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Vacation To India Unneccessary Expense.

Discussion in 'Indians in the UK' started by Neelaa, Jul 18, 2019.

  1. Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    To avoid emotional abuse, it may be best that before marriage they discuss these issues; especially, if you are marrying a guy who is abroad OR not marry someone who is living abroad. "you can't have your cake and eat it too"
     
  2. PurpleRoses

    PurpleRoses Silver IL'ite

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    I disagree here. There have been many instances where irrespective of whether the guy is NRI OR RI, they agree to whatever girls say before marriage but later take U turn post marriage citing "reasons" to justify when questioned for the same.
     
  3. Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    It is best not to marry an NRI and for non-NRI make it clear in no uncertain terms that the things "you would not compromise or support" to the guy you are marrying. Marrying and being unhappy/fighting would impact the marriage for both in the long run and impacts children. Everyone deserves better.
     
  4. SinghManisha

    SinghManisha Platinum IL'ite

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    You truly do not have any idea how things work. Being in the US for 2.5 yrs is very different than staying here for a long time and dealing with visa and green card issues.
    Many of us have had to resist visiting our parents every year because of visa and GC issues. It is not because we love them any less than you love your parents.


     
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  5. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    Yes. Not everyone is honest.
    Many make false promises before marriage
     
    PurpleRoses likes this.
  6. BhumiBabe

    BhumiBabe Platinum IL'ite

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    Maybe I give people the benefit of the doubt, but I have seen men who think they earn like kings, promising the sky and the world to their brides. When reality sets in, and they realize the increased costs of living with a family, all the priorities shift. I’m sure some people make false promises, but others are just overconfident about their earning potential.
     
  7. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    True
     
  8. shalini79

    shalini79 Senior IL'ite

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    Actually, the travel restrictions that legal immigrants have to bear in order to get a visa extension or a GC were one of the reasons why my husband decided never to pursue that path. And I agreed with him completely. I could not imagine being put into a situation where our visa extension is in process and something unfortunate happens to our parents back home. To sit there half way across the world and thinking about consequences of going to India because our visas are under processing or some other challenge like that was unacceptable for me.
    Also, both the times we traveled back to India on vacation, we packed and said our good byes to our friends in US assuming that we will be denied entry into US when we come back. We have seen it happen to our friends. We have friends who are in the trap to get their GCs and could not visited India when their mom expired. At the this happened, we were not able to wrap our heads around the reasoning why they couldn't come for her mother's last rite. We still dont know if it was worth the sacrifice. But then, To each his own.

    For us, our families that is responsible for bring us into this world and sacrificing a lot to help us be what we are today, was more important than comfortable, pollution/corruption/tension free, seemingly happy life in US, and we chose that.
     
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  9. Topaz49

    Topaz49 Gold IL'ite

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    Nothing wrong with that as you both felt the same and in my view, it is very important both wanted the same. If this makes you both happy, it is the right decision for you.
     
  10. SinghManisha

    SinghManisha Platinum IL'ite

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    Good for you !
    Your response makes it seem like anyone that chose to stay in the US is selfish and does not fulfill their obligations towards their parents.
    I do more sitting here in the US than some of the sons and daughters that live in India. So it all depends.
    Your choice is your choice, don’t make it seem like the rest of us are any lesser because we chose to stay here.



     

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