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What is the real meaning of marriage?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by kcb, Feb 7, 2016.

  1. poovai

    poovai Platinum IL'ite

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    @sdiva20,

    Trying to understand the current generation. There is an innocence in our 20's and that will not be the same in 30's, more matured mind. If I were given a choice, I would have choose to settle in my career first, too.
     
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  2. DivyaVignesh01

    DivyaVignesh01 New IL'ite

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    Well said poovai

    Earlier generation, people were forced to get married at the right age.They would hardly know what to expect or what not to expect from their partners.They fall in love after marriage. In case things don't work out for them as expected, people are forced to adjust and compromise for the sake of family and children.

    But current generation is much more matured. Let it be women or men, they know the importance of settling down their career first before jumping into marriage. They are mature enough to understand their partners better.

    Earlier, soon after marriage , the next step was to extend the family by having kids. By the time they realize that things are not working out, they are helpless and forced to stick on to the relationship without Love.
    But today many couples do not wish to extend their family without understanding each other.Ultimately it leads to a happy family in future.
     
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  3. IniyaaSri

    IniyaaSri IL Hall of Fame

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    Read all your opinions which were sensible!! :) My thoughts are here.

    Marriage is a bond which completes us. Let it be man or woman. They can see a different world through the eyes of their partner. Of course many might want to live a happy single life! Even that might seem to be happy. But only marriage can give that fulfillment. Receiving love and affection from a different gender, witnessing the pros and cons of other gender, supporting them physically and morally.. Only these things makes life meaningful..

    Marriage deals with just 2 hearts!! No age, no domination, no gender discrimination! Everyone else are outsiders except husband & Wife. Its a beautiful company which we will have forever. But ironically many of us hurt our lifelong company for other temporary people in our life.. Just imagine how we should treat a person who is going to be our everything and travel with us till our death bed...

    But in today's Indian set up, women are asked to marry the entire family along with her husband!! A woman needs to say yes to whatever the inlaws says and much more. And people except that she should not have a difference of opinion from her inlaws. People are still not matured enough to deal with the difference of opinion. How is it possible for everyone to have same opinion?!! Even today women cant take care of their parents as guys do.. Though many are trying, still that hesitation is prevailing. And there are women who just use men as ATM machines and nothing else..
     
  4. nandita24

    nandita24 Gold IL'ite

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    Whatever the goals and objectives of marriage, is marriage the only way of achieving them? The disadvantages are just too many along with the other risks. And so an alternative must be in place and welcomed in any case! let us start listing the disadvantages of marriage to begin with. And let it be from observation and personal experience.
     
  5. Hemamalini1985

    Hemamalini1985 New IL'ite

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    marriage a word denotes not only husband and wife also a marriage of aged people(that means inlaws)... According to me they are main pillars to teach about married life.... We ever v both fight , we will get a lesson from inlaws that means we should forget our quarells, temper, egos immediately after the moment we fight.... that will make our life smooth... Also the new outcome from our marrued life(baby) will also teach us a lot..
    sometimes we compare our marriage life with others that is not wrong but that should be reasonble, meaningful... also onething i would like to share fight doesnt seperate eachother it will bring both CLOSER and increases understanding
     
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  6. coolgal123

    coolgal123 Platinum IL'ite

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    Posted in wrong thread...
     
  7. kcb

    kcb IL Hall of Fame

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    ..............
     
  8. kcb

    kcb IL Hall of Fame

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  9. sdiva20

    sdiva20 Platinum IL'ite

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    There will always be difference from one generation to next. When women first started working outside home, so many in the older generation thought what was the need.

    I think we are very innocent as long as we live with our parents because they take care of everything. We have all privileges and no responsibilities in our homes. Many women leave their parents home only after marriage and that is when they really start to mature. My mother's case was like that. I left home and country and had to start over life in a new place where I knew no one- no safety net. I grew up then- and very quickly. I matured and learned to be responsible.

    When I started working, my parents wanted me to get married but I could not because I did know anyone I wanted to get married at the time. I wanted to make sure the person I married could live with my bad side too. So it is also about timing.

    It is important to find a person who is compatible and with who you share same values. To me it was better to be single than to be in a loveless marriage.

     
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  10. LotusAura

    LotusAura Gold IL'ite

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    What is the meaning of marriage.
    This question is as simplistic as it's answer complex. Complex yet simple, simple yet complex :)

    I do partly concur with the post about getting married in 20s. But that does not in anyway mean that I undermine the importance of establishing a career.
    It's just that I'm a firm believer in the laws and forces of nature. I believe that there's a predetermined (by nature) optimum age window for certain biological functions that include having children.

    Not that women can't have kids in their 30s, 40s and beyond, but I view 20s as the optimal age accorded by nature for this purpose. I got married and became a mother in my 20s; that worked for me and I wouldn't change it if I had to do it again. And I see a lot of women around like me who became mothers in heir 20s and enjoy flourishing careers in their 30s and beyond because their kids are in a stable grown up age group and life has fallen into a smooth trajectory.

    On the other hand, I have unmarried friends in their 30s well advanced in their careers but stressed about their biological clock ticking away in their quest for a perfect Mr. Right. Also, in 30s they're much too used to a certain way of life and set in their lifestyles, habits & general routines of living individually & independently. So the bar for the desired and exacting standards of a Mr. Right is pushed higher and higher...as the number of eligible Mr. Right starts dwindling with most of them already married. It's a vicious cycle for some.
    I just feel it's easier to adapt and adjust with each other in 20s than at a later age when one is set in their ways. Sadly, 'loveless marriages' can happen as much in 30s or 40s as they might in 20s. People fall out of love even after finding an ideal spouse so to say. While others chasing careers well into 30s and beyond don't taste the financial success as some do in their 20s.

    An advanced age offers no particular guarantee of finding an ideal soulmate or a super successful career.
     

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