Transition

@peartree,

I feel very blessed to get an opportunity to serve those people who are transitioning. You are right. Even in the service for someone, people always say he/she had gone to a better place.

As far as children's transition is concerned, it is the parents and grandparents who get devastated during the suffering of the child and untimely passing away of the child as well. I am unable to guess which one is more painful. It is really tragic for the elders to watch the children die due to terminal illness. The Hospice has an independent wing in only one care center and all the medical professionals, other care givers, social workers, volunteers, etc. are given independent training for handling the situation in this special wing. The goal is to keep the children as happy as possible till the end. They perform dance moves, never utter one word to show sympathy, lot of balloons for celebrations, lot of love and attention, lot of fun during feeding even if it is painful for children to digest, and treat them like friends.

I have watched my father deteriorate from diagnosis of chronic renal failure to dying over a period of 11 months. For two days after diagnosis, he didn't utter one word to anyone and then declared he was ready to go. He became normal and spoke to everyone. 6 months into the disease, he stopped talking with my mom. He held my hands everyday for 15 minutes before going to sleep and asked me to go to sleep in another bed placed in the same room at the other end. For a period of time, he was living as though he was going through his childhood, talked about his mother, father, brother and sister, incoherent words occasionally, unusual surge of energy with a bright face two days before his death, breathing pattern changed for 24 hours before death, on fluids only diet for 30 days and finally gasped a very long breath and stopped breathing. I was 33 years old at that time.

Viswa

 

@poovai,

It is god given opportunity to serve the people in need and is a great life experience for me. It is hard but the learning experience in this transition service is extraordinary. It teaches something important for me not to sweat on trivial things and love everyone when I can.

Thank you for your kind words and it means a lot to me.

Viswa

 

@Rihana,

It is true supply of volunteers is more than the demand but there are some special categories of services that is not preferred by many volunteers. For example, Patient & Family Care had 100 volunteers going through training whereas we had only 30 volunteers for transition training. For some strange reason, driving the passenger back home or to the Hospice is not preferred by many volunteers due to them falling or by mistake causing pain to the patient. However, some of the donations/grants are directly proportional to how many are volunteering in an organization. But I do have complaint about the Hospice as well. The place is extraordinarily clean but it also looks like a five star hotel indicating that the donations and grants are spent lavishly.

You are right about more Westerners volunteering than the eastern. They are also regular blood donators. I have observed there are many retirees, many teens but not many mid-age group volunteering. The category of volunteers among retirees are veterans, retirees who are living out of social security more than their savings, low to middle income group volunteers than middle or higher income group volunteers even if they are retired. A lot of who work two jobs are sparing time during their week-off days. Probably 30% of the volunteers are those who had their family in the Hospice before and after seeing the loving service, decided to volunteer for other patients later in their lives.

Viswa

 

Dear Hari Sir,

Thank you for your kind words, Sir. Transitioning period is the most uncertain period in life where a person realizes that most of what happens is not in their control. It is impossible to predict what runs in the mind of those who are transitioning. Some regret what they fail to do while others feel good about what they could accomplish. Those who feel bad about leaving their loved ones alone in this world, like them to be with them, while others who feel their loved ones are very well settled and could lead a comfortable life without them feel withdrawal from them will make them peaceful. As you know, in the US, aged group prefer to minimize the intervention of life of their next generation as much as possible. They actually request their loved ones to leave them under the Hospice Care once they are diagnosed with terminal illness.

The care plan prepared for each patient is very unique and different based on information gathered primarily from the patient and family members and also from medical professionals, social workers and spiritual counselors. The care plan customize the needs of each patient to the fullest extent and not necessarily thinking prolonging the life with medical intervention as the only option.

The only area where I found staff strength need to be increased is Registered Nurses. They work almost 12 hours a day and their stress level should be very high. Even though medical intervention in most cases is just pain management, the nurses physical availability give comfort to most patients. The adult children who can afford full time care givers on shift can take care of their parents at home itself. It is interesting to note that even very wealthy men and women prefer to be in the Hospice care as more people are available to assist. They also become great donors to the Hospice as well. I used to volunteer until 8 years ago but only for Patient & Family Care and not in the transition group and I found many writing their will in the care center allocating their assets to their children, grandchildren and charities.

Viswa