Sil Didn't Tell Me She Delivered 2nd Baby..despite Good Relationship

None of my cousins shared their pregnancy news with me. I knew about it only after their parents or inlaws invited my mom to baby showers. I live abroad, and the only way I come to know is through a text message "Blessed with a baby girl/boy, mother and baby are doing fine" and thats all about it.

My friend of 10-12 years revealed that she was 6 months along even though we used to talk to each other on phone and discuss everything about life, career etc.

I thought its a very common.I have no suggestions for you OP, I am just a co-venter here!

 

I am going to give you a different answer, how about stop making this issue about yourself and feel happy for the baby and mom!
May be the cousin sister in law told your MIL and your MIL did not mention it to you and cousin sil kept on waiting for you to congratulate her but you never received the message so never called her, sil thought this woman does not even call me to congratulate I will not even let her know baby was born!
Just bless the baby and let it go!

 

Don't mind me asking.. do you have kids of your own? Why I asked is because my dh's very own sis did this to me when she conceived the second time. She herself conceived 6 yrs post marriage. 1st time she shared the news personally. I was so happy for her. She went on to deliver a healthy baby boy. Second time she conceived, she didn't tell me until abt 6 months. When I asked her, she and her mother ( my very own mil) made up the excuse that they didn't want to hurt me that she conceived 2nd time and I don't have even one!! C'mon why should I bother..If I don't have one in this lifetime, will the whole world stop trying for a child. Lame excuse...What else!!
I felt bad initially but now stopped bothering completely. I simply don't take it to heart nowadays..

 

Yaar, take it easy. You never know what was happening at her side. She might had some pregnancy issues or mood swing. Some in laws might be sitting on her head and1st child could be demanding. She may break or cry If she started to open things with you. Give her some time. She did not forget you guys ( you and hubby) so that she texted you. Be kind don't jump into negative conclusion.

 

Dear OP, I can understand how you feel but you are not alone. I know a friend who was not informed about her SIL pregnancy stating that she would feel jealous since they didn't have one of own. But the family informed everyone else and my friend came to know about others.

My friend never asked her SIL about it and took the high road. When I asked her how she feels, she said " It's a revelation to me and my DH and knows exactly where to keep whom".

So take this as a lesson and move on with your life.

 

@Vedhavalli
I had a fairly difficult 2nd pregnancy and to be honest, I didn't really tell many people until after the baby had come as well. Having said that, I did let my family know that I was pregnant but I did not get to see them much during my pregnancy and therefore a lot of people were taken by surprise when we announced the birth of my baby. It was a very difficult pregnancy and a very difficult birth. I didn't even have anyone visit me in hospital. Looking back now, I wish I'd reached out to my aunt to let her know that I needed her to be with me.
Is it possible that she too had a difficult pregnancy and therefore chose to keep it under wraps until the baby arrived? If you are friendly with her, the best approach would be to say, "I was very surprised to hear that you have a second baby, you certainly kept that one quiet!" and then wait to see what she says. Usually there's a mundane reason and she'll tell you so if that is the case. If she tries to avoid the subject then I guess you have your answer, I wouldn't push too much.
By the way, did anyone else in the family know? Or were you the only one kept in the dark?

 

Sorry to sound negative. She was using you to feel positive and that's why chatted and check your WhatsApp status. Now since she is busy with her new born baby she won't have any time to chat or talk with you. Even if you ignore her she won't take notice of it.

It really hurts when someone hides important stuff from people with whom they chat on regular basis. Wonder why people do such things. Why waste others time if you do not want to be open with them.

 

There may be 100 reasons for this. They might have consciously made a decision not to tell you. There might have been others too that they did not tell. They may have been really busy or it may have been a high risk pregnancy that they might not have wished that anybody know. Chill. If this gets repeated over time with other issues you too can reciprocate.