Somemore Stupid Questions, and Great Answers!

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by sudhavnarasimhan, Mar 29, 2006.

  1. sudhavnarasimhan

    sudhavnarasimhan Silver IL'ite

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    9 THINGS I HATE
    is the caption for this fwd! Enjoy these!

    1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time...
    I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
    2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change the channel manually.

    3.
    When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too".
    Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

    4.
    When people say "it's always the last place you look".
    Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it?

    5.
    When people say while watching a film "did you see that?".
    No Loser, I paid Rs.125 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

    6.
    People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"....
    Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

    7.
    When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

    8.
    When people say "life is short".
    What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

    9.
    When yo u are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?".
    If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

     
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  2. prathi

    prathi Bronze IL'ite

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    so stupid!!!!!

    Ha ha ha

    i had a good laugh and laughed very loud reading the first thing i hate .....my neighbours might be here anytime to check on me... see ya...:clap
     
  3. varalotti

    varalotti Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hilarious, Sudha!

    Dear Sudha,

    Had a hearty laugh before I called it a day. Very good ones. Very sharp retorts. Coming to retorts I remember an old dentist of the town asking me,
    "Sridhar, at last, you are his son, eh?"
    ("kadasila nee avaru pillaya?)
    ""No, Doc. I am his son right from the beginning.
    ("mudalenthe naan avaru pillai than)

    Churchill was once accosted by a ferocious woman MP during the question hour. The MP told the Prime Minister,
    "If I am your wife, I would give you poison.."
    "And if I were your husband, I would rather take it.

    And there is this most stupid question posed especially in Madurai.
    The villager asks the conductor.
    "When is the next bust to Koomapatti?"
    "3 PM."
    "Is there any bus before that?"
    Had there been a bus before that, would not the conductor say that?

    regards,
    sridhar
     

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