The man and the monkey!

Cheeniya · Nov 22, 2015

My dear OJ
You are talking about a much maligned monkey. For all the intimate knowledge of monkeys that I have, I can tell you with a great degree of conviction that the school boy has really twisted out of shape the tale of his tryst with the visiting monkey. I strongly believe that the monkey had nobler intentions than what the boy credited it with. The monkey probably slapped the boy whenever he tended to doze off in the middle of his studies. If the boy is obliged to narrate this tale to others, would he admit that he dozed off and the monkey woke him up with a slap? Won’t he become a subject of ridicule? I can’t buy his story that he was deeply engrossed in his studies. The monkey never returned probably because it felt hurt beyond words that its intentions were painted in dubious colours.

You seem to be a kick boxing aficionado. Kick boxers can aim a kick at the head of their opponent not with their hands but with their feet and they do it without losing their balance. This link of R.D.Burman is not probably adept in the art of kick boxing. I must tell you this about kick boxers. They can kick anyone anywhere in the torso but they cannot kick themselves. Reminds me of the limerick:
A canner, exceedingly canny,
One morning remarked to his granny;
‘A canner can can
Anything that he can,
But a canner can’t can a can, can he?’

I have been rambling for nearly a decade now but I have never heard of rambling being classified as relevant and irrelevant. All rambling is essentially irrelevant and pointless. That’s the beauty of rambling. If a rambler can be as appealing as the Fiddler on the Roof, it can only mean that his irrelevance has touched the peak. But irrelevance itself is highly subjective. All this talk about pressing randomly the keys of a 50 key typewriter a billion times to produce the word ‘banana’ may be highly relevant to a statistician but not to others. Why press the keys a billion times when all that is needed is to press it six times is a question that will occur to a non statistician. I know that statistics is very close to your heart and statistically correct random monkeys may excite you but folks like me will remain unmoved. I am not particularly fond of monkeys that waste their time on typewriters. They can instead do some social service by slapping youngsters who fall asleep while studying.

Listening to your talk on this subject, I am more and more inclined to believe that Shakespeare wrote all his works without knowing what he was doing. There is no wonder that the people who claim to have unraveled the mind of Shakespeare may only leave him baffled enough to make utterances like, ‘Fair is foul and foul is fair’. The chances of a young boy delivering a googly are much brighter than me understanding the Bard!

Jeeves, as far as I know, is a non smiling character. He emotes mostly through small variations in the position of his eyebrows. He is not blessed with a voice that is flexible enough to attempt giggling or singing. Jeeves’ comparison to statistical monkeys may be apt because many people tend to get irked by the methods he employs to extricate his master from seemingly impossible predicaments. I am one of them!
Sri

jayasala42 · Nov 24, 2015

Dear Cheeniya Sir,
I am sorry for coming back.Very often we used to enjoy the writings of the famous writer Sujatha in Tamil.Two days back I happened to read his small essay on 'evolution( parinaamam).
Had monkeys not been there, would not have human beings been born?he asks a question and answers that in all probability human beings might have taken after a particular dinosaur,which disintegrated millions of years ago.This is the opinion of two Canadian scientists specialising the subject.They have created a model of the human being having the ancestor as dinosaur and kept it in Canadian museum.
Here is a picture of the man according to the scientists.

Picture in Nature's Museum, Ottawa.
Cheeniya Sir,
On seeing the picture ,I thought we should be thankful to the monkey species for being our ancestors at least for our physical features.
Now reg the monkey and its back,on seeing OJ's tale ,I am reminded of an interesting episode.During a visit to a zoo, the visitors normally throw nuts to the monkeys.
A particular monkey used to take the nut to its anus and keep it there for a few seconds and then only ate the nut.All the visitors complained about this indecent behaviour of the monkey.
The warden of the zoo explained that a few days back the monkey accidentally swallowed a big nut.It suffered from stomach pain and the nut was blocking and it could not come out naturally through the excretory outlet.The nut had to be surgically removed. From that day onwards the monkey understood that there is some connection between the nut and the back.He started matching the size of the nut with its anus and took the nut only after satisfying itself.
I just thought that these two cases would be relevant to your ramblings.Sorry if I have gone out of tangent.

Jayasala 42

Cheeniya · Nov 25, 2015

Dear jayasala
It is indeed a big bonanza to get a third FB from you! I feel so gratified. I am an avid follower of Sujatha's writings. Whether it is a short story, a novel, sci-fi, essays on science and other subjects, he never failed to grip our attention. I have read the essay on Evolution that gave me a new perspective. While, by and large, people agree that humans may have descended from the monkeys, it does not stop the more enterprising from exploring other possibilities like lizards, porcupine and other weird animals.

The picture that you picked up from Ottawa Museum is not visible. Thus we have been denied of the opportunity of evaluating if the dinosaurs lineage is better than what Darwin has made us believe. The story about the monkey with a supposedly obnoxious habit of testing the nuts fed to it evokes a lot of sympathy in me. This is the case of 'once bitten, twice shy'. Instead of looking at it from the point of view of the agonising experience that the monkey had, preferring a complaint about the monkey's 'indecent behaviour' was the unkindest cut of all! This is a monkey that surely likes to be overly cautious but understandably so!
Sri

Viswamitra · Nov 27, 2015

Dear Cheeniya Sir,

What a snippet, Sir! I noticed it only yesterday and I spent considerable amount of time reading the responses here. I always keep the apes in high esteem after having close encounters in my young age at Thirumala-Thirupati Devasthanam as well as when my parents took me to Pazamuthirsolai. In Thirupati, one of them took two bananas I held in my hands and when I started crying, it threw one of them back to me either because the decibel at which I screamed was unbearable even to that Monkey or was simply trying to teach me a lesson or two about giving/sharing. In Puzamuthirsolai, my father was carrying the food pockets for our lunch and one of them held his dhoti strong enough to force him give away the food pockets. When I started aggressively pursuing the monkey despite by father's advice to let it go, I reached close to it only to see the full set of teeth of that monkey (probably imitating me how I look like in anger). It ran away after making fun of me. Both incidents proved to me that their IQ is much higher than what I possessed.

Whenever, I read spiritual literature, the learned people talk about controlling the monkey mind. I always wonder whether these Gurus were actually telling that monkeys do whatever they want without any control or giving invaluable advice that the monkey has the full potential to either indulge fully in pursuit of the worldly pleasure or achieve complete liberation, if they apply their intelligence.

The more we study the monkeys, less intelligent we feel. A Huffington Post report said, "Baboons can distinguish between written words and gibberish. Monkeys seem to be able to do multiplication. Apes can delay instant gratification longer than a human child can. They plan ahead. They make war and peace. They show empathy. They share." "It's not a question of whether they think – it's how they think," says Duke University scientist Brian Hare. Now scientists wonder if apes are capable of thinking about what other apes are thinking. The evidence that animals are more intelligent and more social than we thought seems to grow each year, especially when it comes to primates. It's an increasingly hot scientific field with the number of ape and monkey cognition studies doubling in recent years, often with better technology and neuroscience paving the way to unusual discoveries. Scientists mapping the DNA of the bonobo ape found that, like the chimp, bonobos are only 1.3 percent different from humans. Says Josep Call, director of the primate research center at the Max Planck Institute in Germany: "Every year we discover things that we thought they could not do."

When I agree with what Aldous Huxley said that the monkeys are perfectly capable of creating sonnets of Shakespeare, I strongly object to his words that they do it randomly. It is the human mind failing to understand the science behind their thinking believes that they can produce a great literature by typing randomly. Please don't think my last sentence is merely because of the attachment I have with my ancestors, I assure you that there is some solid experiences behind those words.

After reading about Anjeneya flying across the Indian Ocean to reach Sri Lanka crossing all the huddles he encountered, finding mother Sita in such a big island and give evidences that he is truly a Rama Bhaktha, put Sri Lanka on fire to teach a lesson to Ravana for his decision to lit his tail, tell Sri Rama in a few words that he found mother Sita, help Sri Rama build the Ramasethu across the peninsula to reach Sri Lanka, etc., how can I say these efforts are not based on intelligence?

I am on your side in thinking that the monkeys are the superior species and someday the man will become monkey. I rest my response with this but reserve my right to come again to present more evidences, if required, about my ancestors.

Viswa

Cheeniya · Nov 28, 2015

My dear Viswa
What a response this is! You remind me of Rajnikanth’s punch dialogue in the movie Baba ‘Naan latea vandhalum latest-a varuven’ (Even if I come late, I’ll be the latest!’) To tell you the truth, I had almost given up the hopes of getting your FB and I was feeling a bit disturbed. Of the handful of people who never fail to give me a FB, you have always been one and not getting one this time worried me sick. ‘Viswa is not probably in agreement with my views and instead of engaging me in a verbal dual like Adi Sankara waged against Mandanamisra, he has decided to keep quiet’ I thought. But I am now pleased beyond words! You not stand solidly behind my take on the subject but have come out with the latest evidence too.

You know Viswa, one does not have to go to Tirupathi or Pazhamudirsolai to seek to establish monkey’s superior IQ over human’s. The ones that parade through my street at fortnightly intervals are good enough for that purpose. We narrate stories ridiculing monkeys only to overcome our own intellectual deficiency. But evolved souls like Valmiki brought out the best of monkeys. For example, when we talk of communication skills, we always cite Hanuman’s ‘Dhrishta Sita’ as the best example. But we come across a better one when he observes Sita in Ashoka Vana. He knows that he must commence his communication with suitable words to convince Sita of his noble mission. He starts thus:
“There was a King called Dasaratha born in Ishvaku dynasty. He is extremely competent in chess. He is highly virtuous and intelligent. He is very honest, compassionate and celebrated by all. He is equivalent to that of saints in penance. He is equivalent to that of Indira in capabilities. Because of him there is prosperity all around in his kingdom. He is famous across the world. His eldest son goes by the name of Rama. Rama has a face equivalent to that of moon. He is the most competent among the wielders of Bow. He is a destroyer of the enemies, saviour of people who surrender him, saviour of all living beings on earth. He is brave and saviour of righteousness. To help his father keep a promise made earlier, he went on exile along with his wife Sita and brother Lakshmana. He killed many demons. Being angry with him, Ravana, who has the ability to take a form that he likes, took the form of a seer and abducted Sita.”
Sita gets instantly convinced that the words are narrated by someone close to Sri Rama as the Rakshasas would not know all these details of Rama.

I am happy to learn from the references that you have furnished that the man-monkey intellectual divide is getting diminished. There is no escape from the obvious. The humaneness of humanity can be restored only when we have more righteous monkeys than self-serving humans!
Sri

Lyraa · Nov 30, 2015

Dear Cheeniya,

When I saw the image of an ape few days back as Google doodle, I assumed your goofy snippet was recognized and honoured. No second thoughts! Cheeniya has irrecoverably confused people whether man evolved from monkey or monkey usurped man in arms race and Google could not resist to spotlight such endeavour. Though such monkey business is none of my business at all to poke my nose or flail my tail at such illuminating factoids, I was surprised the next day when I read

"However, a surprising number of people weren’t too pleased that Google was “glorifying” evolution and the idea that “we are monkeys,” along with a load of other misconceptions about evolution. Creationists, evolution-skeptics and, no doubt, some sarcastic trolls, hammered their keyboards to express their disdain – some even threatening to boycott the tech giant."

Such outrage cannot be generated from Cheeniya's post. Cheeniya's post?! His posts are usually ticklish, humorous, head-scratching but not demeaning to petite non-chordates like cockroaches or believers of exclusivity of man in tree of life. Then I realized that Google honoured "Lucy" with an animated doodle overlooking your expostulating post.

"On November 24, they celebrated the 41st anniversary of “Lucy’s” discovery, a hugely important milestone in our understanding of human evolution."

Such a shame! The world felicitates the works of Charles Darwin and Alfred Russel Wallace in bringing evolution to the fore of scientific community but what about this amusing collaboration of Cheeniya and Ojantrik in providing explainer for devolution of man or superiority of ape or interstitial tarzan or mowgli. By the way was it a baboon or chimpanzee which flexed its fingers to tap away as shakespearean classic. No one raised that point! I've not read all the posts because I had side-splits in page#2 and never imagined I would be stitched up in this manner by these vanar veterans of the forum. Chuck those "like" , "thumbs up" buttons, has anyone requested in "Suggestions and Feedback" for "whoops" and "screeches" as multimedia to root, peel and pamper such interactions between CN and OJ.

Cheeniya · Dec 1, 2015

Dear Lyraa
Please do not rule out the possibility of Google amplifying my postulates with a doodle some day in the near future. Lucy’s discovery is not a milestone in our understanding of human evolution. Lucy was a classic piece of evidence in simian evolution. Why do humans have to be overbearingly presumptuous that the long trial of evolution has come to a conclusion with their advent on the scene? And that too after watching Lucy and the like in action! It is not surprising that a surprising number of people were not too pleased with the glorification of Lucy. These people do not really know where they are in the evolution chain or in other words whether they are going away from or towards Lucy.

OJ is always in his element when discussing monkeys. When he first mentioned in a WhatsApp chat about the monkey that could type out the works of the Bard with its eyes closed, he was sounding so animated and I could make out instantly that here was a man who could be persuaded to collaborate with me in rewriting the theory of evolution. He had such intimate knowledge of simian traits that I knew would help me in taking my research further.

Incidentally I must tell you that it could only be a chimpanzee that flexed its fingers to type out the Shakespearean classics. The baboon is still way behind in the chain of evolution. In fact, an extract from the article that I could lay my hands on says this:

“This chimpanzee-baboon difference illustrates what some primatologists call the “cognitive watershed”: the idea that, as a pattern, our closest living relatives, the great apes (chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans), are more highly skilled at problem solving and complex thinking than are the monkeys (baboons, macaques, howler monkeys, squirrel monkeys, and their relatives)”
Sri

MULLAI62 · Jan 23, 2016

Dear friends,
I have attached the regular monkey visitors to our garden. U could find one is sitting at the terrace, it will eat only if we put the food on terrace. I learnt a lot from monkeys.
No sharing
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They wont share the food. First the male dominate, which it leaves, the rest will be taken by the female monkey. Even the mother wont share with the child. They have to chase their own.
Cleaning
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They will be friendly only when they clean their bodies. each help other to clean.
Food
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They eat regularly, papaya leaves, Nandhiyavattai leaves, thulasi, and drink the juice from plantain kuruthu. Very fresh fruits & vegetables from trees. The bad thing is it wont take fully, just bite and throw. Mostly here they eat raw. Then they smell the food and then start eat. Like bananas, ground nut. I think thatswhy they live healthy, jumping and live longer.
Saving food
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You could watch in one photo, it collects the food in kadavai and then sit and eat slowly. So no hurry in eating. No excitement, no ulcer.
No sixth sense
=========
Its a great shock to me. One monkey gave birth a child. After 2 days I could find the child dead. But the mother monkey was dragging it with her till it turned to pieces. I was seeing more than 15 days. It doesnt know it was dead but it touches it as it was alive. It wont allow us to touch. Pathetic.
Love
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It also expects to treat with love. If we throw the food it will show its teeth. It expects respect.
Time
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One leader is there. If it moves all the monkeys follow it. After 5 they will vacate the place whatever may be.Prompt in time.

In many cases they are very intelligent, alert, awareness in taking food, independent, lovable( depends on us), timing, follow the elders, let the children to grow independent( not protecting)

Monkeys ......... They taught me a lot.........................................

Cheeniya · Jan 23, 2016

Dear Mullai
I do not know if you meant this to be an FB to my Rambling but I am really grateful for the wealth of information on our simian kin. Your revelations show how intimate is your knowledge of them. The mutual cleaning is something that promotes harmony amongst monkeys is something that explains the bonhomie that prevailed in Roman and Greek senators' community bathing!

What is most interesting in your FB is about the simian food habits. I have always been maintaining that in the chain of evolution, monkeys come after us and not before. I am happy that your FB proves just that.
Sri

Elphaba · Jan 31, 2016

Cheeniya,

I made a post in "snippets" 5 minutes ago and received a notification "Sent to moderator for approval". I cannot access PM, the interface looks slightly different (limited options) for a newbie to contact admin. Would appreciate if you can verify what happened to that thread. Ouch! I don't even have a copy or draft anywhere. Thank you!

Yours Frothy,
you-know-who