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Thumbs Down To Thumbprint

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by SCSusila, Dec 9, 2017.

  1. SCSusila

    SCSusila Gold IL'ite

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    When we changed residence recently , had to get address changed in the Aadhaar Card.

    They said making demographic changes in Aadhar is easy and best place is the post office as there will be no queue . So went there.


    The person in the Aadhar related cubicle looked at my old Adhar and then at me . Again. From card to me . From me to card .

    " what madam ? " i asked .

    " this picture does not look like you at all " she says , with disinterest , while giving me the application form.

    Nobody looks like their Adhar or passport photos anyway. But she seemed to think my picture was unusually different from me.


    Now i look at it . Definitely not me ! The person in the picture was plump with a hair bun and dark rings under eyes . And she was grouchy like she was ready to eat you up ! Eight months ago I was her . Today , I am not her. With a disgusted doctor driving me , and a long-suffering yoga teacher moulding me , I am 12 kilos thinner . My hair has got shorter and the black rings are gone. And am not in a grouchy mood.

    " Yes, I have changed , Madam ! " I say , happily , "But my finger print will be same ! "

    I sit down and put my thumb on the scanner . Once, twice, thrice . Authentication fails again and again.

    Now madam is suspicious .

    " Try the iris ! " i suggest, hurriedly . But this outlet has no iris scanner .

    Silently she uploads my application form . Then asks : " is this how you always sign ? "

    " yes, madam, why ? "

    " it looks like a child copying some design "

    I am hurt and dont like the insinuation in her words.

    " oh, ok then check my signature in my PAN card " i say spiritedly and fish it out of my purse and flash it in her face . Me and my big mouth.

    "Yeah , " she says , " it looks different "

    Now i look at the PAN . OMG , the signature really looks different . The loop is not so long, the last two letters dont merge and the tail at the end is non existant . My PAN was made more than 8 years ago ! I was not senior citizen then and my hand was more steady .

    She has finished uploading my application . " Address proof ? " she asks .

    I give her our new lease deed .

    " Rented house -ah ? ....who is this Lessee ? "

    " my husband "

    She checks my old Aadhar. " W/o Venka...." she starts reading , then checks the Lease deed , where there is no Venka...., only two initials K.V. behind the actual name . Now her suspicion seems to strengthen.

    " oh, thats his expanded name in the Adhar " I inform her " in the lease , its his usual name "

    " How many names ! " she sighs . " ok put your thumb again. One last try " she says tiredly . I press hard on the little scanner . 'Authentication failed'.

    She is almost convinced i am impersonating.

    Her colleague from across the aisle saves my honour : " She is old , na, thats why thumb worn out . Try other fingers "

    Old ! Thumb Worn out ! I am ready to weep .

    But meekly , i put my ring finger in the scanner .

    Beeeep ! My phone rings in an " authentication succesful " message .

    Madam and me , both are relieved .

    " why dint you say at first itself, that your thumb has worn out ? " she demands .

    "My thumb is not worn out ! ...here look ! " i thrust it out indignantly .

    " see ? ... . Look at all the scratches and cuts across your fingerprint ! ..you are cutting vegetables carelessly or using the wrong kind of scrubbing-pad "


    She hands me the acknowledgement and disappears into the backrooms.


    I return home with a long face . Even my mother-in-law has never told me I cut vegetables carelessly .



     
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  2. GeetaKashyap

    GeetaKashyap IL Hall of Fame

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    @SCSusila,

    Hahaha! Nobody's face matches with their Adhar card image and thank God for that! He made us better!

    Sometime ago, there was a WhatsApp message showing Bahubali hero Prabhas's Adhar card photo with a caption, ' Rajamouli makes him look like a king and Adhar makes him look like a begger!'

    Totally enjoyed the snippet.
     
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  3. joylokhi

    joylokhi Platinum IL'ite

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    Enjoyed your snippet:) Im sure you must have had a good laugh too, at the end although frustrated when the process was on!
     
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  4. SCSusila

    SCSusila Gold IL'ite

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    Thank you , Geetha , for saying you enjoyed the snippet .
    Hahaha, Prabhas getting Aadhar makeover ! I wonder what kind of webcamera the UDAI has provided . More like prank camera !
     
  5. SCSusila

    SCSusila Gold IL'ite

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    Thank you for the kind comment , Joylokhi !
    Yes it was quite an irritating experience whileit lasted , but afterwards , seemed quite funny !

    How much more frustrating it must be for people who might lose theitfingers or hands ! ....there was a report recently of leprosy patient who couldnt get Adhar and hence couldnt get her pension. Luckily , a press report helped . The govt immediately gave her a card on special grounds .
     
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  6. Agatha83

    Agatha83 IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Sushila,

    I faced similar problems while getting my mobile linked to Aadhaar . My thumb impression was not clear, what with my fingers shaking violently due to essential tremor. After half an hour, I could heave a sigh of relief when the ordeal was over and that night I could sleep peacefully. You have presented the entire scenario with a touch of humour, but actually such moments are very tense and makes us nervous.

    Agatha83
     
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  7. Jeeves

    Jeeves Silver IL'ite

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    Ha ha ha !! Enjoyed the narration !! Absolutely positive !! How can anybody compare the way we look now with the way we looked sometime back ?
    Gosh!! In my passport long ago I had black hair..Now it is all silver !! Well I have not yet been suspected to be an imposter !! I suppose, the best place we should stop in before we go to renew our aadhar or Passport,is the Beauty Parlour:)))
    Any way, I am happy you lost weight!! That is better than any info, here !

    Ha ha ha don't be cross with me..for a second I couldn't help recalling the Agony Aunt column!!!
     
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  8. jayasala42

    jayasala42 IL Hall of Fame

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    Really an irritating business!
    jayasala 42
     
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  9. SCSusila

    SCSusila Gold IL'ite

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    Thankyou for the response Agatha.
    Yes, it is indeed a hassle while it is happening. But later , while thinking of it , it seems funny !
     
  10. SCSusila

    SCSusila Gold IL'ite

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    Hahaha Jeeves ! I like that idea of visiting a beauty parlour to make ourselves look good in passport and adhaar photos ! UDAi can hire Professional photographers for a special service " Adhaar PhotoShoots" !
     

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