Thumbs Down To Thumbprint

SCSusila · Dec 13, 2017

jayasala42 said: ↑

Really an irritating business!
jayasala 42
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Yes ofcourse ! But like hard things in life , have to bite the bullet and go through it !

Thyagarajan · Dec 14, 2017

SCSusila said: ↑

When we changed residence recently , had to get address changed in the Aadhaar Card.

They said making demographic changes in Aadhar is easy and best place is the post office as there will be no queue . So went there.

The person in the Aadhar related cubicle looked at my old Adhar and then at me . Again. From card to me . From me to card .

" what madam ? " i asked .

" this picture does not look like you at all " she says , with disinterest , while giving me the application form.

Nobody looks like their Adhar or passport photos anyway. But she seemed to think my picture was unusually different from me.

Now i look at it . Definitely not me ! The person in the picture was plump with a hair bun and dark rings under eyes . And she was grouchy like she was ready to eat you up ! Eight months ago I was her . Today , I am not her. With a disgusted doctor driving me , and a long-suffering yoga teacher moulding me , I am 12 kilos thinner . My hair has got shorter and the black rings are gone. And am not in a grouchy mood.

" Yes, I have changed , Madam ! " I say , happily , "But my finger print will be same ! "

I sit down and put my thumb on the scanner . Once, twice, thrice . Authentication fails again and again.

Now madam is suspicious .

" Try the iris ! " i suggest, hurriedly . But this outlet has no iris scanner .

Silently she uploads my application form . Then asks : " is this how you always sign ? "

" yes, madam, why ? "

" it looks like a child copying some design "

I am hurt and dont like the insinuation in her words.

" oh, ok then check my signature in my PAN card " i say spiritedly and fish it out of my purse and flash it in her face . Me and my big mouth.

"Yeah , " she says , " it looks different "

Now i look at the PAN . OMG , the signature really looks different . The loop is not so long, the last two letters dont merge and the tail at the end is non existant . My PAN was made more than 8 years ago ! I was not senior citizen then and my hand was more steady .

She has finished uploading my application . " Address proof ? " she asks .

I give her our new lease deed .

" Rented house -ah ? ....who is this Lessee ? "

" my husband "

She checks my old Aadhar. " W/o Venka...." she starts reading , then checks the Lease deed , where there is no Venka...., only two initials K.V. behind the actual name . Now her suspicion seems to strengthen.

" oh, thats his expanded name in the Adhar " I inform her " in the lease , its his usual name "

" How many names ! " she sighs . " ok put your thumb again. One last try " she says tiredly . I press hard on the little scanner . 'Authentication failed'.

She is almost convinced i am impersonating.

Her colleague from across the aisle saves my honour : " She is old , na, thats why thumb worn out . Try other fingers "

Old ! Thumb Worn out ! I am ready to weep .

But meekly , i put my ring finger in the scanner .

Beeeep ! My phone rings in an " authentication succesful " message .

Madam and me , both are relieved .

" why dint you say at first itself, that your thumb has worn out ? " she demands .

"My thumb is not worn out ! ...here look ! " i thrust it out indignantly .

" see ? ... . Look at all the scratches and cuts across your fingerprint ! ..you are cutting vegetables carelessly or using the wrong kind of scrubbing-pad "

She hands me the acknowledgement and disappears into the backrooms.

I return home with a long face . Even my mother-in-law has never told me I cut vegetables carelessly .

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super humour in serious tidings. situation beautifully described one to one. the moral is to avoid ordeal "don't shift your residence if you had reduced or put on weight. anyway you got what you wanted with her handing you the acknowledgement.
Regards. God Bless us all.
Regards.

PushpavalliSrinivasan · Dec 14, 2017

@SCSusila
I enjoyed reading your post. Though the experience was frustrating for you, it was instrumental in writing a witty post.
PS

Cheeniya · Dec 14, 2017

@SCSusila
I won't say that I rolled on the floor laughing after reading your post. If I roll on the floor, three people would be needed to lift me up and put me back on my feet. But I loved this post. Queuing up for Aadhar Card has taught me what patience is all about. I just did the routine of grinning and bearing it. Humour is the best way to encounter humourless folks. You do it admirably!

Balajee · Dec 14, 2017

This aadhar is a curse. It is thr big-brother is watching stuff and impinges on individual liberties.

SCSusila · Dec 17, 2017

Thyagarajan said: ↑

super humour in serious tidings. situation beautifully described one to one. the moral is to avoid ordeal "don't shift your residence if you had reduced or put on weight. anyway you got what you wanted with her handing you the acknowledgement.
Regards. God Bless us all.
Regards.
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Thank you for response .
It was one battle won for me .
There are so many other linkings to be done , i am dreading it . Inebank made us do fingerprinting . Hope no otherservices will need it.

SCSusila · Dec 17, 2017

Cheeniya said: ↑

@SCSusila
I won't say that I rolled on the floor laughing after reading your post. If I roll on the floor, three people would be needed to lift me up and put me back on my feet. But I loved this post. Queuing up for Aadhar Card has taught me what patience is all about. I just did the routine of grinning and bearing it. Humour is the best way to encounter humourless folks. You do it admirably!
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Thank you very much for response .
"Adversities make better humans of us" . I dont know how far that is true , but no harm in believing that all such frustrations are making me better in addition to giving me ulcers and BP .

SCSusila · Dec 17, 2017

Balajee said: ↑

This aadhar is a curse. It is thr big-brother is watching stuff and impinges on individual liberties.
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Orwell is being remembered a lot these days thanks to adhar .
Like it or not, it is " voluntarily compulsory" and we are going through the grind .
Thankyou for response

SCSusila · Dec 17, 2017

PushpavalliSrinivasan said: ↑

@SCSusila
I enjoyed reading your post. Though the experience was frustrating for you, it was instrumental in writing a witty post.
PS
Click to expand...

Thank you very much for the kind words !
Cant bang head against a stone wall , so better laugh it off !