What is the etiquette here?

SocalMommy · Dec 26, 2011

We were at a friends house Yesterday for a get together. There were a lot of families with a lot of kids. The friends are well off and have a two storeyed mansion like house. The kids were playing upstairs and I was sitting downstairs with my friends. There was nobody my Son's age so he was playing alone with a toy dinosaur. I sent him upstairs to play with his older sister.

I don't know when my son came downstairs and started rotating the lazy susan (the little round flat disc that revolves on a round dining table) and suddenly we heard a loud thud. The glass jug that was on the revolving surface was crushed to pieces.
The hostess and all the ladies including me, immediately started cleaning the floor, kept the other kids away etc. I took my son in a corner and gave him a piece of my mind. I felt so embarrassed and guilty. If only I knew my son was downstairs, I could have hopefully prevented the whole jug breaking episode.
I went to the hostess and apologized. She said it wasn't a big deal. She was glad that nobody was hurt.
I still feel bad. I want to give her a jug/pitcher next time we go to their house. But I am not sure if giving a jug to a millionaire will look nice. Will they be offended? What is the etiquette here? What would you do, if you were in my position. Please share your thoughts.
Thanks
Hajira

Srama · Dec 30, 2011

Hajira,

it was purely an accident and the hostess seems to be quite gracious about it. Personally I would not give the same thing that was broken and wouldnot like to receive as well. So I would refrain from that. I am not sure if the water jug was way too expensive - either ways if you really feel bad probably you could give her something nice like chocolates (Godiva etc), may be a bouquet of flowers with a card that says something like thank you for being so gracious and would not wait till next invitation though. If she was clear it was no big deal, probably she means it so you can call her again, thank her and leave it at that. I think you should not let it hang on to you as well - it is ok things happen and by repeatedly apologsing sometimes you do tend to embarass the person on the other side. See what works - a phone call/a chocolate box - do it and let go!

SocalMommy · Dec 31, 2011

Thank you srama. You are right. I will not think much about it. She has 4 kids of her own, one boy and 3 girls. A box of chocolates seems like a good idea. I am sure the kids would love the yummy treats.

samraa · Dec 31, 2011

hi,

dont worry these things happen once a while.do'nt blame yourself or your little one.you said sorry and i am sure she too reacted in a dignified way.leave it at that.do not try to replace the broken item-she is a friend after all.