After my younger one's birth, at it was difficult to balance work & home . So I quit my demanding MNC job for the sake of kids thinking let me have a career break...i also had the feeling of stagnation at work so thought after break will try harder to get better..but with 2years long break and one failed attempt to get back to work .. I have lost my confidence... Every day I feel I am sinking in depression thinking I am neither a good home maker and failed unemployed professional... I dont know where to go and what to do.. stress is still not leaving me..tried medication, meditation but all is helping for short term and again all back to square.
Hi OP, One failed interview is nothing to consider, it happens to everybody. So please don't loose faith/confidence. 1. create a very nice linkedin profile, daily work on it by adding little , little. Recruiters will start sending mails, talk to them and be in touch. 2. do some certifications or courses related to your area of work. Be fully knowledgeable in your area. Prepare well for interviews. If subject wise you have full command then you can ace interviews. Buy books or read online. 3. read in forums/ join linkedin groups related to the subject where real work related problems are projects are discussed. 4. Do this type of work daily as you were going to office, i.e 8-5. Don't put your energy anywhere else in this time, send kid to day care and do your work/interview related research. searching for a job itself is a job. Keep talking in phone with recruiters or related consulting firms. 5. Important one, let all your contacts/friends/dh colleaguesor his friends know that you are in job market. They will surely arrange some interviews if they have any in their offices. 6.
Dear Challenge, Can understand your situation. One interview failure is not a BIG LOSS. Always COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS rather than worrying abt your failure. This positive spirit itself would soon fetch you a good job. When you start taking up a job, You will miss your Kids and might even feel guilt. Suggest to look for Part Time Jobs [May be little lower in grade than your last job] and keep a balance of both. Read some books related to technology or Training. Also don't miss the time you have got with your family. Spend wisely and qualitively. Unless and otherwise its a must and necessity for you to take up a job on monetary aspects, do upgrade your skills through training firms and start exploring opportunites. All The Best!!
Hi OP, Why do you belittle yourself? You have done an excellent job so far, taking a break from work, and raising your child for two years giving them the love and care they deserve.. Lots of women would love to be in a position where their financial/family status allows them to take time off for their kid. So what you have done so far doesn't seem like a failure to me, but just success and good thinking. Now that you kid is older, you can think of getting back to work, and Kashmir flower has given wonderful tips to help you with that. As for your depression, stop thinking this break as a failure, as this will continue to bring down your self confidence and definitely the interviewers can easily pick up on that. Instead be sure of your choices, and say that you had this planned well, and this break was worth it and now you are excited to be back to work to take more challenges!
Hi Challenge , I also quitted my MNC job when my son was little and thought I would take a short break from work. Haha.. yes short break...But you know, that short break became veryyyyy long - as my DH moved to US on H1 and I became H4 ( Dependent Spouse ). After getting familiar with US lifestyle , driving and everything , I tried for H1 Sponsor crazily and then got a job finally. You know what , i was planning for a short break of 1 or 2 years and to get back to work. But I was able to catch up with my career only after 7 long years. And that period was so depressing and challenging. But I just overcome with it by socializing ... yes believe me , talk to friends and your well wishers. Also when you have plans to come back , pl consider to upgrade yourself with latest technologies that you can command with. Don't feel sad or bad for ONE FAILED INTERVIEW. You know what , I have given atleast 15 or 20 interviews to get back to this job. Believe Me ! ALL POWER IS WITHIN YOU ! YOU CAN DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING ! Finally , on looking back , one thing I can proudly say I spent quality and good time of my son's childhood. I'll never feel guilty for that. Career / Work - we can catch up any time . But missing your kid's childhood years is not worth of anything ! So , COME ON... BE BOLD N BEAUTIFUL... Life is to live... not to worry... I'll tell you one more thing , I got some visa issues now and guess what , I may not be working for some more time ( God Knows , how long yumsmiley ). But I'm sure , I'll come back after any huddle... Be confident and good luck with your job search ...hugsmiley
Thank you all lovely ladies for your advice, suggestions... My concern is about balancing home n work now specially after 2 kids.. With one kid and full time reliable domestic help i could work at stretch for 5years intially ...but things changed later with 2nd child and domestic help issues I decided to quit ...Financially it was not a big issue for DH however has affected our saving part..so cutting down on expenses, entertainment and other luxuries we could enjoy while I was working.. I can not think of day care or domestic help until I start working again ... My failed attempt was not of interview but to work... I managed to get a job at junior level after 8months of rigorous efforts ...I had a bad phase with frustration of 5months at work and inability to balance home n work life so much so that I was told discontinue and leave before probation itself... Since then I have lost my confidence..In fact with the gap of again 9 months after I am not even getting intw call..I took paid professional help to prepare my profile again updating linked in profiles, also passed out one reputed certification with lot of hard work.. but not a single suitable opportunity ...somehow I am feeling my energy and ethu of starting & struggling all over again has vanished...and its end of my career for the whole life.. Even during this break. with all my efforts to enjoy this phase with kids, I get the panic attacks, get anxious and suffocated..I still can not sink in homemaker life of cooking and cleaning. When I see other friends of mine around similar phase I see them easily accommodating with changes..But I wonder what is wrong with me ...why I am not enjoying cooking for family, cleaning messy home, washing dirty laundry every day...Why I am dragging myself to do that...keep thinking is it just a phase or will keep on doing same thing all my life.. am I born and living only to do this... I feel I am hanging in between not a good home maker or not a good professional...after years of proving myself a superwoman I have become burnt out case. after facing 2 major career breaks in my life (1 after overseas move and other after 2nd child), staring all over again has become herculean task for me.. I am sorry I am sounding too negative but jus venting out my emotions. Cant talk to parents as they are already upset with me on decisions to quit jobs (however were/are not ready to help me as support system after kids) in laws were always against my working and are happy that I am finally in housewife mode (asking their help is inviting more troubles) while DH is quiet neutral on me being working or house wife but have to show him the happy face as he keep saying me take ownership of whatever you decide and handle.. I feel totally helpless...
Whatever u r feeling is natural....first of all remove this thought that u r a failed homemaker....u don't want to be a homemaker this y u don't enjoy cooking n cleaning....in fact don't try to like cooking cleaning and try to be homemaker u don't want to.... Sometimes it can be difficult to get back to work after break but its not impossible....just keep on trying with full focus...see if u can put ur kids to daycare....take this expense as investment.... Please see if for the time being u can get a job even if it is lower than before...at least it will give us start n boost ur confidence.... I think u need to lower ur expectations from yourself...give yourself some discounts and be easy at u...
Learn to love your life. Whatever it may be. You were a working woman, and you loved working so you progressed well there. Then you became a mom, home-maker plus a working woman. So, balancing wasn't easy for you. You decided to quit. Fine. Then you stayed at home, and tried to be a house-wife. It seems it is not your passion about. So, you obviously tried to get back to work. But in fact, you failed to make a balance between work and life before committing at the work place. That unfortunately forced you out of your job. You regret for this, and make up your profile for better opportunities now. In this job seeking process, have you done anything to balance your work and life, so that your new job won't be affected with your responsibilities at home. I mean, have you found a reliable day care or nanny for your kids while you go out for work? Have you learnt fast cooking, i.e cooking 3 or 4 meals within 1-2 hrs in the rush mornings together with all the other chores that may arise. So simple recipes, fast cleaning, making ready to cook, ready to serve yet nutritious meals are important. Getting husband's help at indoor level, thus training him on this. Training kids about punctuality and being discipline. To be vocal, and expressive about their day at day care or with nanny when they meet you Learning to drive (if you are not already) Distributing house hold chores to weekends, and nights without affecting your schedule Setting up a nanny cam at home (if allowed) There are so much that you need to be prepared before taking up an outside job. Else, you will struggle and confuse as to how to balance everything. You may be excused for not being a complete house-wife, but not every company excuse their staff who struggle to complete their tasks on time. Better prepare instead of dwelling in depression.
Dear, I will only reiterate that it is going to take a while to find a good opening. For some who search, it might happen within weeks, but that need not be the case for everyone. I find that these days networking gives you a better chance to get hired. Connect with other professionals in your field in LinkedIn, and follow companies that you wish to join. This will definitely get you some visibility. Keep posting, this also helps. At the same time, update your naukri and monster etc. profiles every week. It helps if you update it on Sunday evening or Monday morning, so that your profile comes on top of the search list. Pick up something part time if that comes your way, so that at least you will be back in circulation. In the meantime, take some online courses to brush up your skills. Lynda.com is a good place that you can check out. Apart from that, there are plenty of startups in the market. Catch hold of them and try to apply. Start-ups are more flexible in terms of work from home, flexible hours etc. And there will surely be openings. Remember, this can take time, so set your sight on the goal, and keep trekking! All the best, you will soon make the cut! Have faith.
Thank you all ! All your positive thoughts are helping me out to come out of all negativity. I am trying my best to find ways out hope and pray for the best.
