Special love and care

Discussion in 'Pregnancy & Labor' started by Parukutts, Jan 28, 2012.

  1. Parukutts

    Parukutts Bronze IL'ite

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    Hii,
    I am 8 weeks pregnant and here in us.just me and my husband. Today specially I am very sad it's been a week and no one has called me checking about me.i am struggling each day with my first trimester physical and mental problems. I have strong aversions to all kinds of rice and curries and I can't stand the smell or en of anything of those.i have some terrible metallic kind of taste in mouth which makes my aversion to food even strong.all I can eat is fruits and sour things.i lost my apetite but I think y body is starving I get gas all the time and nausea just got promoted to with vomiting from without vomiting. I have all kinds of mood swings and the cloudy foggy weather plays a big part of it.my nausea is getting worse everything ,even food network channel makes me pukes.along with all of this I am totally worried And confused about what to cook what to eat,Icant cook I can't stand the smell of raw onions and cooking.i don't feel like talking to anyone,ut husband all he does is clean kitchen and comes home asking ME what to eat ,he is hungry it seems ! What can I say! I have heard stories about how loved ones pamper you with help and love and care. There is cousin who calls me every week and now it's seems she is keeping a distance from.never calls and ask how I am keeping up.advices or tips or anything... My parents and neither my in laws cals me and asks.. I could call them but I am as healthy and mentally ecstatic right now to call and shower them with love.....why don't I ever get loved or showered with love care for a change ? I really envy all pregnant women surrounded by loved ones and people with good heart rather than ego andselfishness... :(
     
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  2. vidhyalakshmid

    vidhyalakshmid IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi,
    I completely understand your situation.I also sailed in that same boat as like you, 6 years ago. Your post brought my sour memories back. Nobody took care of me and I never talked to anybody upto 4 or 5 months. Only good thing I had done was the prayers, prayers and prayers. It is the way we are brought into this world. I used to watch so many tamil movies (2 per day) to divert my mind and body on the suggestion of my hubby. Focus your mind in your hobbies like reading your favourite books. All will go well and keep up your spirits high.
    If you strongly believe in God, do some chantings of God`s names. God helps to those who helps themselves.
     
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  3. KalpanaJay

    KalpanaJay Junior IL'ite

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    Congratulations on your pregnancy. Don't worry dear. This is the time to be happy and relaxed. I can understand your situation. Try to take atleast fruits and veggies. After first timister, i think you will be all right. Mood swing is very common in pregnancy. Also in US, you will definetly feel the loneliness. Here everyone is busy with their work. So try to engage yourselves in some activites like watching movies, reading novels etc whichever you like. Don't worry about ppl not calling you.
    Also ask you DH to help you in the kitchen. Without help, its hard to manage. make him understand your situation. As other friend suggested spend time in prayers, prayers will give you the peace you are expecting. Take care
     
  4. HuggleBuggle

    HuggleBuggle Bronze IL'ite

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    Divert yourself as how the previous posters mentioned. Otherwise the pregnancy hormones, lack of energy makes you think & feel worse. For your husband bring some instant foods & keep them in the freezer. He can easily make them when he comes. The good options which you also can eat them are like
    1)Stir fry vegetables(you can get in sam's club in the freezer section along with the sauce in it)
    2)Bread-which can be toasted or not & then add some peanut butter,jam,pickles,lettuce. Tastes good too. Whole wheat bread better than our white rice.
    3)Soup mix or home made soup with chicken/veg stock & some vegetables, salt, pepper. Good for cold weather.
    4)Boiled egg whites with some salt & pepper on it. Or try Devil/Evil eye eggs dish(Tasty one if you like to eat egg yellow).
    Ask him to help you once he had some snacks. Or help him in cutting veggies & ask him to cook in the weekends that is sufficient for at least 3-4 days.
    Also if your cousin doesn't have kids yet, she might not know the problems you are facing. If not like that don't think about anything. Take care of your self. If possible start writing up your pregnancy journey.
     
  5. lochu

    lochu Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Parkuuts

    Congrats on your pregnancy ad it totally normal to feel that way .8 weeks is the peak time for Nausea don't worry .Its just the hormones that is making you feel low and all these thinsg come up .If you cannot keep up with foods and food smell then don't cook .take out but if you have to then cook only once and make it simple as much as possible like baln crabohydrates like rice ,oatmeal ,idly dosa .I am pregnant right now and in 17 weeks and still have nausea and vomitting .It will get better in 12 weeks so 4 more weeks hang in there .ask your DH to open the cooker .when I cook I keep the windows open and and tried to cook all no spicy balns foods for 3 months and worst case if you cannot keep any food with you then call your doctor and get a prescirption for zofran or reglan both these medications are safe and help with vomitting some people use vitamin b-6 as well .

    There were days when I cannot eat anything and I use to just sip on ice chips just to keep me out of dehydration so you are not alone .Take care .
     
  6. Parukutts

    Parukutts Bronze IL'ite

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    Thanks all...yes I feel better, maybe I just needed to vent out.yes US life is lonely life..but still I can't understand why no one cares about me.maybe I was been filmy and stuff like this rarely happens in real life.husband is becoming more understanding day by day but his heart is not always here,either thinking about job or green card. But yeah I ought to be optimistic maybe he will change once I get belly :) yes I am praying but I had a habit of lighting lamp every evening and doing my japa daily . But once nausea started the peak time is always from 3 or 4 pm till bed time. So I don't usually light lamp now ,but when ever I close my eyes I make it a point to remember all my deities at hometown and do mantra chant and pray.foods I have total aversions to healthy foods..I will your suggestions ,I have lost my apetite.but all these problems just vaporize when I see the baby in ultrasound.
     
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  7. SUBHAARCHIE

    SUBHAARCHIE Gold IL'ite

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    HI PARU,
    Hi Paru,
    Same here too...i am in my 10th week of pregnancy....no body to help in household...have to cook breakfast,lunch and dinner for the entire family...even if i am unable to get in the morning...only i have to do the work...and no help...from inlaws...atleast my husband take cares of me...and shares some responsibilities in household jobs....My BIL will be eating my head right from the morning...i have to switch on the heater...prepare breakfast fro him...pack his lunch...real hectic...After that laundry,cleaning and washing ...etc...etc..no rest ...no proper sleep too...but its all a part and parcel of life...i just take it that way...
    My husband will get eatables (all that healthy stuff) and tell that its not for you...its for my baby with a naughty smile in his face in the evening...it happens almost everyday....i wait for and enjoy that moment....
     
  8. vishuni

    vishuni Silver IL'ite

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    Hi paru and Subha

    Congratulations on Pregnency!!

    Harmones rules us in pregnency.Dont bother about these mood swnigs..Just think a't u r liitle bundle of joy
     
  9. Parukutts

    Parukutts Bronze IL'ite

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    Subha ,
    I feel you...atleast we have our husbands who care about us, that's what is keeping us strong. Find time to take rest.... Idea , fake dizziness ,go unconscious... I hope that would make them understand ;) I watch too much of movies lol he he :) over here it's the same.. I don't feel like calling or talking anyone... Too depressed for that.i don't have no job,no friends around ,no car to go around and I havents informed the news to most friends so can't lie so I don't login into chat nowadays. I am waiting for my 12 weeks. Neither my parents nor his parents havent asked abt me or given a miss call. Till I got preg ,his parents used to come on Skype and every one used to sit in front of camera with my preg co sister and keep talking and cracking jokes and I felt they were showing their happiness to us, it used to look festive there,sometimes I used to feel bad coz I was trying hard to get preg. I thought when I get preg his parents would love m the same way, guess what they havents come online not once after I got preg. The computer is always with husbands brother and wife . I don't if thy are the ones trying nt o communicate or it's in laws ...anyway it broke my heart. Why I am so desperate ??? :( I used to care less and enjoy in our own way ...now everything is making emotional...blame it on hormones I guess !
     
  10. Parukutts

    Parukutts Bronze IL'ite

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    Thanks vishuni !
    Thanks lochu ,he helped make egg curry ystdy ,I couldnt stand the smell. I kept smelling and licking the lemon wedge :)
    Thanks hugglebuggle I m taking in your suggestion, I am having bread jam in morning , have to make dosa batter ths weekend .its not my cousin it's hs cousin ,but we are very very close she has 2 kids but she Is a thrifty kind of person,she will never do an help or anything which will she will have to spend money,that's what my usband say abt her and nowadays I am beginning to understand.

    Thanks kalpana :) I will take care.
    Vidyalakshmi Im so relieved there is someone who felt like me,thanks !
     
    Last edited: Feb 1, 2012

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