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What Should I Do That Any Adult Won't Call Me Aunty? I Am Just 35.

Discussion in 'Keep Fit & Maintain Shape' started by pruthvee, Jan 5, 2017.

  1. Jan 5, 2017 #1
    pruthvee

    pruthvee Senior IL'ite

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    I am just 35 and I don't mind if kids call me aunty but I am experiencing many times that even young adults call me aunty and that's extremely embarrassing. Today I went to hospital. A young male nurse who was 25-26 called me aunty but he called my cousin of same age didi. She is overweight too but it's just her height is more than me. I don't understand what is wrong with me?

    I am not experiencing this now but I was experiencing this even when I was in mid-20s. Even at that time some guys of same age as me or just few years younger than me called me aunty. I was always overweight but my weight than was much less than now. Now, I am 90 kgs. When I was in my mid-20s, I was just 60 kgs (my height is exactly five feet). Still I was considered over weight even at that time. My hands, legs, shoulders, hips were slim but my lower belly was always bigger and I don't know if there is something wrong with my hair, face or body language that people always misunderstands me as older than my real age. When I got engaged and went to shop to buy marriage bangles, the shopkeeper asked for whom I need to buy. I said it's my marriage & for myself. I felt as if he looked on side and giggled and behaved as if I said something strange. Then he went to his colleague and told something in her ears. Then I asked him to show other cosmetics stuff, so he asked me to approach his colleagues. I went to her and she first congratulated me for getting married and then asked my age. (I was 27 then). I asked her why is she asking my age? She said she's just asking like that and then commented, it's good that you're getting married, "better late than never". I asked her why is she saying that then she tried to divert discussion and started using her marketing skills on me to sell her stuff.

    I felt so hurt that day. My ex-husband was also teasing me by saying puraani, (it means old thing). One marriage prospect came to see me when I was 26. His mother commented that her son is just 28 and how old is this girl? I was hurt. I've asked my friends to give me honest opinion that if I look older, they say I just need to reduce weight. But I've noticed many other girls who are obese and overweight but they still look younger. My sister blames my grooming and say that there are girls who are more fat than you but you're doing something wrong and you're not carrying yourself properly.

    Ladies, I don't understand what's wrong. When I look at my pics and in mirror, I don't feel my face looks that old. It's just my weight but don't know why people think I am older than my age. Now many people misunderstands I am in my mid-40s. But I am just 35, and single. Never had kid. One of my colleague commented he thought I might be in my mid-40s.

    Please let me know what care I should take of myself apart from losing weight so that people who are just few years younger than me or same age as me won't misunderstand me as aunty    :tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy::tearsofjoy:
     
    pruthvee, Jan 5, 2017
    pruthvee, Jan 5, 2017
    #1
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  2. Jan 5, 2017 #2
    anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Well, There is this girl who is my friend's niece.she is only 4 years younger than me.

    Me and her are of the same height and I ma maybe two inches shorter

    Same weight and am
    Slightly thinner

    Many people both desis and Americans have told me I look very young

    I wear very good contemporary western outfits

    I am well groomed.

    She still calls me AUNTY not coz of my looks but because I am
    Married and a mom.In other cases it's the age.once they know you are well above thirty,they start this aunty thing

    Your looks are not always the problem remember.Their perception of you because of their surroundings and brought up is the problem.

    Now as for weight,if you really want to reduce take it seriously and work very hard till you reach you goal no matter what.no excuses as you definetly can.I am just encouraging you and pls don't take it otherwise.

    Change the way you dress,your hairstyle.gives you more confidence

    Get facials,skin care groom yourself.

    Drink plenty of water

    Wear sunscreen and light quality makeup
    Sure you will look wonderful

    All the best
     
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2017
    anika987, Jan 5, 2017
    anika987, Jan 5, 2017
    #2
    sindmani, MNR and beautifullife30 like this.
  3. Jan 5, 2017 #3
    Meet9

    Meet9 Silver IL'ite

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    Meet9, Jan 5, 2017
    Meet9, Jan 5, 2017
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  4. Jan 5, 2017 #4
    Meet9

    Meet9 Silver IL'ite

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    Oh it looks like my previous reply did not post...anyways...I wanted to say:

    1. Dont care about people, you cannot change their mindset upbringing etc, you can avoid hurting yourself by chinning up and ignoring their comments.

    2. Get involved in some sort of makeover, like getting shorted hairstyle slices off so many years from face, some good facials give a nice glow and uplift our skin, maybe wear shorter kurtas with churidaars instead of full fledged suit salwars if you wear those..trendy fresh prints instead of big prints, small prints look better on shorter women..etc..

    3. finally, try losing weight :), 90kgs on 5 ft may give you health issues..better start walking and checking diet..this will also boost your confidence....

    good luck!
     
    Meet9, Jan 5, 2017
    Meet9, Jan 5, 2017
    #4
    MNR likes this.
  5. Jan 5, 2017 #5
    MNR

    MNR Gold IL'ite

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    Oh this aunty, Check my other thread about my venting.

    It is the mind set, may be they don't know what is right or wrong. Looks like Its our duty to correct them.

    Once they face they would come to know the feeling.

    Weight does not matter here , the time your married has a kid, you are an aunty to everyone. Stupids..
    See I am 32, 5'4'' , 61 Kgs , I dont look old.. still I am called aunty by these 20 something fools.

    In my thread @guesshoo suggested , better ways. Try to follow them.

    Aunty Aunty .. I Hate This Word.
     
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2017
    MNR, Jan 5, 2017
    MNR, Jan 5, 2017
    #5
    Meet9 likes this.
  6. Jan 5, 2017 #6
    rajatsingh

    rajatsingh Silver IL'ite

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    Sorry for the diversion. You say you are single now. So, the marriage had broken, right ? Just wanted to know how long the marriage lasted ?
     
    rajatsingh, Jan 5, 2017
    rajatsingh, Jan 5, 2017
    #6
  7. Jan 5, 2017 #7
    Meet9

    Meet9 Silver IL'ite

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    Exactly MNR!

    generally you see people who call aunty have low economic background due to which they see all around girls getting married early and once they have kids they should be called aunty.... it is the mentality and upbringing...I would even say dont even bother to go and correct them....because the more we seem to be getting irritated the more they will tease....
    apart from this, there is also some cultural thing associated with it, like in my DH family, i was extremely surprised when my SIL calls "Aunty" to her Dads brothers wife...the age difference between them is just 3 years!!! and Dad's brother is also just 7 years elder to her.... logically she can call her aunty..but since the age difference is so low, it looks awkward esp my SIL looks wayyyy more aged and mature than her "Aunty"!! :)
     
    Meet9, Jan 5, 2017
    Meet9, Jan 5, 2017
    #7
  8. Jan 6, 2017 #8
    paru123

    paru123 Gold IL'ite

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    General tendency of some vendors to call us aunty when dressed in churidar or saree or kurta with shawl. They don't actually spend even a fraction of second to guess the age of the person. I don't get offended by that, but when girls in late teens or early twenties call me aunty I do. If we wear short tops with jeans and not use a stole I am sure many of us can see a difference. Also one should not be obese.
     
    paru123, Jan 6, 2017
    paru123, Jan 6, 2017
    #8
  9. Jan 6, 2017 #9
    Vennella

    Vennella Gold IL'ite

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    This is such an Indian problem, I must say. I think we are brought up like that. I have erred too sometimes, calling some ladies aunties...I don't even know why I did that. Afterwards, I thought about it and regretted.
     
    Vennella, Jan 6, 2017
    Vennella, Jan 6, 2017
    #9

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