expected tat these things will happen to me in my life......

IM REALLY SORRY ,IF IM WRONG,
IM ALWAYS HERE FOR U WITH FUL OF LOVE

still confusions ....its better to conclude tis.......
I have told in the beginning itself that “This entry is to know "whether INLAWS are bad?"”
Certainly not! Then y is the gap between us?

 

Yes Ji, u r correct i almost keeping mum with them, its like no contact with them even thouh i visit my inlaws home once in aweek twe wont speak much......... but these questions r there in my mind always, i worry tat ifall these not happend, how happy our life wud be, we are spoiling our happy days:bonk

the only thing wat i ccud do is to forget everthing & to do my duties & to enjoy my life without worrying

Thank you somuch for sharing ur experienced thought

 

Thank you Srikala for ur FB,
yes there is ne use worring abt tis, atleast wat we cud do is to promissing the future generation tat tis kinda bad situation will not come to them in their life, as a parant of any male child they can deside to grow their son with quality attributes and also they cud be sweet enough with their DIL & her family also;

i again stress the point tat Inlaws are not bad, tsince they are good, they can be sweet with their DIL too...........

 

Thank u Mariselvi for ur sugggestions,
As u said we tried to arrange for some family outings together,they show no interest. One day i realised tat to maintain the relationship i shud not spoil my parents respect too........ so now i understood tat there is no way tat a MIL can be a MOM, i deside to accept the reality & show a clear face tat im not worrying much, but wen ever i comeacross with ppl who spent good time with their IL's i really long for tat, let me wait for the day

Thank you dea, for ur FB
Cheers