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The (im)purity of having your period...I just don't get it

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Bubbles25, Sep 18, 2013.

  1. thegirlygirl

    thegirlygirl Platinum IL'ite

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    dear op,

    this is a tough one. it's very difficult to change the beliefs that have been ingrained into someone's mind since childhood.

    although we understand that scriptures don't allow us to perform religious activities during our periods, it still hurts when family members discriminate and especially when they make us feel like dirt.

    if your dh has been taught not to perform any religious activities, when a woman in the family is menstruating then it's his belief, and i think you should respect that.

    if at all he ill treats you during your periods, then explain to him that you don't like it, and it hurts you. ask him you would like him to support you and care for you during this time, and you least expect him to look down on you.

    as for your daughter, you still have a long way to go, you will slowly mange to change lots by then.
     
  2. Radhai

    Radhai Platinum IL'ite

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    what if the wife has been taught the opposite.. who do you think should respect her belief?
     
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  3. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    @OP, it is a tough choice you have - put up a major fight / resistance / protest ...... whatever, face the consequences of being branded a Jezebel OR put up with the status quo.

    I would suggest not to tell anybody if that is possible. Of course obvious questions will be asked and then you are back to choice 1.
     
  4. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    It is hard to accept this explanation. It is understandable and admirable if society felt the need to give a menstruating woman rest from her heavy daily chores. But where did the need to treat her as "dirty", "impure", as an untouchable come from? That is far from acceptable. If someone is very ill, you give them rest, look of them, care for them, not throw them in a corner of the house and treat them like something the cat brought in and forgot to take back with it when it left. So why not give her rest and treat her well?

    OP, another thought occurred to me. Does your husband "allow" you to cook and do all housework during this time? If so, why? What happened to the "noble" intention of giving the woman complete rest? Tell him that you should not be "allowed" to do any work in the house including looking after your daughter during that period. Ask him to take care of everything including cooking, cleaning, getting little one ready to go to school ....... on his own. See if practices and customs change or not.
     
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  5. satchitananda

    satchitananda IL Hall of Fame

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    Poovai, who was responsible for this humiliation / indignation? God? Or the human beings around? So where does the question of messing with God come in? If God felt this was dirty, impure, don't you think God would have a better way of perpetuating human kind than to fill His/Her universe with such "filth" as menstruating women?
     
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  6. thegirlygirl

    thegirlygirl Platinum IL'ite

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    simple, she can continue the way she wants, performing religious activities during her periods. why enforce her views on others?
     
  7. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    To quote OP:
    ...my husband (who is religious) won't do his daily pujas if I have my period. And he insists that I wash my hair on the fourth day so that he can go about his religious duties.

    1. Would you like it if when you enter a room people stop talking? Or, if when you enter a house, they move some items so your presence does not corrupt those?
    OP's husband is not doing his daily pujas when she is having her period.

    After the above:
    2. He is insisting that she wash her hair on the fourth day.
    Isn't such insistence equivalent to enforcing his views on her?
     
  8. Radhai

    Radhai Platinum IL'ite

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    I am lost.. so who is enforcing the views on others here.. the wife (OP) or her Husband?
     
  9. Visu2k

    Visu2k Gold IL'ite

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    The blood and the uterine lining that get discharged during menstruation are basically what would have been the support system and nourishment of a potential (unborn) baby. If periods are impure, then we all are born impure, every innocent new born is impure, as that is how we all started our lives, inside the uterus feeding on impurities.

    I can't imagine how people who are educated could associate such an important and essential body function with being impure.
     
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  10. Anitap

    Anitap IL Hall of Fame

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    Round two begins. :)
     
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