Social Anxiety

Op.social anxiety is not a big problem. Try to contact counsellors if required. Try to be happy about urself. Accept ur self and repeat "I am beautiful,I like myself IAM going to get a good and healthy baby " always . it is a self motivation. Then u can slowly make good friends. Identify people who share ur way of thinking. We all go through problems and come out of it. It is a part of life. That's all.

 

Have you ever thought why do you feel weird or overexcited?

Are you feeling insecured ? Scared ? Threatened ? Are they too pretty ? Over qualified ? Richer ? Some thing ? Anything ?

Or is it just about you being the newbie ?
Everyone stares at you when you talk ?

Make short conversations or observe till you feel you are ready to talk. Keep it short and not long enough to show your discomfort.

You don't necessarily need to look into their eyes when you talk, look for a second, look away like you are thinking n talking or look around. You will soon find something that you work.

Forming a group, you can pick a few people you like, and form a group. A few members maybe part of other groups too, that's common.

Joining an existing group Is good too. It may feel like catching up till you start feeling comfortable. Because they already know each other n you are the new one. They will talk about old memories, past trips n moments n stuff like that. Be closer to someone n you can catch up on popular experiences.

This is like joining in a new office / a new team. You would put in the effort to catch up n mingle n be a part of team right ? Similarly this takes effor too.

Maybe this lady knows about your social anxiety so tries to avoid face to face or social interactions.
Whatsapp is an easy way to communicate without any anxiety.
You start making an effort to meet rather than expecting from her.

Is this the first time you are going through this social anxiety n getting along with groups ? Then it could also be one reason.


Finally, if you want to have a social circle, hang out, go out, make friends. It has to come from you. They have already formed their circle, you are the newbie, so all the effort has to come from you in the beginning. But soon, you will have a gang of gals too.

 

if u r in a career, u r already into social circle. just little conscious effort you would enlarge your pal circle. all the best always.

 

You should try joining a social skills class if there is one in the area. But most important of all is to work on building your self esteem. Once you have a child you will be busy but you will also have to make attempts at socializing to set play dates etc . So try to work on your self esteem now. You can join any classes etc that force you to interact with others. If eye contact makes you uncomfortable , look at the forehead or the nose of the person you talk to or look away at brief intervals.
If you suspect the lady in your community is gossiping about you refrain from giving her too much information. Don't feel bad about not being a part of the groups, you can try but if it doesn't work not the end of the world. It's hard to infiltrate a group when the members have a cliquish behavior, so make friends outside . Start small with one on one socializing . Maybe at home where you are more comfortable . Once you feel better move on to socializing with larger groups . But again one does not need to have lots of friends to be happy. A few genuine ones and you should be ok. Make sure you pursue hobbies so you are not overthinking all this.
Good luck !

 

@lotusbud as someone who suffers from spcial anxiety, I understand the inability to socialize and feeling on edge. Its terrible really... Propranolol worked for me for a bit in that it takes the physical symptoms away, but soon lost the effect.