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What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a reason?

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Vaanii, Jul 4, 2013.

  1. Jul 4, 2013 #1
    Vaanii

    Vaanii Silver IL'ite

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    It's funny though,how many of you faced this:

    Whatever your in-laws do/say or don't will be right and have a reason behind it.Husband goes like,she(his mom) is innocent,she doesn't know how to talk,she might be in tension,or she has a reason for it,dont take it to heart blah blah blah...............[​IMG]

    But the same is done by your parents becomes a big disaster and husband's whole family start taunting it forever?Saying why is your mother like this,why she is taunting,even if she speaks normally ?Why is your father like that,they knew it but did it intensionaly,they didnt raise u properly......................:bonk

    If they dont talk u or ur parents even at normal visits ,they r busy,if ur really busy and cannot pay attention in a big event on them,thats it,it becomes mahabharat...............epic for years......................................No matter what we did and how we spared them so far,everything will be flushed from their tiny brains forever.Because they cannot hold much good in their tiny brains,so replaces it with small silly things........and keeps crying for ever.:hide:


    Have u faced any of these...If so share your experiences too..............
     
    Vaanii, Jul 4, 2013
    Vaanii, Jul 4, 2013
    #1
    1 person likes this.
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  2. Jul 4, 2013 #2
    bhuvnidhi

    bhuvnidhi IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea

    Welcome to the Indian Instituition of Marriage!
     
    bhuvnidhi, Jul 4, 2013
    bhuvnidhi, Jul 4, 2013
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  3. Jul 5, 2013 #3
    Radhica

    Radhica Silver IL'ite

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea

    Dear Vanii

    Rightly said...I can give you hundreds of instances for this topic....At first I thought only I am facing this issue but thanks to IL I realised that same story is repeated all over the world....
     
    Radhica, Jul 5, 2013
    Radhica, Jul 5, 2013
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  4. Jul 5, 2013 #4
    DGcreative

    DGcreative Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea

    My Uncle (my father's real younger brother) expired & MIL did not bother to come (pretext of taking care of my son), coulnt ever visit again till date (been more than a year), couldnt even call once for condolence(she doesnt call otherwise either) but its fine coz my FIL visited Dad.

    MIL's Sister's MIL expired & my Mom visited them (stays close to them). It was an issue as my Dad should have ideally visited:rant
     
    DGcreative, Jul 5, 2013
    DGcreative, Jul 5, 2013
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  5. Jul 5, 2013 #5
    silvertulip

    silvertulip Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea

    Reading ur post reminded me of the lessons of political science. I feel the principles of despotism apply to politics of home in the life of a DIL as well. The concept of right and duties have no relation in DIL's life. She is supposed to do duties and is devoid of any rights, even the basic right to be with her parents/family after marrying the DH. It can be similar to despotism, and MIL is the supreme authority who commands 100% obedience and her rule cannot be questioned. MIL is the absolute supreme authority and DIL is supposed to live as per orders of MIL. Even though there is no reason, no logic, yet MIL's orders are to be obeyed!

    DIL is supposed to do her duties and must not expect any right or freedom. MIL has every right and owes no duty to DIL, she owes duty to SIL and whoever she pleases. MIL can command DIL to perform duties for everyone MIL expects. Same treatment is meant for DIL's parents/family.
     
    silvertulip, Jul 5, 2013
    silvertulip, Jul 5, 2013
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  6. Jul 5, 2013 #6
    Twinkel

    Twinkel Platinum IL'ite

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea

    Am so damn relieved to know that am not alone and this is normal. What ever senseless my mil says or does, all my DH have to say about it is, "Oh, she is so very innocent and she does not know how to talk" ...
    OH REALLY?!?
     
    Twinkel, Jul 5, 2013
    Twinkel, Jul 5, 2013
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  7. Jul 5, 2013 #7
    ladki1

    ladki1 Silver IL'ite

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea

    in my case my dh says she don't know hindi properly..that's y she is saying like this...and my question will be the language of the love is also understood by the animals...it does not mean that animals know hindi to conveyed love....
     
    ladki1, Jul 5, 2013
    ladki1, Jul 5, 2013
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  8. Jul 5, 2013 #8
    anushri

    anushri IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea

    Haven't we come to a conclusion that life is not a science to go by facts n logics? ;-)
    Some problem, one solution might be ideal universally... But that can be followed only by in-laws n not parents... :-D
    Consider married life as an art let it go however it goes, if its understandable many will admire it ;-) else it's gonna be a modern art "only" intelligent ppl can understand :-D DIL proposes MIL disposes is the perfect saying!
     
    anushri, Jul 5, 2013
    anushri, Jul 5, 2013
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  9. Jul 5, 2013 #9
    bhuvnidhi

    bhuvnidhi IL Hall of Fame

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea

    Actually only in marriage ,sadism,infidelity(even crimes like dowry harrasment) get highest degree of honour.Husbands supporting their mother who likes to make the DIL uncomfortable and derive pleasure out of it (in lot of cases hubby joins his mother).But still the girl,girl's parents support this sadism indirectly by "adjusting" and "compromising" with them.And in most cases,giving them the highest priority and honour.
    Maappillai(groom) becomes elder than his FIL automatically.Girl's parents and relatives do not deserve any respect.

    We can only "adjust" till we stand up against it.But we should accept that it is not a sacrifice , it is our helplessness(whatever the case may be society or parents) or the way we are fed from childhood.Hope things will be better in future.It is a good start that atleast we acknowledge that problem exists,instead of supporting the biased system in the name of respect and duty.Respect and duties are always there but not at the cost of suffocating someone or making their life miserable( be DH ir MIL or SIL or DIL).
     
    bhuvnidhi, Jul 5, 2013
    bhuvnidhi, Jul 5, 2013
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  10. Jul 5, 2013 #10
    Vaanii

    Vaanii Silver IL'ite

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    Re: What ever your in-laws does o rdont or say or doesn't becomes true and have a rea


    Hahaha LOL..................:)
    In my sister wedding,my mom kept running after them at home if they want water ,juice,etc every minute,and even my sister(the bride)came running during her makeup and spoke to them,i smiled n spoke my father was rushing so he just smiled.

    And at wedding hall all of us are busy running,they were worried that theya re not given front row seating,and they are not introduced to everyone along with my husband,and created a big mess ,and didnt attend the reception next day,they didnot even answer any of our calls.

    My father called them to put akshatas and take a snap thats not enuff for them.............crappy ppl...............The words they spoke about my aprents after that ,including my husband,(they just judged my aprents in couple of hours,when they knew him from years),i hate them for ever.But till today they blame my mother asking them why they didnot coem for re eption.............

    :bonk:rant
     
    Vaanii, Jul 5, 2013
    Vaanii, Jul 5, 2013
    #10

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