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Some Marriages: What Do You Think

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by hermitcrab, Dec 20, 2016.

  1. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Gold IL'ite

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    Warren Buffet is a well regarded person categorized as Inpirational, calm and collected person.
    But have you guys heard the story of his marriage?
    He is married to his to first wife, while he stays with his wife's friend...

    What is your take on this marriage.
     
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  2. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    Looks like he is a regular human being with regular problems. He remained married to his first wife till her death in 2004. In 2006, he married his longtime companion Astrid Menks. This relationship had the blessing of his first wife, and for a while before her death, cards from the Buffett family went out signed "from Warren, Susie and Astrid". Susie (first wife) was glad that Astrid took good care of Buffett. The affair that was a factor in Susie's moving away was with Katharine Graham. Susie told friends she was furious and humiliated but also sent a written letter to Katherine giving her permission to date Buffett. Buffett was 46 and Katharine was a 59 year old widow when the affair started.


    Warren Buffett Admits Regret Over Wife's Departure In New Biography - NY Daily News
    How many times has Warren Buffett been married?
    Amy Argetsinger and Roxanne Roberts - What Really Happened When Warren Met Katharine
     
  3. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Gold IL'ite

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    Lot more details to ponder on.
    My take on W.B. marriage is:

    Like you said, high and mighty also have personal problems.

    For Men- who achieve a lot- are termed Success- it is hard to have one marriage in one life time.

    Women-who achieve a lot- are married once- or stay single

    If one wants a happy married life, stay away from high-achievers (men or women).

    We heard a lot of rumors about Amitabh B's affairs, and how in his younger days, he ruined many of his coworkers lives.

    And take a look at our politician Jay L., she had to stay single.

    Anyone, who is in a "married" relationship with a super success will be unhappy.
     
    Last edited: Dec 20, 2016
  4. rajatsingh

    rajatsingh Silver IL'ite

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    An unfair generalization !
     
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  5. momsky

    momsky Gold IL'ite

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    Same goes for those who are married to poor, under-achievers, and delinquents.
     
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  6. bruised234

    bruised234 Gold IL'ite

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    You shouldn't be saying "happy married life" more like "settled married life", high achievers expect their partners to be high achievers as well, they start monitoring the partner's lives. The partner should not get used to the monitoring and should be self-reliant. Once you get into the "settled" mode with such people, trouble starts, because they might stop taking interest if they find the partner is not a "challenge" anymore. That leads to looking for newer conquests. If people find happiness in challenges then they will be happy with such people, but if they are the "I want to settle down" kind of people, then yes, it will eventually make them unhappy. It is a tough call because at some point in one's life, the person might feel they have had enough, it is tough to keep going on and on throughout their life especially with a competing partner. It becomes stressful at some point. So yes, in totality I agree with you that it is better to keep away from high achievers unless you are a high achiever yourself. The catch is in accepting that fact and doing it at the right time - before entering into a relationship with such people.
     
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  7. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Gold IL'ite

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    Like Trump said to his wife, first wife: there can be only one star in marriage.

    High achievers, usually look for mediocre people to be their partner. They do not want challenge, at home.
    They do not want someone to keep up with them, they try to keep the other person down, eventually the distance between the two becomes a lot and the 'successful' party usually says- she couldn't keep up with me.

    In case of a successful women, like our many politicians, they just have to wear orange color cloths or take the role of 'amma'.

    It is generalization, but true in 80%
    Hilary and her husband are in 20%
    Still married...with many affairs on the side.

    There's another generalization here:
    US politicians like to stay married with original spouses and US celebrities change spouses. Both have affairs
    Now, Trump is an 20% , celebrity turned politician.

    I believe poverty to be a real motivator, I don't look it as something really bad. But a person who has some kind of addiction, will also make a very unhappy marriage, true.
    Though, an unmotivated person may be okay in a marriage, even an happy marriage.

    Some of my friends knew this at 16 years of age, do not marry a very ambitious man, or in a very rich families.

    Of course, every one is entitled to their opinion. It is my opinion. Please pour in thoughts, good bad and the ugly, it is a discussion... we do not have to reach on verdict, either.
     
  8. Joyoflife

    Joyoflife Gold IL'ite

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    Regardless of a persons financial status if a marriage is long and without EMAs it's doesn't mean that marriage is happy. Each and every marriage needs work in its own way and that's what makes it a happy marriage. Only difference in the wed lock of celebrities/ billionaires/ multi millionaires and common mango people is that they have the option of walking out of the marriage without considering kids/ societal pressure/ cultural pressure/ parental pressure. It's first time I came across something like demotivated/ unambitious/ people with poor mental and financial structure bring more security to marriage than the successful ones. Really ?
     
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  9. hermitcrab

    hermitcrab Gold IL'ite

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    I strongly believe that a driven person paired with a more subdued one, will make for a happy marriage.
    A ambitious person, may not make a good life partner and also a person who more of an unambitious kinds, can be a very good life partner and may make a very good marriage- full of happy children.

    Jaya B.'s marriage and Hilary's marriage are similar. Would they have been happier with a mediocre man?
    May be...

    There's another generalization, many a times- they children of driven men and women- take a totally different path. Gandhiji's son, Swetha B.

    I agree, that a long marriage doesn't mean a happy marriage. My parents would have left each other if it was easier for them, they are both driven people.

    I agree, that each post is coming from a person who has a different perspective, there is no right or wrong..all are interesting.
     
  10. ivlakshmi

    ivlakshmi Platinum IL'ite

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    I came accross a guy who is extremely ambitious.. I was attracted to him as i am little ambitious and i do a decent job compared to my laid back ex. I was quite impressed after talking to him and I did not know that he is in to good position .I jave come to know only after seeing his linkedin.This guys salary was 4 times greater than my salary. I was impressed only by his talks though but he rejected me later on. Later after observing him and seeing his choises it looks like he is only attracted to someone who is more achieving than him and some one who is posh in dressing but may not be in looks .. I am feel that I am far better off than the ladies he is dating in terms of looks but high on maintenance types.
    This made me feel not to go for high achievers though.
    on the other hand my friend married a guy who is under achieving but she always complains that he is not keeping her well and he is a lazy bum.Always wants her to take care of family and he wants to leave the job all the time.
    I feel being a man one should have the right attitude to be comitted and work for the family
     

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